Wednesday, 28 July 2010
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Does Your Guy Have to Be a Perfect 10?
It’s not only books that we shouldn’t judge, it’s men too. Look what happened to Charlotte in Sex and the City. She ended up with a guy who was a cross between Mr. Clean and a naked mole rat. It all comes down to the sparks, the fireworks, the energy between you both, the “je ne sais quoi,” which unfortunately us humans cannot control.
So this whole “who’s your type?” ish is driving me absolutely crazy. No one has a type, unless we’re only talking about looks. Do you want to date a human or a Ken doll? Now obviously you shouldn’t completely rule out the physical attributes but they definitely cannot not be the deciding factor.
For example, I went out on a date with a guy who was John Travolta circa Saturday Night Fever. Pretty hot right? Well it wasn’t until my spicy tuna roll arrived, that I learned that this guy had a Forrest Gump fetish and had as much personality as a goldfish.
Do you know guys with great qualities but you never thought to give them a shot because of their schnoz or bad acne? I am for sure guilty as charged for this offense. Come on people, we all need to get off our high horses!
I know, I know, we all want Taylor Lautner, but six packs fade, my friends, and can immediately transform into the OTHER six pack...of beer.
Haven’t you been walking down the street and noticed a couple and thought to yourself “How did HE/SHE end up with HIM/HER?” Drum roll please...it is simply because they got the chemistry! Are we that superficial these days? It’s often the couples that are each other’s physical soul mate that are the ones that end up badly. I’m pretty sure that Brangelina is headed for disaster. What is Shiloh supposed to be.. the Jesus of beauty? Anyway, I’m not saying that two attractive people can’t find love with each other but you do NOT want to be someone’s arm candy and visa versa. So what if the cover is somewhat worn, it is the content that is important!
So I will leave you with some food for thought: Have you dated someone solely based on their appearance or personality?
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Comments (40)
well I went out on this date with this one good looking guy, but found out shortly after he was a real tool.
so I guess, yes, I did solely on looks... but it wasn't a real relationship.
Well looks are what attract, obviously. I won't be the one to pretend they don't matter. But I'm also of the opinion that the more you fall for someone's personality, the more attractive they appear to be. If you really fall for someone, you kind of ignore their flaws and focus on the really adorable things about them. No one I've ever been serious about was someone I found incredibly attractive. They were cute enough, sure, but I fell in love with who they actually were.
Besides, dating a "perfect" looking boy would make me incredibly self-conscious. :D So no, no perfect tens here.
One of my exes was pretty hot...but a douche and a complete idiot. I dumped him within a couple of weeks. There has to be something up there for me to deal with. Some of my exes were definitely less attractive than I was, but that didn't matter much. In fact, I think the two most unattractive people I've dated have been my longest relationships...
It's definitely nice being sexual attracted to your SO though. I mean, of course it matters more what type of person they are, but I'd rather be grabbing muscle over fat :/
taylor lautner makes me wanna vom btw. he's got a face like a llama.
i likes who i likes.
I think the really cute ones always tend to turn out to be the most boring or obnoxious or manipulative ones. Additionally, I don't like dating boys who look better than me.
Personality is what's important in the end. Sure, he might reel me in with his charming boyish good looks, but at the end of the day, if he can't hold a conversation then goodbye.
I like this post. I am usually way too picky and hope that I will someday find a perfect 10, but that isn't realistic...
@babymeatball@xanga - lmao I'm so glad I'm not the only one who was thinking that. And honestly, Taylor Lautner would be more attractive if he was actually good at what he does for a living. He just isn't an actor. *dodges Taylor Lautner fangirl punches*
When I see a guy, I really don't think much about the way he looks. I start to try to look more into who he is. If he's a good guy, then I would be able to look at him and say, "he's attractive." I mean, I'm not gonna see a guy's six pack and say I don't find it attractive, but it doesn't necessarily attract me to the guy. I have to know the guy's personality before I can tell you if I'm attracted or not. Great abs, great arms and a great face are just great abs, great arms and a great face. The personality is what brings out the attractiveness as a whole. If that makes sense.
Well I always go for a combo of both, at least he can't be a total douche, and easy on the eyes. Not a 10, but you know, chemistry has to be there too :)
it's mixed for me, i've dated good looking guys who were dumb and then others were smart, not soo good looking guys who were smart and others were dumb. it not so much about the looks for me, it's about if our personalities mesh well together. if we have nothing in common and there's no conversation, doesn't matter how good you look, i'm not going to be interested.
Instead of dating someone for things that you look for, why not be open to dating someone who dont possess qualities you don't want?
That list is a trial and error one but it broadens your horizon and you may just find happiness. http://bit.ly/9Amn3t
My guy is a perfect 10. In my opinion at least. (:
I've never dated based on looks. And because of that, I think I've gotten genuine guys. I mean, hey. I've been dating the same guy for almost 3 years. I'm doing something right. Right?
yes he does have to be a perfect 10; 5 points in personality and 5 points in looks.
I guess that depends on what your perfect 10 standards are. There are some things that are a necessity, yet other things that are merely bonus if had, if not, can be worked around.
I do get occasionally become infatuated with someone because of his physical features, but I could never like the person enough to date him if he doesn't have a good personality.
I will never date a guy based on appearance alone. Because if a guy is that good looking -- he knows it and he knows how to spread his love around with every girl he can wink at. And if he's not out their loving on his many lady followers, he's gay.
There are many contributing factors.
Good post. I've never gone after someone based on JUST their looks or JUST their personality. I would not want a perfect 10 because I am not a perfect 10. I read just recently that the man is more supportive in relationships where he is less attractive than the woman. This post reminds me of this article.
I found out something really ironic recently having to do with looks vs. personality for attraction. My husband was initially attracted to my personality alone, he says, not my looks really at all. In fact, he had to GET USED TO my hair in particular when deciding whether or not he was attracted to me. I have very long, ringlet-curly hair that I get many, many compliments on. "You have SUCH beautiful hair!" or "You are so pretty, and your hair is amazing!" And he didn't even like it at first. LOL.
All my exes and my husband are attractive. Call me shallow, but I can't make-out with a guy who's appearance doesn't turn me on.
It's weird, I've never met a cute guy with a bad personality. I think it's because I only find guys with good personalities attractive. My boyfriend is gorgeous AND he has an awesome personality. He's my soul mate. :)
i'm definitely more concerned with personality than looks. i don't care how hot you are, if you're an asshole, you have no chance. my boyfriend isn't brad pitt but i think he's really adorable. and his personality rocks. couldn't find a better match, honestly :]
BEWARE OF MY LONG RANT BELOW (i can't help it I love to talk about guys)
Actually I am the opposite I don't have a specific appearance I like a guy to have but I do like them all to be into good music, deep, and caring. I am not into sporty guys, guys who have to act gangster all the time. So maybe cliche is more like what I don't like. Now the exceptions are some guys who are gangster or into sports are also very into those things that I like it has happened to me before then I don't mind your athleticism or behavior. It all depends on the person. Faces are more attractive than anything, and then after I approach you it's all about the personality. Also confidence is cool but shy guys can sometimes appear more mysterious and awkward guys are also adorable and I feel put at ease around them.
You know, I got really lucky. I started off dating a stereotypical nerd with a wonderful personality (he had to convince me to give him a try, no lies.) and great brains. Now, more than three years later, he's lost over 100 pounds, works out almost daily, wears contacts over his glasses, and cut his hair all sexy like. And, he's probably going into the military on the ROTC program to get a good education and a secure job. So I already have a perfect 10. He's amazing.
@Escapists@xanga - I totally agree. I did the same thing, my guy turned out to get motivated and now he's wonderfully attractive. xD
I went out on a date with this incredibly good-looking guy, all ready to be disappointed cause all other good-looking guys I'd met were either idiots or complete jerks (or both). Turns out the incredibly good-looking guy has no idea he's hot, he is amazing, has the most beautiful heart and personality I've ever seen and is somehow in love with me. Been together for 3 years and getting married next year. So you can't judge a guy for being good-looking either.
There is so no such thing as the perfect guy or the guy being the perfect 10; Looks matter to a certain extent, but that's not all to a relationship, and if that's how relationships are then..they are shallow and it won't go anywhere.
Looks are deceiving really for anyone.
A lot of my previous bfs have either been called ugly, cute, gay..etc; it just depends really, but what really matters to me is personality. I mean, I found the one I love. So why does it matter? I'm not a perfect 10 in any way. I'm just myself.
You can only judge a guy based on personality and character. It will clue you in how they would react to certain situations etc; Again, looks aren't everything, that's why I try to be friend with people that no one else will be. People are too concerned by outer appearance too much. The inner counts just as much..lol