Dating is exciting because you've met someone refreshingly new (or you see him or her in a new light) and one date could turn into two, four, and those dates could in turn pave the way for a relationship. However, to make that first date turn into several dates, the partner has to be qualified. Even the smallest quirks can make the longest impressions.
She could have informed you that Mother Nature was currently visiting her, or he could have started talking about how much he earns per week, all on the first date. Or they could have just rubbed you the wrong way on the next few dates and therefore you are no longer "interested."
Sure there are relationship deal breakers, such as lying or cheating. But here are some common deal breakers in the crazy but fantastic world we call dating.
1) Talking about one's ex.
2) Not paying...when he/she did the asking out.
3) Talking about your future together. Really? Already?
4) Talking about infuriating or disruptive subjects (e.g., abortion, politics)
5) Talking too much, especially about oneself.
6) Being unnecessarily physically affectionate (PDA alert).
7) Not having a plan. "So what do you want to do? What do I want to do? Whatever you want to do."
8) Bad breath.
9) He/She asks how many people you've slept with.
10) Talking on one's cell-phone for an extended period of time, or repeatedly checking phone for messages or time.
What are some deal breakers for you when you're out dating someone?
Comments (44)
some of those are true
No. 10 is rude! It just shows that you aren't interested with your date.
umm people who don't do any of these things would seem really strange and boring to me.
7 & 8 suckkkkk.
1) I agree. So you guys are friends? Great...doesnt mean we want to know that...especially if I have to meet her later.
2) This makes them a douche to me right away. I mean I bring money anyway & offer but to expect me to pay when you asked? OR!!! Even worse, when they see your wallet & go "oh you got it!". No, I got my food, you wash dishes.
3) This is scary to me if you're talking about what we're doing in 6 months & I barely got through my salad..
4) I dont mind sharing opinions on subjects but I would save in depth discussions for later dates (if any). the first few dates are supposed to be spent getting to know each other.
5) omg, I hate that too.
6) I hate guys that try to stroke your arm like they're petting a dog...
7) No plan means you're not taking much interest. Atleast have some suggestions if you're not sure on where exactly you want to go.
8) eww!!
9) This would make me get up & find a cab.
10) Same answer for number 9.
Number seven would make things more interesting...
Sex! Sometimes people I have only known for a few minutes starts asking about sex like that's going to happen. It's a complete turn off. Like are you interested in me or getting the job done? Go hire a hooker.
Bad breath and farting, complete turn off. Oh, and boogers. Bad teeth.
it's been a really long time since i've actually "dated."
i guess if anything bothers me, it's calling/texting all the time after the first date.
1) Talking about one's ex.
(I don't find this a problem, I'm not really the jealous type and I figure they're apart for a reason and he's on a date with me for a reason (not to mention we just met), and if it's conversation then hey who cares, because you obviously from the rest of the list haven't left much else to talk about...).
2) Not paying...when he/she did the asking out.
(Agreed. It's agitating. Nuff said).
3) Talking about your future together. Really? Already?
(Agreed).
4) Talking about infuriating or disruptive subjects (e.g., abortion, politics)
(I don't really like those topics anyway so I will agree, but for people who are in to that kind of stuff I don't see anything wrong with it... and if the other person really likes that kind of stuff and I don't I'd rather know upfront from them talking about it...).
5) Talking too much, especially about oneself.
(I'm a listener so I just like hearing people talk as long as I don't have to period lol, I actually think it's interesting when the other person talks about themselves and you can get a better feel for them and learn something about them...).
6) Being unnecessarily physically affectionate (PDA alert).
(For a first date that is awkward, but PDA really isn't so bad, it's life... if you seriously can't deal with parts of life that you can't change, I won't go where I wanna go with that sentence).
7) Not having a plan. "So what do you want to do? What do I want to do? Whatever you want to do."
(AH! I hate this shit. Haha this is a total deal breaker for me. Especially when it's a movie.)
8) Bad breath.
(Bad odors are always no's).
9) He/She asks how many people you've slept with.
(Unless you both casually nonchalantly wabbled into that conversation topic then this is a pretty sucky question to ask on the other person part).
10) Talking on one's cell-phone for an extended period of time, or repeatedly checking phone for messages or time.
(Rude).
What's wrong with not having plans. Does everything seriously have to planned out? Life would seem boring and too predictable that way.
the not having plans thing is iffy.
if you really don't know the person, though, then i definitely think that having a plan is the way to go. on the first date, you don't want to be focusing on what you should or shouldn't do - that should be set, so you can instead turn your attention to getting to know one another.
Well I would give 6 some thought if the person was a medical field (PA, NURSE, MD etc)
and sometimes 7 is actually good... They bond just by walking and talking
If he could survive a "number four" situation with me, then kudos for him. I don't really mind if there is no plan, since I'm quite random myself... but a little bit of a plan won't hurt either. Oh, the crazy world of dating.
bad breath/non-kissability, not wanting to spend any money (usually doesn't show its face for awhile), constantly texting and not mentioning an explanation, being creepily obsessive, not responding well to my humor (biggest one right there...but then i'm not sure why i'd be on a date with them in the first place).
the not having plans thing seems like it wouldn't be bad, because after all, who doesn't enjoy some spontaneity? but it can get to the point where you'll just end up not ever hanging out because they won't man up and make a suggestion, or don't like any of yours. VERY ANNOYING. probably not necessarily a deal breaker, but it makes me think they're not very into me, which might break the deal itself.
amen.!
if he scratches his butt and smells his fingers.
On a first date with a guy, he asked me #9, how many people i had slept with.
that was the worst ever. I was soo turned off. Its not his business, its not like i planned on sleeping with him soon, let alone ever, and i was offended and disgusted.
that was the beginning of the end of it, honestly.
No offense, but I kind of expect the guy to have a plan if he wants to eat in his area (and I don't know that area).
@Shinbi_Belldandy@xanga - lol My ex is in a bowling league..he bowls with his ex gf's parents, and now his ex gf. I got to meet everybody..It was horribly awkward. I dealt with this every weekend, luckily her parents were nice, and she & I actually got along...& made fun of my bf at the time.
As for the touchy subjects, a guy I was talking to refuses to talk to me & told me I wasn't really a Christian because I have no problem with same sex marriage, & I'm all for it.
@noPrinceCharming - I'm not saying you CANT be friends with an ex or your SO's ex but right off the bat is intimidating. It also depends on how it ended too. Like if it ended badly between them & they later became friends, that girl may resent you for a while. There's nothing worse than a boy's ladyfriend who's not dating him but acts so possessive in the moment, you know? You didnt want him/let him go & now that he's with someone else, you want the guy.
It's good you get along with everyone though! =D
Lof of bitter people here...
- Revealing that you've got depression
- Asking if you can take a coupley photo
http://plentymorefishoutofwater.blogspot.com/ - dating blog
1. Talking about sex-AT ALL
2. Talking about my body parts-"hey you have a nice rack," etc
3. Getting too personal too soon
4. Asking to meet my friends too soon( first or second date!)
5. Asking me if my friends are Hot like me. (I have had this happen!)
6. Asking if I have a condom.
7. Asking if he got the third party, could we have a threesome??
I'm a little iffy about #2...personally I think both parties should pay for themselves, regardless of who asked whom out. Economy is tough, and you don't want to be in a position where you don't go out anymore because paying for two people is too expensive. That's just dumb in my opinion.
i agreee. :)