Sunday, 11 April 2010
-
Sorry, I'm Not a Porn Star
Now let me get this straight-- I love my boyfriend, we've been together for over a year and our relationship hasn't had too many bumps in the road. Yet, sometimes I feel like he's trying to change my physical appearance.I'll lay out my physical appearance for you: long auburn hair, gray eyes, freckles, 5'3", not extremely curvy, yet I don't consider myself not curvy. But No DD's or a juicy ass. Not porn star material.
A couple days ago I got my belly button pierced and my boyfriend loved it. He told me it was sexy/cute/hot/whatever. I'm not new to piercings; I've had 10 piercings in my ears and my nose done already. Yet, when he asked me if I'd ever get my nipples pierced, I was a little taken aback.
Then he continued to tell me that he has seen a lot of porn stars that had them and they looked hot, and further told me that they would look great on me. Now I'm not completely opposed to nipple piercings, but I don't exactly see them in my future.
Before I met my boyfriend, I had my hair bleached pretty blond for a short period of time. He has seen pictures and said I looked so good/pretty/hot with blond hair, and that I should dye my hair blond again. Seemingly enough, I have heard him make the comment that "girls with blond hair are so hot, the best porn is with blonds."
I don't care that my boyfriend watches porn, Hey it's only normal! But the fact that besides these two incidents is that he has made many comments about hot things he loves on a porn star. None of which I physically possess.
I understand everybody has their fantasies, but I sometimes feel insecure after hearing these things. I really didn't like it when my hair was blond, I prefer my natural auburn hair. My boobs are all natural, and I like them that way. I kind of feel like nipple piercings make them slightly less natural.
Am I over thinking the comments he has made? Or is he just more attracted to hot porn star blondes and wished I looked more like them?
RecommendRelated Posts
Post a Comment
- Back to datingish's Datingish Site!
- Note: your comment will appear in datingish's local time zone: GMT -05:00 (Eastern Standard - US, Canada)
About the Author
-
- From: anonymish
- About Me: This post was submitted by a Datingish reader who wanted to remain anonymous. You can submit your own anonymous post at www.datingish.com/submit-post - just make sure you let us know you wouldn't like to have your username displayed!
Stats: This Week All Time Posts: 0 227 Views: 0 543096 Comments: 0 13046 View all posts by anonymish
Comments (141)
Blondes are sexy.
I hope he's not nagging you to dye your hair or get those piercings..
I think he's over-obsessed with porno materials. Talk to him about it and how it makes you feel and see what he'll say.
I'm so glad my boyfriend likes brunettes better.
I've always said the perfect guy will think you're perfect the way you are.
...sigh. Not going over this again, you need to have a serious talk with your boyfriend.
it doesn't sound like he's being extremely pushy, but i can understand why you would be bothered. if i were you, i'd ask for reassurance sometimes. like when he tells you you'd look good with this or that, say "but you still like me like this, right?"
if he can't give you a straight yes, i'd be worried. let him know you like yourself the way you are and as much as you love him, you don't want to change, and you're not a porn star and don't want to look like one. if he can't live with that, i'd get gone and start looking for someone who loved me as i am.
Seems to me he may have a hard time seperating fantasy for reality. I'm not a fan of blondes and nipple piercings are just whatever but you shouldn't conform for his intrests unless you like the idea and wish to do it for yourself. Cause if you don't your just feeding the fire... who knows he might want you to have those DD's because they are so "hot on porn stars"
The title of this posty says it all. He likes it on a porn star, but the thing is you are not a porn star. At least, not his favorite. You are his girlfriend. The girl he must love, whether you change your hair or have any piercing or not.
This throws a big W-T-F in my direction. Isn't it funny that you started to become insecure now that you're dating him? Were you ever before, or as much? Stand firm with your decision about what YOU want to do with yourself, it's as if he wants to mold you into his own little porn star. I understand trying to look good for your SO... but this sounds like it's going too far. I think you should discuss it with him.
only change if you want the change. who cares what your significant other and what other people think? if your significant other likes you for who you are, your significant other wouldn't continuously expect, desire, or ask you to change.
I pretty much agree with what soyeahthatswhathappened said.Â
i feel your pain, anonymous.
but my boyfriend doesn't really like blondes and always tells me to dye my hair brown. what a hassle.
Some of you girls on here have some wacked out boyfriends i'm sorry to say. I wouldn't dare come out my mouth and say some sh!t like that to my girlfriend. Tell him the next he says something look hot on a "porn star" that he should go date a "porn star", if you don't want it you don't want it.
wtf. your bf needs a smack >.>
Following mynameisblueskye@xanga's logic, you should remind him that you are his girlfriend, and not a porn star. You don't want to get into a Jesse James situation in feeding his fantasy. You should maintain a personal sex appeal, which will remind him why he wanted to go out with you, rather than trying to chase an image he is familiar with.
I think guys like the porn stars in their porn, but does any guy really, actually want to date a porn star?
Probably not.
If it's bugging you, just tell him it is. And if that doesn't work, do the whole fight fire with fire thing. Or, you know, dump him.
maybe he wants to recreate a porn star through you.
Tell him he needs to grow a bigger peen.
Your boyfriend sounds a little over-fond of porn. I expected to come in here and think you were a terrible prude, but you're not, he's just basing his taste too much on his pornographic preference.
@my_horizon@xanga - Hah! Do this. Tell him he should get a bigger cock, like a male pornstar.
Just say, "I'm not a fucking porn star."
@asininity - that's what i'm thinking.
That's weird. My hubby will say things like "Oh I loved your black hair" or even "I really liked your nipple piercings" (I took them out), but to say "I like x, it's what my fave porn star looks like"?!?? That's so insulting. And I'm definitely not one to blow things out of proportion. It's close enough to saying "Oh you should dye your hair blonde, my ex had blonde hair and looked SO HOT!" I mean, fuck that. I'd probably get snarky in that situation - "Oh, pierce my nipples? Only if you get a bigger dick, like my ex's!". Ha. Seriously though, call him on it. That's so inappropriate and rude.
Don't let his perception change your appearance for him. Remember, he should love you for you, not some porn star he has seen elsewhere. If he keeps trying to make those comments, tell him, "I'm not a pornstar. I'm your girlfriend." Put your foot down.
@my_horizon@xanga - @untainted_love_for_her@xanga - You guys get a high five. *high fives*