Does NOT mean I'm not interested or that I don't like you.
Hell, I could be in the god damn hospital/emergency care...which is actually what happened. Case in study:
I randomly run into a girl at the local Best Buy. I normally will date rather off girls. The kind who only try to hide their crazy from your family. You know the type. She's smiling to your mother, and then chasing you around with a knife as foreplay in the bedroom. She dresses all nice, but she's either a mortician or a grave digger. You talk about how a cliff looks great for diving off of and a second later she's screaming, "Great idea!" and pulling you over the edge in all of your clothes. You know...the kind I normally like, but I'm getting older and that's not working out so well long term.
Well, girl in question is cute, the girl next door type, seems sweet and interested. I normally don't have weekends off, but I knew I had a following Saturday off and was planning on going to the Renaissance Festival, so I make mention of it and she says she'd like to go, so we make it a date.
In a fun and not creepy stalker way, she sends me text messages over the next three days repeatedly. I don't mind because I have unlimited text for people in my same network and she calls when she has the chance to. Well, later on Monday I get that severe food poisoning.
Over the course of the next three days I am puking my guts out as well as evacuating my bowls harder than any enema a doctor can give you. I end up in emergency care, hooked up to IV's in order to hydrate myself. They couldn't even get a blood sample due to how dehydrated I was because my vain would first collapse and then it ripped...and it hurt like a son-of-a-bitch.
During this time, what do you think that my main concern was? Yeah, getting better and trying to keep my mother, who is on vacation in California, to relax instead of worrying about me, and finding a way to repay my grandmother and cousin for rushing me in to get taken care of. The last thing on my mind is pounding out texts and answering my phone when I could barely remember where I was half of the time.
Finally feeling better I check my cell phone...
Oh...my...god... I have 25 text messages and five missed calls. All of them are from her. The texts start off nice enough, and then slowly turn into, "Fine, ignore me and be an asshole." At this point I'm feeling just good enough to be walking for myself, and grateful for being able to urinate again. I wait until I am driven home to answer the texts. I simply answer with the truth, figuring that a female that I have known for a grand total of four hours in person doesn't need a huge explanation of detail.
"Sorry I did not respond. Was in hospital for food poisoning."
From the reply of her text, this was her expression when she read what I sent her:
The text she sent me was, "You don't have to lie. If you don't want to go out, fine, just say so." I was literally scratching my head because I was being honest with a woman I barely knew and didn't owe one bit of an explanation to. I really should have just cut off the conversation and let it be, but I became infuriated. I told her that I spent my time in the hospital, on the verge of kidney failure due to the dehydration, and am lucky to even be up and walking at this point. She basically accused me of just acting like "a guy" to string her along and that she wasn't going to play those games.
Being the skeptic that I am, I decided to call her thinking that maybe, just maybe, she had me confused with someone else she was seeing. Her answering of the phone was, well, less than pleasant. No, I didn't get into an argument over the phone with her, that would have been stupid.
Being that I was still in a bit of pain and trying to breath regularly, I just listened for about five seconds, after saying who it was, of her screaming that I shouldn't screw with people, and that she would have respected me for just not contacting her again instead of playing games.
"No. I was in emergency care. That's why I can't go on Saturday, but we can do something else," I inform her. Well, she was not interested and began on another tirade. So, I did what you are gifted to do when on a cell phone: I hung up. Why would I sit there and let you berate me over the phone when I can end it? Yeah, that's right, I won't.
I honestly expected her to call back to continue the screaming, but she didn't. No, I didn't attempt to contact her again, I'm not dealing with that.
So, honestly woman, just because a guy doesn't call you in four days doesn't mean he's being a dick. Life happens, and just because we know you, doesn't mean you're on our top priority of contact when we can only lie on the floor. Especially if we barely know you. The relationship status takes a while to develop, so don't go assuming that because we've been out a time or two...or in this time talked for a while, that we're an item.
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Comments (77)
lol. wow...that's hilarious and incredibly insane.
Aww that sounds terrible! I've had food poisoning before, it's no fun. Maybe this girl has been through a lot of crap with guys and I know she doesn't deserve it, but a second chance is always nice. She may just have severe trust issues.
I enjoyed the addition of suitable pictures to this blog post. Hahahah.
Huh, that sucks. Guess she wasn't the girl for you. Oh well. :)p
i hope you're feeling better-sucks that you got sick
but honestly that girl is insane, not the good kindand to the comment hollowtendencies (i'm not really sure how to link the name here) left, i'm sure she probably has been in situations to make her think/behave that way but for the length of time they knew each other, that's just a ridiculous way to act! even if she was to get upset at first because of being treated poorly in the past that's one thing but like you said- a second chance is always nice, and she could have given him one by giving his "excuse" the benefit of the doubt
hope the next girl you meet doesn't start your first fight before your first date!
Sounds like she's really sensitive. I had a similar incident with my boyfriend - he got SO pissed at me for not calling him for 2 days.
While she did overreact, I can also understand her side. you made a plan with her and then "stood her up" - couldn't you have taken 5 seconds to txt, "sick - wanna hang out in 4 days?"
Some of my friends do that and I just don't understand why. It only shows that the girl is needy and has low self confidence.
Agreed. Big time.
I sort of did this before. But we were dating. He was sleeping. And my parents were pretty upset about what "we" did. I called him a billion times minus the texts bc texting wasn't the big IT then.
But yeah, I can kind of see where and how the girl feels.. I mean, it's not everyday that an "excuse" become reality and it just sucked that it happened to you.
She must had been really interested in you to get that upset over it.
Agreed. I'm one of those people that don't call or text all the time and I can go a few days without talking to someone. But, I've gotten accused for not caring or not showing interest when I don't initiate a conversation every day. Not true at all.. sometimes I'm busy and sometimes I just don't know what to say.
what if the guy knows you pretty darn well, and you're 100% sure they're not dealing with an emergency? and if it seems like they have the time to do everything in the world but talk to you?
my point is that most of the time, guys really don't care about relationships and keeping in constant contact as much as girls do. they don't even bother to communicate that they don't want to keep in constant contact.
so, yeah, there might be an emergency like you had. but the majority of the time, it's probably not.
Sadly, with my ex, it did mean that he was being a dick. But, it took me two weeks of holding back from any contact to even start acting like the girl you described, and in my situation I had every right to.
I was completely understanding of his ignorance of me, and by "understanding" I mean "pissed as shit" because his life was never busy, it was the same shit every day, a little work then driving around smoking and looking up car parts to buy online. He apparently got bored of me and thought ignoring me would work as a break-up...I didn't take THAT at all and reamed his ass.
Glad he's out of my life, haha. Guys like him are cowardly, lazy pieces of crap.
Probably better that it ended like that...
Sounds like you got rid of Crazy before Crazy got rid of you. :P
@psychopathic_ambition@xanga - Exactly, idk why it's so difficult to text for some people, it's like, the laziest form of communication & it's not like it's wasting hours out of the day.
Well... if she was going to text you so many times when you're not even together, imagine what would have happened if you ended up dating her?
Talk about attached
heres my question though. what if it's a committed relationship? now I don't expect much when it comes to contacting, because I'm a very busy person. but when I take 5 seconds out of my 12 hour work day to send a "hello" text, I kinda expect a "hey I'm alive" text by the end of the day. especially if it's a full on relationship situation. am I completely insane in thinking it would be extremely rude to not reply? for 5 days? (yes it happened to me and it pissed me off so I broke up with him because I didn't have time to chase him around.)
She's being kind of crazy for not accepting your excuse and at least giving you a second chance, and I can see where you're coming from...but, dude, you stood her up with no warning. From the sounds of it, it's happened to her a lot before, so I can see why she's pissed, too. Due to the circumstances, you unintentionally stood her up and completely ignored her. They were unavoidable, yes, but a lot of people would be pissed off before knowing the circumstances.
But, seriously, a facebook status post or a twitter update would set everyone straight in 10 seconds, because, unless you don't talk to anyone but your family, there were probably other people that were crazy-worried that you disappeared off the face of the earth for 3+ days.
@psychopathic_ambition@xanga - I would have had no problems doing that, but the
date hadn't even occurred yet. I was out of the emergency care on Thursday and we were to go out on Saturday. Also, I was delirious and couldn't remember where I was a few times, which is why I knew I had to get in to see someone about it.
@twentyounces@xanga - Yeah, and I can respect that from people, too. Just don't blow up my phone and my ear.
@ivarahBharavi@xanga - If I was stringing someone along, I would have come up with something better than, "I was in the hospital" and have the bruising in my arms to prove it *LOL*
@beautyful_disasterr@xanga - Yeah, and while I do like a girl who really shows
the interest and all that...there is a line you don't cross.
@darkangel6541@xanga - Well, I didn't stand her up. We never had the date yet. It was to happen on Saturday and I got out on Thursday. The only "standing up" that I did was on the phone by not getting back to her. I'm also one of those people who will get on Facebook once every two weeks or so.
Man I'm sorry that sucks, but the whole spazzing over texts and you know the severe trust issues are a bit of a red flag so it's probably better off it didn't work out I hope your at least doing better I've never had food poisoning so bad that I had to be in the hospital.
I do have a girl who 'likes' me that texts me all the time saying she loves me and that we're meant to be together and all that jazz when we've only been talking for about two days now? It's a bit beyond creepy. I mean a flirty text or various ones are fine, but day two of talking should never involve at least in a serious manner talk of being together forever and/or the l word in general unless of course you don't understand the meaning and reality of both phrases at least in my opinion. Anytime I don't immediately answer the texts she presumes I'm angry when in reality I'm usually busy and to be quite honest she's scared me off in record time (I've never had a girl scare me off within two days o,o) . I plan to talk to her soon and make it clear that I'm not interested in that way I'm just not sure how to go about it just yet. :x The sad thing is if she hadn't gone all stalkery and creepy on me I probably would of wanted to be with her in the future, but I'm the sort who likes to take things slowly.
So I feel your pain about attracting crazy girls and I hope you're able to find at least the right kind of crazy that you know syncs with yours. :P Or at least an interesting sane girl who isn't a huge red flag.
ding ding ding! crazy alert!
Let's not criticise that girl too much since we are judging her in hindsight. How would YOU feel if you sent numerous messages and called many times.... and get no reply?
Also...
Dating is always a bit of a mindgame.
yikkkkkes. good for you.
People joke about me being crazy, but I definitely know there are much crazier chicks out there.
I will text a guy once or twice and if he doesn't answer me that day, I'll try him at a different time and day. I haven't seen my guy-ish in almost forever and I haven't acted as crazy as that chick.
I have to say that I understand the girl's point of view, because she DIDN'T KNOW that you had food poisoning. I mean, just exactly how many times does that happen after a date? How was she supposed to guess?
But on the other hand, instead of going absolutely insane she probably should have believed you. I mean, if you were really being a jerk you wouldn't have even contacted her after four days! But hey, at least this predicament gave you an instant sign that she's definitely not someone you want to date.