No. It's not a sequel.
I've been close friends with two guys over the past 11 years. They were friends of my brother first and then I got included into their group. Both of them are single and on the prowl. Basic info about these two (K and M):
K: Has had two long relationships before, still a bit shy when meeting girls, but warms up once they know them
M: Never had a girlfriend, quite shy but warms up when he gets to know them
Anyways, there is a girl (S) who is one of my regulars at work. We would sit and talk about our current happenings (relationships, school, etc.) S brought up that she has recently become single.
So, I brought up these two friends, K and M, and what they're like and everything. When I go and meet K and M, I told them about S. Other than Facebook, the girl and these two haven't never met each other face to face.
K, being the experienced one, took first initiative to reach to S and talk to her. M still sits a bit idly (the most he's done is say hi on S's wall). Tonight, S and I were going over prospective guys in her dating arena so far. She added in K and M as a tag along and receives information about them through me. I give straight facts and I don't place any bias on either K or M.
S has received K's number and has talked to him over the phone for a small bit and texted as well. (Maybe I should have gave M's as well, which I did, but she declined saying she doesn't want to be too creepy). Later, as I was closing up the shop, I get a text from M saying "If you're going to introduce me to a girl, make sure she's not interested in one of our other friends... douchebag
". I can take it as a joke, but I can sense some irritation in that text.
And now I feel guilty. I fear that this might create some tension between friends and I would be responsible for it. However, I also feel that it's not within my control of who S likes and who she doesn't like. Besides, it's not like I was advertising one over the other. All I did was bring attention of both to S and she tend to go for K first. (I also forgot to mention that she will be coming with us for a week to Florida). I would facepalm myself for that one.
But.... is it my fault that this is happening? I can't necessarily tell K to back off because it's not my deal to do so. I can't tell S to go for M simply because he has never had someone before.
Should I tell M to step up his game? If I do, there will be the competition between K and M that it can result in tension. And right now, I feel like poop after realizing what is happening and what might happen. Help?
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Comments (15)
ouch.
Why not introduce M to someone else? If S and K have a connection, you shouldn't interfere.
Hopefully M and K will be mature about the entire thing. You can't really control that. I doubt M is very far in emotionally, so I think things will be cool between you guys.
ouch, what you should've done was... nevermind... lol
but yeah, what you can do now is introduce M to someone else or tell S that M will be going and that it might be in the best interest if the trip got canceled. there's really not much you can do about it.
It's really not your fault. You can't control which guy S likes. You gave her choices and told the guys about her so they'd have a chance. M didn't take the chance, so, sucks for him. Tell him to suck it up and move on.
M only said a shy "hi." on her facebook wall, haven't talked on the phone or met, so they are just acquaintances and if he wanted to pursue her, he would on his own when he feels ready to take that chance. however, if she is already interested in K then I don't think he should compete with his friend over her.
This reminds me of the movie "My Best Friend's Girl".
I think it's definitely your fault. Playing matchmaker will do that.
It's not your fault that M didn't take the initiative to introduce himself to S. If S and K have a connection that's their deal. I usually try to stay away from match making because from my experience, it never ends well. M probably isn't that emotionally involved with S because he hasn't had any sort of relationship with her, so he can't be all that hurt. He is probably taking his frustration about not being able to get a girl out on you. If he wants to be mad at K for "stealing" S then he is a bit immature. Overall I think things will probably work out for you guys. Just try not to do the match making thing.
Tell M that all you did was introduce ppl to new ppl, and that you cannot control who S decides to like. If he gets rude, then tell him he had no game.. Truth hurts.
uhm idk. i stay out of "introducing people." or if i were to, it would be because i thought a SPECIFIC two people shared a couple of attributes. i wouldn't sound off a bunch of guys and their attributes like it's an auction or something; they have feelings too. i dunno, that part seems a little inconsiderate. to me, relationships should just be more personal than that.
You can't control who S likes or who K likes or even who M likes. It is true that M maybe have lost his chance but there will be someone that he would step for, I hope. It depends on who you are closer with... but judging from the text M seems hurt but at the same time is taking it lightly.
I think he should find someone else. I mean S seems like she has chosen K already.
did you hit that first?
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