Thursday, 22 July 2010

• Confessions of a 31-Year-Old Virgin

  

  Yes, everyone, as hard as it might be to imagine this, at the age of 31 (yes, you're reading that right, thirty-one) I'm still a virgin. Whenever I mention this in conversation to some of the guys I hang out with at the local brewpub (don't worry, I never drink 24 hours before a flight) if the conversation turns sexual, needless to say questions abound and they all want to know why. I suppose here I have time to articulate what I don't have time to do so in conversation.
  
  First off, I should state that I have nothing against anyone who chooses to have sex for whatever reason, be it within or outside of marriage. I do not pass judgment on anyone who chooses to have sex, as it is quite frankly a natural urge. It's your body to do with whatever you want, just don't go forcing your choices on me. Further, I'm not a Christian or any sort of member of any Abrahamic faith, so premarital sex doesn't go against any personal moral or religious convictions. My reasons for abstaining from sex stem purely from logic, reason, and personal choice, and most of which revolve around my career.
  
  So why am I still a virgin? First off, my job requires me to be in the utmost physical and mental condition 24/7/365. The day-to-day life and hectic, busy schedule of an airline pilot is extremely stressful and takes its toll on your body. Trust me, after I complete my weekly route on Thursday evening, I've been flying for four days straight almost, and I am so tired you just can't comprehend (granted, I do have pretty good breaks between flights and I do get plenty of time to sleep and recuperate on my route). The last thing I need is some sort of illness bringing me down, and since flights have to be staffed to keep passengers happy, I can't afford to miss work. The last thing I need is some sexually transmitted disease making me feel miserable, or even worse, unfit to fly. As even the best methods of protection can't guarantee 100% protection from STDs, the only logical choice for me is abstinence.
  
  Second, here's the way I see it: yes, sex is pleasurable. I don't think anyone is going to argue that. However, there are other ways to get pleasure as well. My job being one of them. I think I have the best job in the world, and if you ask any airline pilot, they will tell you the same thing. I don't need sex to be a happy person. I've got everything I need already: a career I love, amazing coworkers, and my #1 hobby which is music. All of which are risk-free to enjoy and make me a very happy captain.
  
  Third is my love and passion for what I do. I help people connect to their friends and family. I help businessmen and women meet their appointments. I make dreams come true by offering people the opportunity to see parts of the country they've always wanted to see. I take great pride in my work. Hundreds of passengers every work day rely on me to show up on-time for my flights and get them where they need to go in a timely fashion (of course, we're well-known for our 25-minute turnaround times and speedy service, making our brand #1 in customer satisfaction). Passengers have busy lives and they can't wait for me to show up, because their appointment times don't change. I can't be staying up all night having sex then showing up to work late, or otherwise not getting any sleep and showing up to work sleepy and putting them, my flight crew, and my copilot in danger.
  
  Fourth is the fact that, quite frankly, I just don't want children. I decided long ago that I didn't want children (I just don't think I have the right personality for it), and when I started my career as an airline pilot 11 years ago, my busy, hectic schedule and the fact that I'm away from home three nights out of every week (used to be more than that and unpredictable at times, since new hires to the world of airline piloting are hired on as "reserve pilots" and are on-call around the clock). The fact that I'm away from home all the time, I think, would have a negative impact on whatever children I might have. Hence I believe the responsible choice is to not have children, and as with protection against STDs, the only 100% effective way to keep myself from impregnating a woman is to be abstinent.
  
  Lastly, and probably most importantly, is the fact that I still haven't fallen in love. I'm 31 years old, but I've never even so much as had a serious girlfriend. I'm a life-long single, and I often joke around and say that I'm married to my work. Even though I'm not a Christian (or Jew, or Muslim), I believe sex should be something special between two people who are in love. I might fall in love sometime, and I might not. However, whatever happens, I'll be fine with it. If I never fall in love, I'll die a virgin, which is OK with me. It's whatever happens.
  
  So those are my reasons for being 31 years old, having an established career, yet still being a virgin. As I said, I pass no judgment on anyone for whatever decisions you make. You respect my decisions, and I will likewise respect yours.
  
  With that, I must go start preparing for my next flight. Until next time!
  
  What do you think? What other professions might make keep you a virgin longer?

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