Friday, 05 March 2010
-
Talent in Bed
In response to a post about the importance of a man's size, many Xangans wrote that talent was more important than size. I think this is similar to comparing apples and oranges.
It's easy to measure the size of one's manhood. To do so, one must simply ask the questions, is it long(er) and is it wide(r)? The same can be said about the opposite sex: are they a handful and is there enough friction to feel good?
Talent on the other hand, is something that is universally good, yet not universally agreed upon. Whereas one woman may appreciate rough sex, another may prefer gentle lovemaking. While some men prefer it when women take control, others want to steer the ship.
So here are the questions:
What do you think are the best "talents" someone can exhibit in bed?
And, what are the biggest complaints you have about partners?
Discuss.
RecommendRelated Posts
Post a Comment
- Back to datingish's Datingish Site!
- Note: your comment will appear in datingish's local time zone: GMT -05:00 (Eastern Standard - US, Canada)
About the Author
-
- From: pandoratheexplorer@xanga
- Name: Pandora
- About Me: Making sense of the nonsensical; unscripted and uncut
Stats: This Week All Time Posts: 0 8 Views: 0 24017 Comments: 0 340 View all posts by pandoratheexplorer@xanga
Comments (97)
I think a big talent for both partners is to not just do it for your satisfaction and until you've had your fill, but until both you and your partner have been completely satisfied.
A big disappointment is when your partner doesn't know what they want or what to do. It gets frustrating.
If you're relying solely on the size of what you have, then you must not be very fun. IMO.
BAD: sloppy kissers (saliva everywhere), leeches (hickies everywhere), short thrusters (might as well take a nap), screamers (WTF), bad dirty talking (once again, WTF), complete cluelessness (which hole is it?), leaving out the rest of my body (believe it or not, I'm more than a walking vagina), AND MOST IMPORTANTLY DON'T START RANDOM CONVERSATION (just not cool).
GOOD: firmness (implies confidence), slight hair pulling (don't rip it out though), good oral performance (nothing like a little foreplay), paying attention (don't space off at the wall please, that doesn't make me feel special AT ALL), EFFORT AND ENTHUSIASM (=D).
Ha! Uh.....I like someone who can follow what I show him, if I have to, and can ask me what I like. I also like someone who isn't afraid to get freaky------like, he's not hesitant when I ask him to bite, say, my nipples or lick some unmentionable spot!
That's not necessarily talent, though.
You gotta know what your partner wants and if you can meet those needs. If not, what can you do to get similar results?
It's all about knowing what he/she wants and how you can both get yours ;)
@thedommediaries@xanga - Haha, I laughed, but I totally agree. I do like hickeys though - not everywhere though, but the actual biting [as long as he's softly biting and doesn't take out a chunk of my skin] is nice and erotic.
And random converstation? Haha. Me and my boyfriend were watching the History Channel while doing it; kind of multi-tasking and learning while burning some calories xD
Best talents --willingness to communicate, learn, explore, and please. Biggest complaints --selfishness, closemindedness
The technical things (kissing, fumbling, ignorance, etc) can generally be overcome or fixed, so they're not really a big deal.
I think when people mention talent in bed, they're referring to the talent of being able to read the other person. Yes, some like it rough, some like it gentle. Being able to read what the other person likes is key. You need to see if the other person likes what you're doing or dislikes what you're doing. Then you can keep up what you're doing or change up what you're doing to please the other person while also pleasing yourself. ^_~
@just_the_average_jane@xanga - was basically about to say the same thing. agree
In my opinion talent is the mix between being attentive anough to read what your partner wants, and having the knowledge of how to take what your partner wants and make the best out of it and fine-tune it to their preferences.
im aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah slave... (hehehe)
best talent: asking my partner what he likes most. he better answer.
complains: drunk and still u want to make love? duuuh? not worth. (hehe)
@thedommediaries@xanga - exactlyyyy
I think that while it is important for you to have certain "skills" the most important thing is still how two people work together.
With that being said, I like:
Aggressiveness (without being degrading)
Enthusiasm
I second the good oral :p
Willingness to try anything/creativity
Selflessness
and a good dose of naughty
Oh, and lasting more than a minute might be helpful :/
For me the best "talent" is feedback! Say what you feel...say what you like & don't like.
Dunno, don't think I've ever had sex with anyone who was good. Not that I didn't enjoy it with those people, just none of them ever made me go "wow you're good!" I have been with people who were pretty horrible though and made me regret the entire experience altogether. Just laying there doing nothing and refusing to move to different positions is just boring.
@thedommediaries@xanga - "don't space off at the wall please, that doesn't make me feel special AT ALL" - LMAO! Wow. That sentence made my day. Thanks!
I think talent really involves being thoughtful of the other person. Obviously everyone is different so some moves may work with one partner but not another. And paying attention to what feels good to the other person is great too. Also, remember there is more to people than just their genitalia, there's all kinds of "goodies" elsewhere to touch and please.
And for the record, I have NO complaints about my partner ;)
Best talent: when a guy gets off on how much he makes me get off, and when a guy can tell if something feels good or bad by how I respond. I love when guys actually take pride in making me scream because they want to do it, and I have no complaints.
Worst: not being really interested in making me feel good/selfishness. not doing things even when I specifically say "you know, I like it when you touch my clit"
Also, the last guy I dated really didn't seem to like being on top. I was on top literally 95% of the time. He said he didn't really like having to exert effort, and that's why he liked bottom. He thought the optimal sex position would be one where no one has to move.
wtf.
they have to be able to tell what's turning you on and what's not really working. Also just making sure you're both satisfied rather than just trying to get to your end.
Let's just say my boyfriend and I have this whole sex thing down and both of us get our happy ending every time =PIf I can toot my own horn for a bit, I've got splendid talents for bed...I just never get to show them off!
@blufaery@xanga - That's true! The WHOLE body is a goodie! And full of goodies!!!
Its like dancing, If you can mend you styles to someone else's almost mold and change with that person's sexual styles/ needs....then you are a good f***er
The best talent I have in bed is sleeping through a fire alarm and an earthquake for 18 hours...
@lenybobsyouruncle@xanga - FUKKIN' LOL'ED!
I am seriously average in bed. Lack of upper body stregth. Can only last 10 minutes in missionary as a result. And I'm paranoid about my small nipples. This is why I never have sex on a first date.
http://plentymorefishoutofwater.blogspot.com/ - dating blog
Bad=jack rabbits. No bueno.
Good=orgasm.
Never receive any complain from my former bed partners. Ever. I have my share of frigid females, but I know how to fire them up.