Tuesday, 31 August 2010

  • Help! Tips For a Virgin

    Now, to clarify, I am absolutely NOT expecting to lose my virginity anytime soon. Not only am I only 17 and very much raised to be wary of sex (see here), I just don't think I've found 'the one' yet. However, I do believe that being a late participant in the world of sex will most definitely make me lacking in said topic.

    So I guess what I'm trying to say is this: if, and when I finally do have sex, what are some pointers that you'd recommend could make for the experience to be that much more... mind-blowing? I do of course, mean for both participants because I highly doubt I'll be having sex with someone I don't love.

    So, people who are experienced (I assume), sound off and help this poor sucker, please!?

Related Posts

Comments (28)

  • bonezzzzzz@xanga

    Dont raise your hopes up
    sex is overrated

  • babymeatball@xanga

    use lube, be gentle, go slowly, communicate, make sure you're both comfortable with eachother, relax. 
  • tendollar4ways@xanga

    Haha...it will be over before you know it.
  • phuck_may@xanga

    i agree with the first poster. :)
  • moon_on_a_string@xanga

    All I can say is... be nice to the girl.
  • xmariia@xanga

    @bonezzzzzz@xanga - wooorrd.

    Make it a sharing experience for both of you. My first time, I felt like my bf took it from me rather than shared it with me. It was horrible and I wish I would've waited for a better person, but I thought I was in love. :I
  • xLaurenFaceeex@xanga

    i wish this had been posted before yesterday..
    i just lost my virginity.. but it really wasn't as scary or embarrassing as i thought it would be.
    i wasn't really expecting anything, cuz that would've been kinda dumb. but i did enjoy it. (:
  • The_Aftershock_3650@xanga

    Read SerenaDante. her Dr. Serena posts address stuff like that extremely well.
  • Hinase@xanga

    Honestly, since you're not the girl...you won't get the worse of it. It's the girl you have to worry about. Finger her (if she's a virgin too) so you can get comfortable with her. Just relax. It won't be pleasurable for the first few times (if you're doing a virgin as well) ; just relax. Communication is the key. 
  • cubancutiepie@xanga

    Communicate! Very important, I think. If you love her, and she loves you back, it won't matter if it was "good" or "bad". Read up on some books together so that way it's not such a shock. Use a condom!
  • greenglow28@xanga

    it's not going to be good the first time.

    or even for probably like the first year.

    or with the first person.

    so "mind-blowing"?

    simply not going to happen.

    just let it be what it is, it will not be good.

    this isn't me being pessimistic for you,
    simply... I've never met someone who had good sex the first time, with the first person they had sex with.
    I had sex with my first boyfriend for nine months.

    I never had GOOD sex until my second boyfriend.

    and that's been the general consensus of anyone I've discussed the topic with.
  • presque_la@xanga

    @greenglow28@xanga - That's not necessarily true for everybody though. It's common, but not inevitable. I'm 22 and I was planning on saving myself for marriage. I was a virgin until this year, when my long-term boyfriend and I ended up having sex in the heat of the moment. We both agreed as things got carried away. It wasn't planned, but we were protected because I'm on the pill for non-birth control reasons. He was extremely gentle, and took it slow. It wasn't disappointing at all, felt great, and we both climaxed at the exact same time.


    I must say that it WAS a mind-blowing experience, and was probably the best sex we've ever had together. It was my first time, the first person, and even after almost a year of it, that night was still the best sex we've ever had, and it's still amazing. After the first time, it happened a second time the same night. Incredible. But, maybe I'm just lucky? Haha :]
  • laurenmaureen@xanga

    relax relax relax. that's the key. trust. it makes it a lot more comfortable. just relax your body and take it slow. and remember: the first time is not the best time. it will get better. and like the above said: be gentle with the girl. she has the worst end of it, if she is a virgin too.
  • XxShatteredVanityxX@xanga

    @presque_la@xanga - I'm going to say you are lucky lol

    But I'm not going to say the first person you have sex with sucks and such, first time does suck but the more you do it the more you enjoy it. At least thats what it is for me :P
  • greenglow28@xanga

    @presque_la@xanga - what @XxShatteredVanityxX@xanga - said.

    lol. I'm happy for you, glad your experience was better than most.

    I'm just trying to tell the OP not to sweat it if things don't go well because it's all too common that they don't.
    I also don't want him to sweat getting "tips" because it's just not something you can prepare for adequately, you know? you kind of just have to let it happen when it's right and hope for the best, see where things go.
  • presque_la@xanga

    @greenglow28@xanga - You're absolutely right. I'm just very thankful that my experience was great, especially since I was waiting for marriage. I placed such a high value and importance on saving myself, so I would have felt awful if I had been disappointed by my experience instead of waiting until my wedding night. I guess it's rare though.
  • SharonJo@xanga

    @tendollar4ways@xanga - lololol.
  • cmdr_keen@xanga

    http://nsfwchristian.xanga.com/726961158/the-double-virgin-wedding-night/

    Is a great guide.
  • align___t@xanga

    i honestly think its way easier for the girl, because even though it hurts a lot the guys do all the work. but quite honestly as long as theres chemistry, comfort and love it'll be mindblowing in itself don't worry about pressure none of it matters. you're with the person you love experiencing something beautiful


    @greenglow28@xanga - ha my first time was mindblowing idk what ur talkin bout lol


    i think it just depends on the chemistry- mine was this ridiculous chemistry, high stakes, in tune, crazy situation, feelings already, high intensity but relaxed, and we were just ourselves- it was one of my best experiences-- absolutely beautiful and special and perfect. but the best was when we went to the same place, and it was night before we were going to try to end it. and that was amazing... (we thought we'd never see each other again). i honestly think chemistry is the only thing that matters. good chemistry equals phenominal sex- also comfort, and feelings which all contributes to that knock out chemistry
  • too_pretty_to_die@xanga

    geez, that's like asking, "hey, i'm gonna become a chemist someday... just not any time soon.  but can anyone give me pointers on how best to (insert some incredibly advanced chemical process here)?"

    you learn sex by having sex.  unfortunate but true. 

  • Thumper49047@xanga

    the first time is memorable only because of the adjective, first. If anything to make the first time more "mind-blowing" is to remember that for the rest of your life you will use it in your "replay reel" for when sex is boring, bland, unexciting or unfulfilling. My first time, SUCKED, but yet, I still see her, remember her perfume, her touches, everything - and yet, still can get off to that even when her face has been pixilated out by time...
  • P0RCELA1N_D0LL@xanga

    sounds like you're going to also have sex with another virgin after marriage so it'll be awkward and will probably go like this: are you just going to sit there or get naked? oh yeah huh, I should take a shower first. hurry up! then you come back and she fell asleep on the bed and you are unsure if you should awake her since it is your honeymoon night or be considerate and wait. you don't want to be bossy so you wait. then it is time owww! she yelped. you freak out and don't want to hurt her, so you go slower and then it is quickly done. you think to yourself, great that was it?! she feels the same way. 1 year later when you're more comfortable, then mind blow sex ensues


    there are no tips. just go with the flow

  • MiSS__NARA@xanga

    you dont have to worry about being "good" in bed if you're doing it with "the one" because they shouldnt care how "good" you are anyway.
  • fob525@xanga

    @phuck_may@xanga - Hahahah!
  • bearsexxx@xanga

    Don't just lay there and let him go at it. It will not be fun for you or for him. Don't be afraid to tell him it hurts or if that position just feels awkward voice your opinions tell him what you want to try and see if he's cool with it. I wouldn't suggest anything overly kinky for your first time though. Oh and make sure you shave your legs before hand and any other areas that you may ehem choose to shave. :P

  • Sign in to Comment

  • Give eProps (?)

About the Author

Who recommended?

Who gave the eProps?

2 eProps from: