Wednesday, 09 June 2010

• Surviving a Breakup

  
  You're a ball of whimpers and tears. You haven't gotten out of that fuzzy bathrobe you've been wearing since Tuesday. There are piles and piles of empty chocolate boxes, Ben & Jerry's ice cream containers, pizza boxes or cans of PBR. Eric Carmen's All By Myself has been playing on repeat for the past five hours.
  
  Get a hold of yourself! You may get into a slump, a traditional routine that you partake in once the word "break up" sinks into those bags under your eyes but you've truly been defeated if you let it take such a toll on your life. There are people who can quickly pick themselves up (although they are emotionally bleeding) and get back into the groove of life. But for those who need that special amount of time and care...here are a few tips you can use to get out of your slump.
  
  1. Pack It Away
  The first step to moving on is moving out. Not you, but everything that reminds you of that person. Those mixtapes? 2 lb chocolate you received for Valentine's Day? Pictures, pressed flowers, letters, even those earrings he bought you or that wireless pink XBox controller engraved with her name that she bought you, pack it away! Put everything in a box and tape it shut and store it in a place you're bound to forget (the attic, preferably). Better yet, if that person did you wrong, throw it away. There's no use in reminding yourself of what "once was" or of the pain that it brought.
  
  2. Cut off Ties
  The worst thing to do during an inevitable breakup, is to try to keep in touch with the ex. On both sides, it's unfair. Whether you're not over the ex or that person isn't over you, one of you is either leading the other on and the other is hanging on to something that's already moved on. Don't answer those late night texts. Resist the urge to send one. Delete the number. I know you've memorized it, but it might deter you more if you have to manually punch those numbers in.
  
  3. Get in Shape
  Remember gaining those 15 pounds in the last year due to all that wining and dining and Chinese take-outs? If the weight gain has been affecting your health, mood, activities, working out is an extremely great way to direct your focus somewhere other than your ex. Not only do you start concentrating on yourself and forgetting about your ex (or even better yet, showing him in a few months how amazing you look without him/her), but you'll also be, well, looking delicious.
  
  4. Stay Away from Alcohol
  Unless you're strangely great at NOT drinking to your emotions, alcohol will probably emphasize how sad you feel and make you want to rip open that box you taped up in your attic and go through every single love letter you and your ex exchanged. Those 5 glasses of Yellow Tail wine will not make you forget your ex, if anything, it'll probably remind you more of that person.
  
  5. Improve Friendships
  Even if you didn't push away your friends during your x-year relationship, it's always nice to get closer to them. Maybe even going away somewhere with your closest friend will do you some good. Venting, listening and sharing will open up your eyes and help you see the world clearly.
  
  6. Get a Hobby
  Not only are there possibilities to cultivate yourself, but you meet other people who share the same interests! Cute other people!
  
  And of course, there's that overused saying. Something about the gaggle of catfish in the sea. Imagine the possibilities. Don't regret. The last relationship has only taught you things about yourself and relationships in general and now you can apply what you've learned to the next one.
  
  Have you ever been in a post-breakup slump? Did you try any of these to move on? Would you add anything else?
  
  As my last post as a Datingish Intern, I wish you all good luck!
  

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