Sunday, 25 April 2010
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Unisex Survival Guide: That Time of the Month
On my drive to work this morning I was talking to my current boy about my change in appetite and sleep cycle. The date had slipped my mind, but I finally realized what was going on: My period is coming.
Any guy that I've dated has always asked me the same questions about my period:
"Are you a bitch on your period?"
"Are your cramps bad?"
"Should I stay away?"
And I've always asked the guys the same question:
"Are you opposed to having sex on my period?"
"Would you ever buy my tampons?"
"Will you just be a little sympathetic to my pain?"
I thought I'd give my perspective of how to survive a girl's period for both sexes.
MEN
-Girls should never use their period as an excuse to be a bitch.
Yes we get irritable, but I've always believed that a period is no excuse to treat people like shit. If you see that she starts snapping, just leave her alone. She'll sulk for a while, and blame her bad temper on you AND her period, but she'll eventually get over it, come to you and apologize. While this may be the case, it also doesn't give you a reason to purposefully poke and jab. We aren't caged bears who are hungry, though we may act like it at times...-Cramps are never good.
I know what your asking is about the pain level, but hear me out: No girl is going to have a good time with cramps--if she gets them. Yes, they're going to be bad depending on her pain tolerance level. Yes, her cramps combined with her irritability will be a double threat to you. Just give her some chocolate, a hug and leave her alone unless she asks you to stay.-You should stay away unless you're told otherwise.
Period's for some girls is like the hulk. Sometimes we turn into ugly monsters who just want to wreak havoc. Other times, we're more tender. Either way, approach with caution.-Get over your phobia of period sex, if you have one.
It's a known fact: Sex while on the rag is sometimes the best sex a girl can get. Increased sesitivity is a great thing to take advantage of. What are you scared of? A little blood on your buddy? Take a shower, have sex in the shower, put a towel down--trust me, if your girl is up for it (which most of the time she will be...period's MOST of the time increase a females libido) give it to her.-We don't ask you to buy tampons because we want to embarass you.
We ask for two reasons: We really need them and don't want to go/can't go ourselves or we just want to know what you'll say. It's sweet when a guy is willing to buy that sort of stuff, but it's also not something a female should expect from you. If you're uncomfortable with it, tell her. Chances are the guy at the checkout counter has been in the position before, and if it's a female clerk she'll know you're a sweetheart for being willing to buy your girl tampons.-Sympathize a little.
I'm not saying to get on your knees and kiss her feet, but when she's in pain or a little crabby it'd be nice for you to not get crabby back. Just say 'I understand that you're on your period, but it's not a reason to bite my head off' if she gets too crabby, but also let her know you're there for her if she needs/wants a hug or to talk. It goes a long way.WOMEN
-Don't expect your man to be your bitch.
Being on your period doesn't make you handicapped. Yes, I know you may be in pain but you can get off your ass to get your own midol and chocolate. Same with getting tampons. I know it's sweet that he'd buy them for you, but it's YOUR body. YOUR vagina. YOUR period. Take responsibility for the hell that mother nature puts us through every month and get YOUR own tampons.-Don't be a bitch yourself.
You're going to be irritable, but that doesn't give you a reason to be a bitch. It's not right for you to yell at your guy for breathing in your general vicinity--the man needs his air too! Relax, breathe and realize that it will pass. You don't need to make your surroundings as uncomfortable for him as your body is making it for you.-Potassium is your friend.
Midol and chocolate will only do so much. I recommend eating a banana at least once a day when you're on your period. I eat them twice a day--one in the morning and one at night. It helps your cramps to be a little less painful and frequent.-A hot shower/bath goes a long way.
It will relax you and make you less of a bitch.Just a few pointers!
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- From: beautifullymindfull@xanga
- Name: Chelsea
- About Me: Politically incorrect, morally insignificant, sincerely blunt.
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Comments (47)
My boyfriend likes being my bitch. :/
Other rules for girls:
I know right now you are thinking that maybe you two aren't meant for each other. Maybe your relationship is too stale or he just doesn't appreciate you enough or he appreciates you too much and its smothering. But before you press send on that "we need to talk" text message remember that you NEVER make these decisions on your period or the week preceding your period. EVER. Huge chance you are going to change your mind. All these second thoughts and doubts are also called hormones.
As for being a bitch. Sometimes I literally can't help it. Like it is out of my mouth before I even realize I was going to say it. So what I try to do is remember why I am being a bitch. He isn't the enemy, it is just hormones. Realizing this I apologize and tell him I am sorry, wrong, and if he doesn't want to deal with it I understand, but in that case we need to watch movies or something where there is no verbal interaction because it may happen again.
Rule for guys never say, "It because you are on your period!" Um, shut the fuck up you don't me or my hormones. lol But trust me, never say it. But if you are with a girl long enough you will eventually be able to distinguish normal anger and hormone-induced anger. The latter is always nutty and uncontrolled. If you really think she is legitimately behaving like a psycho (and she really isn't one) it is hormones. If she is mad at you and acting in control but still furious about it, you just did something wrong and you need to fix it.
I agree!
Although, Jane ^ above said guys shouldn't ask if you're being bitchy because of your period. I think if a girl is acting mean and he asks, he's trying to give her an out- provide a reason to justify the rudeness. If she's on her period, then she should know that he understands that there is a reason for it. But if she isn't, then she has to realize that she's being over the top for no good reason!
Jane makes so many good points. What else can be said?
As for the having a bath while on the period thing...I've never tried it. I think I'm kind of grossed out by the thought of sitting in a tub of water while I'm slowly bleeding into it, therefore I'd be sitting in a tub full of my own menstrual blood. Ewww??
pretty good pointers. Although in my experiences, it's usually girls who asks other girls if they're being a bitch because they're PMSing...
@Kyren_SkyRyder@xanga - I once read somewhere that your menstrual blood doesn't come out when you're in a body of water because the pressure of the molecules of water bouncing around keep it in. Idk if that's legit, but i've never bled in water before.
...then again, I ALWAYS wear a tampon when I'm on my period. No matter what I'm doing (I still have my V-card, so I wouldn't be getting it on...) So I couldn't verify that.
these are generally pretty good rules. I lessen cramps with a heat pad. LOVE my heating pad. :) And i don't really get cranky when I'm at that time, I get crazy weird. hahaha. I wouldn't ever ask my guy to get tampons either- I think he'd probably do it (he's really sweet and a total gentleman) but he's kinda shy so I think even though he'd do it, he'd be embarrassed. :P
when I'm having bad cramps, I tend to be more quiet because I'm trying to tolerate the pain. I don't yell at anybody unprovoked but if he asks me annoying questions like the ones you've stated, then that'll start to push my buttons
lol he should just cuddle with me and don't ask questions, just be obedient, silently cute and cuddly
The way I see it, if us girls have no choice but to suffer while being on our periods... then guys should have sex with us if we are on it. I can understand not wanting to make a mess or not being able to do it in certain places on your period, but if you are near a shower or bathroom and are still scared? Too bad! Shut up and do it damnit, it's not our fault we get it and you shouldn't have a choice either! Just don't look, geez...
for me, i don't get bitchy and snap for no reason, but i do get really irritable. like little things will annoy me much more than they usually would, but the point is that its still something that would annoy me even if i wasn't hormonal. i would probably just censor myself and not say anything normally, but when i'm pmsing, its like i can't hold back and i have to say something. its like the annoying volume got cranked up.
my periods so irregular that sometimes the only indicator that my its approaching is that i get annoyed by everything.
omg, cramps. for some women its really bad. mine have gotten better over the years, but sometimes i still get the excruciating curled up in the fetal position cramps. i think its really hard for guys to understand because you never feel that type of pain unless your on your period. but yeah, try to be compassionate. its like as a girl, i will never understand how painful it is to get hit in the nuts. except we get that horrible pain on a regular basis.
And tea! Non caffeinated tea is a girls best friend = )
Do girls really get that bitchy prior to/during their period? I've always become quieter and more sensitive in a weepy kind of way rather than a hormone-raging bitch.
I'm one of the lucky ones who get cramps once in a blue moon - almost literally once session a year.. Anyway, I do not know how scary women are during their period. My mood swings are crazy. Even if I get angry, I cry. >_> But I also become over affectionate so...
Dude...it's not all right to REQUIRE that all men have sex with their girlfriends when they have coagulated blood oozing out their vaginas. The thought makes me want to vomit, and I'm sure it makes some men want to vomit, too.
Period smells bad.. like blood does. It's sticky and messy. I wouldn't coerce anyone into having intercourse when menstruating. Nor does it sound like a good idea, no matter how intense the sensations would be down there. Depends on how 'dirty' you like it.
When you say "current boy," do you mean the boy who you're helping cheat on his current girlfriend?
I think that period sex is disgusting. Absolutely disgusting. I was dating a guy once who wanted to have sex with me while I was on my period. Not only did that not happen, but because I knew he was into that it made me way less attracted to him. Just reading that made me nauseas. Ick.
Bath + Period = Ew. Haha. Shower yes, bath NOOOOO.
I like the post though. Especially the cramp part. I have cramps that are so bad (when I'm not on birth control) that you can physically see the muscle spasms in my lower back and sometimes in my stomach (which someone else pointed out to me) and I don't lay in bed all day. I may not go to the gym, but I don't skip class/work/whatever because I'm cramping, and I never try not to ask for anything from my guy unless he asks if I need anything. Though it is nice when I am laying down when he brings me something extra to be sweet... especially if it's Mexican food. That makes my day. I usually cry about it. Haha!
And my something to add for the guys: Remember that every girl's period is different. Just because you have one girlfriend that wanted you to stay as far away as possible, it doesn't mean they all will.
@my_horizon@xanga - Yes yes yes yes YES.
Thinking about sex while on my period makes me want to vomit. =_=
I agree to all! but i slipped this time and snapped when i was on his phon elike usually to check facebook and found somethin else.... more on that in my last weblog... on my page =[
@Utoppia - I've noticed that! I've NEVER had a guy ask me that question (yet), but I've had girls on more than one occasion ask me! My friend Rose always assumes I'm PMSing if I get frustrated or irritated with her at all. :p
When my cramps are bad, they're really bad. Like, I break into a cold sweat that even a fan aimed directly at me can't get rid of, and I can't even get up to go to the bathroom without having to half crawl there. I usually have to go into a defensive nap while waiting for meds to kick in, it gets that horrible (T-T)
So sometimes yes, other people need to do stuff for me when I have the bad cramps XD
My period sucks. Before I got put on birth control to regulate it, I literally had no control over my emotions. I have done what Jane said.. the whole "we need to talk" thing. I don't know why but my period makes me over-analyze and over-think EVERYTHING.
Now that I'm on birth control I just get crampy and weepy and horny. Like suuuuper horny. :(
@my_horizon@xanga - and I just puked in my mouth...
When I first started dating my boyfriend, his sister told him to ask about my cycle so he would know when I am going to be moody. My response was that I am always moody and it has NOTHING to do with my period.
How many times was the word "Bitch" mentioned?! haha
Good to know - thanks! lol
I actually just got a monthly visit from my enemy yesterday and she's still here hopefully until tomorrow. I can be really irritable when I get my period and just lash out at everything. It surprises me too because these are things that I don't normally get upset about but when I get my period, it seems as though every little thing pisses me off. I don't really get bad cramps but my lower back kills me all the time. I'm on birth control and even though it says it helps to lighten the flow of a period, for me I still get heavy periods so that adds on to the frustration.
But I'm just fortunate enough to have a loving husband who would cater to my needs, if and when asked. I don't normally ask for much or for him to treat me different just because I get my period but there are times where I do ask him to sympathize with me when I become a bit of a bitch.