Monday, 17 May 2010
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I'm Glad I Cheated
I dumped my long term boyfriend, Ryan, earlier this week.
I couldn't have been happier about it.
The weird thing is, Ryan didn't seem too upset either. In fact, later that night he seemed downright peaceful and happy.
Which leads me to believe he wanted me to break up with him and gave me an ultimatum on purpose, knowing I would never change my mind about sex before marriage.
Meaning; He has been done with me for a while and just didn't want the hastle of breaking up with me, so he let me do it for him.
This infuriates me beyond words.
I'm mad at myself for spending all that time feeling guilty for cheating on him.
Cheating=bad.
Ryan leading me on for who knows how long (and possibly cheating on me, he alluded to something..)=worse.
I'm glad I cheated emotionally with Beau and physically with Nick.
I am glad.
Have you ever been glad that you cheated on someone?
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Comments (170)
yeah i cheated on my boyfriend and then found out he had another girlfriend the whole time , so im definitely glad i cheated
I'm glad my boyfriend cheated on his ex.. With me.
We've been together for two years as of June 6th, 2010.
He's somewhat inconsiderate and sometimes he just makes me want to scream, but I'm still glad he's mine.
nope, ive never cheated on anyone. i actually think cheating is a cowards way of saying i dont want to be with you anymore but dont have the balls to tell you to your face. but thats me. sounds like you shouldve dumped him awhile ago.
No. I'd feel horrible, even if he'd been cheating as well.
And: You and Ryan were as bad as each other, clearly. You were both in the wrong -- he for stringing you along and forcing that ultimatum when he knew your stance on sex before marriage; you for cheating. I fail to comprehend how your infidelity towards the one you were going to make such a commitment to makes you feel better, especially when you obviously did it before he "alluded" to anything. Your actions are no better than his: "Cheating=bad.
Ryan leading me on for who knows how long (and possibly cheating on me, he alluded to something..)=worse".
However it's certainly for the best that your marriage is being called off, from what you've expressed ... neither of you seem able to handle that commitment anyway.
i don't know how my life would have ended up without it, so yes, i suppose so.
sounds like a keeper.
Watch out for Karma.
you don't have sex before marriage but cheated physically with Nick, so you do everything but sex?!
I don't feel glad for cheating as I don't do that but I have a good riddance feeling when I dump jerks.
If it's not working out, break up. I'm not sure why people have to cheat in order to prove a point or rub it in... just have the courage to break up.
@cdedodgethis@xanga - Ditto. This is exactly what I was thinking. I have cheated on someone before. It was years ago, and we worked things out only for me to find out that he was a crazy, manipulative liar. That said, I still think that cheating on him was one of the worst mistakes of my life. I should have just walked sooner. No matter how badly someone hurts you, it is never okay to hurt them back.. especially since it sounds like you didn't even know that he wasn't as into you when you cheated.
yep. i wish i wouldve done more acctually! my bf and i broke up tuesday. we were only together two years, but he lied to me about everything. like he would tell him his phone was dying and go out with his friends or go hang with his cousin or just take a nap instead of talk to me. BIG FAT LIAR. i only talked to a couple guys and didnt do anything too terrible but i wish i had! i would feel so much better! i plan on getting revenge though... possible pictures of me making out with his best friends emailed to him? that would be LOVELY. oh those best friends recently told him that they dont like him and they think hes annoying. ITS WHAT HE GETS!!! =] i wish i wouldve cheated.
....you guys just sound psycho.
Did you ever think about the fact that maybe he knew you were cheating on him with two guys and was glad he didn't have to confront you and was also glad he wasn't with such a...well, yeah.
are you rationalizing your cheating?
Yes, absolutely. Women need to cheat. Relationships are rooted in power and if a man believes that the woman has no more power to give him, then he will leave her. It does not matter how good or kind he is, the man will leave. He will give some nebulous reason for dumping the woman ("I'm just kind of at a weird place in my life....") but subconsciously he will leave the woman because he will sense that she has nothing more to give him. Once she has given him her heart in its entirety then he will move on.
A man can sense it when his girlfriend cheats. It's something in the way she walks, the confidence with which she carries herself, the way she lets her eyes linger on other men for a quarter-second longer than appropriate even when her boyfriend is sitting right by her. The woman who cheats exudes power. She knows that more than one man wants her. She knows that she does not need her boyfriend. She knows that she has a few back-ups.... and the man knows that there is something left in the woman that he's not getting. He knows, subconsciously that if he takes her for granted, he does so at his peril. He knows that she still has power... and he will stay with her even if he does not know exactly why because, subconsciously, he knows that she is not entirely his yet.
Frankly, because women are fertile less longer than men, show their age more clearly than men and are less likely to attract lovers past their thirties than men ... women cheating is the only way to begin to level the playing field. So yes, cheat away. Use condoms, don't get caught, don't let anyone have an opportunity to take compromising pictures and don't do anything illegal. And if you're in the US, adultery is not illegal It is in Korea, so be careful there, but not in the US, Canada, Europe, Mongolia and a host of other places.
More power to you, darling. Been there, done that.
Its healthy. You needed to know what else was out there. He wasn't meeting your needs and you had to do what you had to do. I'm happy you're happy. Anyone who is judging you clearly (a) has never been in your shoes and (b) is so insecure at the thought of someone cheating on them they're going to stand on a soap box right now and point the finger.
Fuck them. Life is far too short to be unhappy.
Cheating is the cowards way out.
@phoebester@xanga - thanks, i was hoping to read something completely retarded tonight.
I love how guys have GFs and can go fuck around but then tell you in your face...I love my GF.
likkkee what??and then they respond back with...its just sex.
yeah ok suck my cock.
No, because I have a healthy relationship, based on honesty in the first place. If I thought my boyfriend had any ulterior motives, I wouldn't be with him.
I hate this blog and I hate that people are agreeing with it. Someone could wrong you to the ends of the earth and back and you still should NOT be happy that you have done something as FILTHY as cheat. Two wrongs DO NOT make a write. Seriously people?! Geez.
are you sure your glad or is that just the anger talking????
LOL.
Well, you cheated on him, emotionally and physically. If there's ever a reason to be "done" someone and not want to put yourself through anymore emotional trauma, it's when your SO cheats on you. You betrayed trust, I don't see how you have the circumstances to play victim and act like what you did is noble. And to be happy you cheated is shameful. End things with with your current SO if they don't meet your needs.
You said he alluded to "something," but you don't have a confession. If he did something he would most likely tell you, but I would expect him to be happy and peaceful. Maybe he just became comfortable in a crappy relationship. It happens all the time.
@WordsandThoughts@xanga - News flash: recently, it's been proven that it's actually more
productive to be insecure and attached in relationships than it is to
follow your kind of logic. From birth, babies learn that when they cry
their parents will nurture them, hence our development of trust for
people to provide support and love. So when you detach yourself from
your significant other to the point where you can cheat and betray
trust and love so easily, you are technically defective merchandise.
Perhaps it's not that people who are "insecure" and afraid to be
cheated on that have a problem, rather it's your inability to function
successfully in society that creates your bitterness and morphs your
perception of how the world works.
I was eighteen years old. Young and stupid. I let myself be the other woman because I loved him and he made me think he'd leave his girlfriend. It was selfish and wrong and I will always regret it, because I hurt someone else.
Bottom line, cheating is wrong. Cheaters are not always bad people. But I expect people who make that mistake to learn from it. I know I did. And if all you can say is that you're glad, that's just... tragic, I think.
@WordsandThoughts - I'm not judging her as a bad person for cheating. But I am saying that there are some things that supercede your own happiness. You can't just say 'Well, I wanted it, so I did it, and that's okay', because it's not. You owe something to people you profess to care about. Otherwise, just end it, and avoid the hurt. It's not right to knowingly hurt someone else.
@phoebster - Wow. I hope that was a satire of some kind that went over my head.
maybe because he knew you were cheating on him.