We're all extremely aware of the effects love has on people, and the different "types" of love. But sometimes, I think we can lose sight of how simple love really is, and the reasons why it becomes so complicated.
Love in itself is a simple emotion, despite the different categories. Family love, step-family love (yes, there
is can be a difference), the love of a close friend, forgiving love, sentimental love, hesitant love, unconditional love (impossible to achieve on our part, or so I believe), material love, saying-"love"-but-not-really-meaning-it-in-the-proper-context-of-the-word ("I love tacos") love, aimless love, puppy love, comrade love (dojo girls shout out), yearning love, forbidden love, hobby love. You know.
Love
When you think about it, it's situation that makes things complicated. Such as "forbidden" love. That might make things a little bit complicated. Even straightforward love between two people! Pasts, ambitions, opinions, and what people
want out of the relationship itself can make things perplexing. How fast we're moving; physically and emotionally. Where we're headed; individually and as a couple. Will I still care for you after awhile? Will you still care for me? Or will we grow tired? Do I even have time for you? How consumed are you in our relationship? Do I really want to let this person be close to me?
STOP.
What happened to the simple, "This is what I feel for you?" When did we decide to pollute that plain, elementary emotion, with adult, or semi-adult, logic? When we realized that love isn't exactly as it's put down in a fairy-tale. When we realized that the person we think we may "love" may not even "love" us back. When we realized that, simple as it is, how
BIG love is. When the epiphany came, and we saw that love can hurt. The vulnerability that comes with "real" love, and the time that it takes to experience that.
Some people will never experience love in a family sense, a friendship sense, or a partnership sense. For these people, all one can do is pray. For those of us who are blessed with the opportunity, cherish it forever. My father's mother said to him, "________, you have all these people around you who say their your friend, but when you get to be my age, you'll be able to count them on one hand." This is true. It isn't a bad thing, but your true friends are a mediocre number for a reason. I know I, at the moment, can count them on two, and I pray that over the course of my lifetime, I don't lose them and their love.
My family as broken as it is, is still full of love. I know for sure that if I see Davis, my mother, or my father, in the course of that day, I'll tell them that I love them at least once. But, love is not expressed in just words. Actions are a large portion. Honor those you love. They will honor you in return.
For me, I know being vulnerable is a difficult thing to do. I have no problems sharing my past, many people will hear about what happened a few months ago. When I'm speaking of something in my present, something that's hurting me in that moment, there are few people who will hear about that. The few on my fingers. I've become accustomed to parading around with a smile. And, I guess, by no accounts is this a false smile. It's real. I've just pushed my own problems to the back of my heart to take on everyone else's. I don't know if this is a good course of action, but it's something that's just in my nature. I have a tendency to want to fix things regardless of my emotional situation. It's not even a religious thing. I just WANT to.
But, point blank, and I think others will testify to this, at this point, the one who I truly love? Davis. I adore my little brother. I think about him the days I don't see him. We really are close. Why? I'll never know, but God blessed me with him, and I honestly have no idea who I would be without him.
Schroeder? I'm trying to let go. I guess, the more I acquaint myself with the thought of the impossibility of a relationship, as well as the fact he's l e a v i n g , the more I reduce the heartbreak that I know is inevitable. Aimless love, is definitely not the best kind.
Mah-jong. Hm. That wasn't even love over the past year. It was just awkward. It was my fault, but it was awkward.
Maman et papa? Je les aime. Bien qu'ils ne vont jamais aimer en retour.
Alors, encore, il est trop tard.
Je dois me coucher.
(Really care to read the last part? Google translator will work, I hope)
Thoughts? Who are the ones that you truly love?
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Comments (25)
um i dont know about anyone else, but when i say i love tacos, i absolutely mean it. (in every context of the word)
@cdedodgethis@xanga - I tell people I'd marry tacos.
@Fairywife@xanga - me too! if only it was legally possible... i dont need a man i need a taco- is my motto
I love my parents, because they gave up/give up so much to give me and my little sister everything we want and need.
I love my little sister, even though there are days where I absolutely, physically can NOT stand her.
I love my two best girlfriends, even on days like today when they shut themselves in their rooms and don't talk to me because they are easily annoyed and I am a rather annoying person. They always come around eventually.
& I can honestly say that I love Jason, my ex boyfriend who is also my best friend, & I probably always will. He was my first "great love" and the person I trusted more than anyone. breaking up was the best decision for us, and even though it hurts, he didn't do anything to betray my trust or give me a reason not to love him. It just needed to end.
& I too, really love tacos. Particularly the Taco Bell Cheesy Gordita Crunch <3
i love my mom and grandparents and siblings a lot, and now, i'm with someone, who i'm almost feeling it but i don't want to fight it, i want it to come naturally first.
I consider love as an action more than an emotion. But okay.
I do the same thing, parade around with a smile and try to help everyone else, even if I need help or advice. I'm a freshman in college and have alreadyrealized my large number of friends get lower and lower.. not that there is tension, just seeing who my TRUE friends are. I think vulnerablity ruins everything. Once you let someone completely in, your going to get hurt. Even if they are honest and everything they should be, you'll expect more. Love ..isn't forever. The only love I will have forever is for God, and my family. Those are the only sure things.
I truly love my immediate family. They're the best thing to ever happen to me. Right after them come my best friends, two girls and one guy; then I have an adopted aunt and uncle, a second-mother, and a whole bunch of unrelated little brothers.
the picture is BEAUTIFUL
Like you said, it's the degrees of love, whether it's for family, platonic, romantic. etc. Each has its own level and only you can factor which one is really is what it is.
i love my older sister. she's one of the people i can always count on to be there for me and back me up, and she's an amazing example of what you can do if you set your mind to it.
i love my parents. they drive me insane sometimes, but then the next minute they do something that makes me remember why i stay here and don't run away like i daydream about sometimes.
i love my friends. they keep me grounded, keep me sane, and most importantly keep me laughing.
and i love my enemies. as strange as that sounds....they're not really my enemies, but they're people i need to be cautious around, people i don't trust, don't like, and don't want to stay with or talk to any longer than is the polite minimum. i love them because they keep me on my toes, and because when i see them doing something kind for their friends, when i see them doing something mean to someone else, it reminds me that the world isn't perfect and people have their faults but they do have redeemable qualities...even if they don't show them to you personally.
also i want a taco now..
no scratch that. a quesadilla.
no wait. chocolate lava cake.
mm... =]
i was raised to understand the importance of family. granted, not everyone has a great family life, but my father always emphasized the truth that family is always there through thick and thin; they never leave, and they will always be family. whereas, the friends we make come and go; the people we thought we knew easily can become strangers. it's a rare thing to find someone to love you as family does, and it's also a wonderful thing when one does find that.
the ones i truly love are my family, a friend i've grown with since childhood, and more recently my sweet boyfriend.
i agree with your statement that love is a simple thing, it's just the circumstance that makes things complicated.
yay for love!
my best friend's nickname for me sometimes is "mother-freaking-theresa" when she's trying to be sarcastic because I have a tendency to "save" people at the sake of my own sanity and emotional health
The last part about your brother and the guy leaving is my EXACT same situation. Thanks for sharing.
I love my best friend. and even though im straight, i consider her my first great love.
I love my sisters a lot as well as my parents. especially my mom, my love for her is more special.
I was actually thinking of this topic today how we spoil the emotion of love with adult logic-- even when its needed. I don't know, what happened to wanting or dreaming of that innocent, pure love that I crave but then I rationalize with my cynicism?
i love simplicity! xP
Love this post! At the end of the day, love really is as simple as "this is what I feel for you". All complications and differences aside, that's all that really matters.
@vixen_with_a_cause@lovelyish - Agreed!
Great post! Yes I think the older we get, the more we experience life, the easier it is to forget how simple love really is. I think I really needed to read this post considering some of the things I've been going through lately. Who do I love? My family, my boyfriend, a few good friends and food. Lots and lots of food. lol
Because human being are very complicated organisms, and we as individuals have come to know this, we unconsciously strive to make things (especially emotions) as complicated as possible.
Baahah. Just kidding. I dont know what i'm saying. I actually do think i am this way though. I try to deny my humanness sometimes or wish i could be a simpler animal. But no, i have to accept the complicatedness of life and so why not make things as complicated as possible when there's the chance?!?!
I'll shut up now. It's great that you have so much love for people in your life. :)
Wow guys, thanks for responding! To tell you the truth I submitted this a long time ago and forgot about it. =D
I'm glad the post was of some help to people, and that it let people think for a second. That was really all that I was going for.
Keep loving those closest to you!
(And even the ones that aren't!)
i think love is both simple and complicated lol
love this post. I love my friends, my family
I disagree with the gist of this post. I think love is fucking complicated, but that could be because I'm too rational and love is not a rational emotion.
I don't think the levels are that easy to parse out. It was confusing with one girl I dated because there was platonic love and romantic love there, and we weren't sure how much of each it was, how to really separate out which was causing what emotion. Maybe it's more like a Venn diagram than a bunch of levels.
What I think is simple to do with love is to just let it be, and I think this point may have also have been in this post. I've found it's fairly unnecessary to figure out what kind of love it is, why you love the person, and things like that. Like you said, being analytical can take away from just enjoying the moment. And if you aren't going to enjoy love, then what can you really enjoy?
@cdedodgethis@xanga - You bitch! The tacos are mine, and you can't steal them away from me!
i agree there are different types of love. Right now, I would say the strongest types love i have are my family and my best friend. My best friend, we;ve been together like 13 yrs, we always say i wish they had best friend marriages, like to legally say that you were best friends, and we didnt need a man...well maybe later but yea, shes the true one i unconditionally love. My family too. although sometimes they do annoy the crap out of me, but at the end of the day, theyre my support system, and im grateful for it!!! and without them, iw ouldnt be who i am today.
and then id like to think that every girl thinks theyre in love with everyguy when they are dating. Ive gone thru the puppy love, the lustful love, the forbidden lustful love. lol and the reoccurring love is what keeps haunting me at present.
i really love my parents and good friends
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