Thursday, 22 April 2010
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Sometimes It's Just Nice to Know You're Not Alone
Dear D,
I just want you to know...
...you're the only person in this entire world that I completely trust, 1004% of the time. Always. And honestly, I thank you for that. Because just when I start to think all humans are complete douche bags and everyone will hurt me and no one can be trusted, I think of you and I realize the world isn't all bad.
...you're the one I come to when I feel like complete shit, because you not only make me smile, but you make me laugh until my sides hurt. And half the time you don't even realize you've said something hilarious until I tell you so.
...I think you're adorable. Not just the way you look, but the way you act is just so damn cute I want to give you a big bear hug all the time.
...I love that you put up with me. I love that you understand I'm a mess, and you know I've got issues, but for some reason you don't care and you stick around anyway, no matter what kind of crazy shit I put you through. I have never intentionally hurt you and you know that, but apparently even the accidental pain is somehow worth it.
...I love that you listen. No matter what it is I'm bitching about, you just sit there and lend your ear. And you always try to understand. And even if you can't, you always know how to make me feel better.
...everyone has their moments of weakness. It doesn't make you any less of the strong, determined, ambitious person you are. It makes you human.
...I don't regret anything I've done in the past year, but every single day I wish I could've made the choices I did without them affecting you in such a negative way.
...If for some strange reason you ever wanted an arm of mine, just say the word and I would find a meat cleaver and chop it off for you. Yeah it's pretty morbid, but hey, you know me.
...who you used to be honestly and truly does not matter to me. Who you are on the inside is who I love. Whether you're fat or skinny, tall or short, boy or girl. All I care about is getting to spend the rest of my life with you.
...I love you more than anyone and everyone on the face of this Earth. It may sound horrible, but my own family comes second to you. If I had to choose between saving 6 billion lives or saving your life, I would selfishly choose you. I love you so much it actually causes me physical pain in my chest if I explore the true depth of those feelings.
...I love how you call your dad Mufasa. It's one of those things about you that I find so adorable.
...I love that you love animals just as much as me. Dogs? We can have 30 if you want. Just as long as you stick to our previous agreement of me having my 4 cats and you always cleaning the litter boxes. :P
...you are an amazing artist. Your work blows my mind, honestly. Don't ever thing you don't have what it takes to reach your nerdy dream of becoming a Manga-ka. You will definitely make it.
...speaking of dreams and nerdiness, I love that you're a huge nerd. I know I always tease you about your bookshelf full of manga, desk full of drawings, and numerous crushes on anime characters, but you should know by now that I love it.
...your voice is the most significant sound in my life. I could listen to you talk for hours on end, and I have before. Every time we hang up the phone, I start missing it the instant it's gone.
...you're the last thought I have before I fall asleep, the first thought when I wake up, and every thought in between.
...we're getting married one day.
Love,
A.This is a love letter that I wrote to my boy for his birthday. Whether you're the cold hearted "love doesn't exist" type or a hopeless romantic, I'm sure you can find at the very least, a little spark of the feelings I have towards him. It's just as real, maybe even realer than most relationships out there. But the purpose of posting this letter was to give you all a brief look into our love(cheesy as that sounds) before I add the usually gasp-worthy twist that sends everyone into a flurry of "I don't know how you do it"s.
The bomb?
He lives in California, I live in Georgia, and we have never met in person before. We met on a message board about 4 years ago, and have been hooked on each other ever since. I know we're young, but there's no doubt in my mind that I will be spending the rest of my life with him. I don't want anyone else, I haven't wanted anyone else since I met him, and I'm never going to want anyone else. You can try to convince me otherwise all you want, but I strongly believe that as long as you have complete and utter faith in something, it will be yours.
"You're too young."
"You can never know for sure."
"Internet relationships don't stand a chance."
"He's probably a 50 year old pervert."I've heard it all before. You can lecture me all you want, but I'm just letting you know now that I'm a stubborn teenager and I don't care what you or anyone else thinks. :P
The whole purpose of this post is just to see how many Xangans are going/went through the same thing, or something very similar. Sure, I always have him to talk to, but sometimes it's just nice to know we're not alone.
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About the Author
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- From: strawberrysurvsforever@xanga
- About Me: It's getting hard to be someone, but it all works out. It doesn't matter much to me.
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Comments (36)
Yo...good for you. Don't let anyone get you down with their negative 'it'll never work' bullshit. This was a huge pick me up that I really needed thank you for posting this. That letter was incredibly sweet too he's a lucky guy.
I met my love online.
We met in person.
Have been together for 2 years and still going. :)
Goodluck hun
Did you meet on an art forum? If so, which one? I remember I once had a thing with this guy on Polykarbon! >.< Drawing use to be my life for several years and the people on the message board became like my family.
I know two of my friends became a couple, I think it lasted around three years. They saw each other a couple of times and they were so adorable. But they parted ways because I believe he lived in Germany and they both went away to college.
Good luck to you :) Stay strong, I know these relationships are definitely possible!
I envy you the feeling of NOT being alone. I hope once again to feel connected to a heart that I treasure.
I don't even know the status of my online issues. I never know who it is I'm talking to. I find him all over the place with all these different names, and every time I ask his name he just gets mad. He gets mad because I KNOW it's him. Then we have a conversation with the name he's using and everything is ok. I'm almost ready to give up all interent connection all together as I find myself more than frustrated in his lack of honesty. I don't know how he feels about me... but I know he follows me just as much as I follow him. It's like a 3rd graders game of tag-I love you.
It's fun... but I'm getting tired of the name game.
at least I'm not alone though... so you're right in that aspect.
ur life, ur decision...
dont give up on the things that makes u smile...
good luck!! i loved this post
It's going to be really sad if he actually turns out to be a 50 year old pervert.
I fell for this guy online when I was younger, too. we exchanged pics and I saw him on webcam so I know he is indeed the guy in his pictures. I looked forward to talk to him after I got home from school. he was only a couple months older than me. we talked every single day and cheered each other up joking around and making each other laugh. he also expressed his sadness to me and I felt his pain. he shared his achievements with me and everything else whether it be random or serious. we did have small arguments sometimes. I think I became very attached to him because I had self esteem issues and he was like a caffeine booster or ego booster in my life and I did the same for him by saying supportive and kind words. he was very infatuated with me, too or dare I say that he might've even loved me because he'd say that he has dated many girls and they don't compare to me. he'd jokingly called me his wife sometimes but I never called him my hubby because I saw him more as a friend that I could confide in than the sexual kind but I was attracted to him, just didn't want it to go to the next level of the relationship because I did not feel ready for a commitment despite us talking everyday. I think he probably liked me more than I liked him and he realized that we would never be and we drifted apart after a few years.
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i felt like half of these things were thoughts in my mind. thoughts i've been thinking and have expressed. i liked this post a lot. you aren't alone, but you are definitely luckier/better off than my situation haha. i don't know what it is, but these sort of situations always have some sort of foggy lines sometimes. it clears up then somehow it just drifts back to being kinda foggy, and now i don't know what's what. it's like he definitely knows how i feel because i've told him and expressed it a lot. and we talk every single day, yet there's still some uncertainty in it. maybe it's all in my head haha.
i can relate to you though. why does he put up with my bullshit? why does it go through all this trouble to just to make me feel better? why does he even like me for me? i'm terrible half the time. those thoughts =x but like at the end of all these stupid thoughts you're just glad you have someone who cares enough to get past the little flaws. someone who genuinely cares.
congrats =) and good luck!
even though it is an internet relationship.....it sounds pretty legit. cute post
Oh goodness, I'm with you.
My BF is from Cali and I'm from poor old Nebraska haha.
Love the post though. I consider myself a romantic realistic. Still though, lovely post. Cute. Sweet. Awesome ;)
Good luck to you and your future spouse :D
Definitely kinda in the same kind of relationship. I've been in love with the same guy for six years, but I'm actually about to move out there (and yes, he is real). I can't wait to see him and start something better, rather than friendship. And I wish you the best with yours! :)
Good luck to you both! =))
I know a couple who met on a message board online, they were both young. He ended up moving up here to be with her and they have been together for 6 years and counting. =)
Things really do work out sometimes and I wish you both the best of luck.
awwww you're one lucky gal!!
i was talking to a guy once for a few months... when i wrote him a similar letter like yours.. we seemed to drift away... -_-
good luck!! :)
*actually he disappeared on me..
ive been
trying to contact him for a few weeks but i got ignored. so i gave up
=p
i really love this...ure sweet.
My situation is similar. We met on a gaming forum three years ago and were really good friends until he recently crossed the line and told me he loved me. I think he's the one and I'm pretty sure he thinks the same, too. I live in America and he lives in Australia. He's saving up to come here and is aiming to be here sometime next year.
:)
adorable. good for you hun. as long as it makes you happy, that is all that should really matter :)
I'm so proud of you hun. That's awesome. I used to have a realtionship like that but then the guy just broke it off. I've heard all of the comments that people say to me especially the "He's probably a 50 year old pervet sitting in his moms basement" but I didn't care about that stuff we just talked all the time. Congratulations to you, I'm so proud! Have a great day!
Brittany.
you know what the letter you wrote it how i feel for my boyfriend as well~ :)
and im so happy for u
i hope i have could write this kind of letter for him
and show that i love him that much too :)
maybe i will do it because his birthday it next tues
I met a guy online once. It seemed genuine and we really clicked.
We finally met in person, he asked me out, but it was all a fake relationship so he could use me for sex and attention. He went as far as to fake his own personality for months on end so I'd still be roped in.
When he broke it off because I got too smart for him, he lost friends because of how he treated me, it was that bad. These friends still talk to me occasionally, and we're betting on the day he'll get what's coming to him. I'm now in a relationship with the love of my life, and so happy I could burst at the seams.
Back then, I was young, naive, and needed someone. He used my vulnerability to his advantage, and after I finally realized the full extent of what he did to me, I grew up, forgot about him, and moved on with my life, head held high.
I'm glad that you have found someone like this, and reading your letter made me think of my boyfriend now, and how much he means to me. The fact that your guy has stuck around for more than a year shows it, and I'm really happy for you.
Most of my best conversations and moments when I feel most connected to people happen online. I don't quite understand it myself, and sometimes the alone feeling is only half-cured because there isn't that physical proximity, but still, somehow, some people are really good at communicating the best part of themselves online.