I don't see why not. As long as you don't act out on those feelings AKA go off and cheat then I say your feelings are completely normal. But if this is really affecting your life or your relationship with your husband then I suggest you should probably seek professional help.

I have struggled with this issue personally in my 10 year marriage.  I too appreciate the intellectual stimulation I get from discussions with the opposite sex; my male friends appreciate my frankness which comes out more since I do not feel the need to play the games women play when dating.  I have found that the men I interract with need to be told ahead of time that our relationship is platonic and that if he ever feels otherwise the friendship has to be terminated.  

I think that these types of relationships can be healthy or dangerous depending on what you intentions are in your relationships outside of your marriage and if you would feel comfortable with your husband having a comparable interaction with other women.  And you have to ask yourself are you seeking these interractions... and is it because there is something lacking in your relationship?

of course, it makes perfect sense to be absolutely unavailable but yet connecting.  to me i use them as signs to make sure that i'm not going crazy and that i'm doing what i'm supposed to be doing.

@lilchocaholick@xanga - Very insightful.

@lilchocaholick@xanga - good point- are these connections satisfying because there is something lacking in your marriage?  if so, you may be at risk for cheating.

there can absolutely be innocent crushes!!  i am dating a guy i am head-over-heels crazy about.  but there's a guy at work who is SUPER hot.  i talk to him, joke around with him, catch myself watching him work sometimes, and drool over him with the other girls.  i feel no guilt (he is totally beautiful, after all )  BUT if i went out for drinks after work with him, told him things i didn't tell my guy, had vivid fantasies about kissing him/sexing him up, then i would know i had to watch myself and limit my interactions with him.  i would never go to an out-of-town business function with him, or meet him alone anywhere. 

if you ever feel tempted to cheat, just make sure to take precautions.  don't put yourself in a situation where it would be anything BUT an innocent crush.  ask your hubby to come along when you meet with these friends, or only meet in a group, or make sure it's a casual coffee date on a saturday afternoon, etc.  don't do anything with them you wouldn't do with a girlfriend/wouldn't mind your hubby doing with a female friend.  like everybody else is saying, there's nothing wrong with the thoughts as long as they don't turn into actions. 

i had  to say i love my dad deeply ,so i agree with you indee  

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