Friday, 23 July 2010
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Help! Why Is He Texting Me?
Attention Datingish readers! One of your own needs some help!ally_bay_bee asked:
I met this guy when I was visiting friends at their beach house. I met him while out at a bar and then he spent the whole weekend with my friends and I at our house (he was there visiting his friends as well). We hit it off and talked non stopped. My friends loved him and we had a great time. We didn’t hook up at all but the chemistry was unlike anything I think I’ve ever experienced.
When we both got back to our lives and reality set in, I didn’t expect to hear from him. He has texted me almost every day but has never suggested we hang out or has asked when he can see me. He doesn’t live around the corner but he doesn’t live far enough where we can’t hang out. I brought it up to him that I wasn’t sure if we are ever going to hang out and he said to me “what do you mean? Of course we’ll hang out.”
Why is he texting me and interested in talking to me all the time if he doesn’t really have any intention of actually hanging out or perusing this?
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Comments (35)
Maybe he actually likes talking to you. Even if he didn't want to date you or something, friends are nice.
He wouldn't be texting if you if he wasn't interested you in some way...even if that way isn't a romantic one. Just keep talking to him, see where it leads, and have fun with it!
oh my gosh i have the same problem and i want a lot of people to answer this question!
Yup maybe he likes to take it slow and get to know you even more.....why are you in such a hurry if he isn't eh? Play it cool eh?
mmm, I wish the girl I am "seeing" would want to see me as much but nope she's too busy all the fricking time.....whatever pretty soon I'm not even going to bother!
He may just want to know you first or maybe has a gf? Not to be a downer
*scratches head*
If you want to hang out with him, why don't you make the first move? There ain't nothing wrong with a lady asking a guy to hang out or making the first move. If he declines, hey, at least you know he's not into you like that.
Maybe he wants a friend? Or maybe he also felt that chemistry?
yeah, maybe he has a girlfriend... or he really just enjoys taking things slow and doesn't want to rush into anything. maybe he's got some personal things he wants to take care of first. i'd just go with it. why don't YOU ask him to hang out?!
Fear is enough to stifle any effort. He doesn’t want to redefine the set expectation, I'm
assuming that he wants to hang out but he wants to build comfort enough to the
point hanging out is minimized do to economic, prior obligation (girl friend)
or you're not really worth the investment for some odd reason. His objective
here is to get to the point and meet his need with minimal effort. Sorry fellas
I don't know what possessed me to tell, its been happening a lot lately.
He may well be waiting for you to make the first move. He knows that he is interested in yourself, but doesn't know how you feel, and therefore is a little cautious. Go for a coffee sometime, you never know, you might be onto a keeper
in my experience guys like that are pretty much just setting it up to be able to "hook-up" if they ever happen to be in the area. just my bitter experience though.
Well he did just say he would. Maybe he actually likes you and respects you and doesn't want to rush into hooking up and whatnot right away. How's that so weird? Just see where it leads.
@JaydenWolf@xanga - exactly.
Suggest to hangout yourself. Take initiative.
Wait it out.
Perhaps he is taking his time to get to know you maybe he doesn't want to seem too pushy
uhm...? I'm still trying to figure out what the question is... it sounds like he said he wants to hang out, but you're asking why is he texting but not wanting to hang out... someone please clarify.
... I'm just going to answer as best I can, and say chill. ask to hang out. don't think too much of it, see what happens... it doesn't really sound like anything too abnormal to me!
Maybe he's not the sort of guy that is just looking to get in your pants and then leave shortly thereafter. If that's not the sort of guy you're looking for, tell him to shove off. If it is, just enjoy the ride (or lack thereof).
I bet he has a girlfriend
What the hell? Did I read this wrong? He likes you... and you like him... and he says you guys will hang out, yet you're confused why he's talking to you? What the fuck woman? This guy is legitimately interested in you and not pulling a disappearing act and you're going to complain?
He does want to hang out, he probably just doesn't want to push the issue. Or, maybe he's busy and can't squeeze in the time. Like you said, you guys don't exactly live down the street from each other.
Just go with whatever happens and stop over thinking the issue. He likes you. He's talking to you. The rest will follow naturally.
Seems like you don't "have any intention of actually hanging out" or PURSUING (not perusing) this, not him. He's txting you all the time, of course he wants to hang out! He EVEN SAID SO!
you're so sprung for this guy that you are either absent minded or want things to move quicker. he said, “what do you mean? Of course we’ll hang out.” yet you are asking why he texts you and has no intention of hanging out
maybe he is one of those people that loves texting and has unlimited text messaging plan so he texts non stop like he probably does with many other people.
Maybe he's afraid of the next step because he's had bad experiences in the past?
LOL i ask my friend that all the time, i always texted say and night until i just tell the guy im prolly never gunna see him again.
just screw around. don't take it seriously.