So here is my question. I am transgender, as in I used to be a man and now I am a woman. I want to date men. I am too feminine for gay men to see me as anyone they would be interested in. My friends say things like, go to the straight bar then. Sounds obvious but frankly I am a little afraid of the reception I would get there. So I decided to do an informal poll. If you met a woman, liked her and then she said, "you know I used to be male" is that I deal breaker?
Share your advice at Datingish Advice:
Would you date a transgender person?
Recommend
Comments (99)
Personally, no, it's not a deal breaker for me.
but I'm a girl, and I know most guys wouldn't date a transgendered person.
Men are shallow.
Most likely not.
My Dad's actually like that. But he was born intersexed. So, I'm more open minded to things that are different from "the norm". I'm a girl (obviously), so I wouldn't have an issue with it. All that matters is the heart, you know? But people are judgmental. I hope things go well for you!
There will be guys who won't mind. Only one way to find out. Good luck!
personally, and honestly any guy could prove me wrong, but most guys might feel like they're a mite gay if they know that they are dating a transgendered person. personally for me it's not a deal breaker if the girl and i get along, but as Dommie said, most guys are pretty shallow
I have dated a transgendered person once. I was able to tell this one by looking closely at her face. It didn't matter so much to me. Some people either don't think there are true transgenders that are born as such. But you know that a guy really likes you and is willing to appreciates you enough to climb that hump or work with it, if they stay with you, after you tell them the sex.
I wouldn't date anyone else besides my fiance.
So, No.
And even if I wasn't with him.. I still probably wouldn't.
Not that I have anything against transgenders.
It takes all sorts, so I suppose there are men who'd like that kind of thing. Just like there are men who pay money for obese girls to sit on their faces. All I can say is 'good luck'.
Check out my dating blog: http://plentymorefishoutofwater.blogspot.com/
Do you look physically exactly like woman? As in do you have fake boobs and a female crotch?
Transgender can mean a couple different things so I'm just wondering.
Most guys I know have said that they wouldn't date a girl who used to be a man unfortunately. If you haven't had the complete physical transformation, I think almost all guys would not date you, and if you had the surgeries, then most would still not date you if they knew beforehand that you were transgender.
Personally I would be really averse to the thought of dating a transgender guy...I guess I'd just prefer my guy to naturally have been a guy all his life. I'm into the kind of guy who has an ego, works out, appreciates a hot chick, and likes steak and burgers - basically a mostly stereotypical guy.
I know a few years back, Seventeen magazine did an article on this. The woman (previously a man), found her boyfriend while she was still a man, and they fell in love, and he helped pay for the surgery.
There are amazing people out there! Don't give up on love.
Personally, love is love, it wouldn't matter what gender. Or transgender :)
If you met a woman, liked her and then she said, "you know I used to be male" is that I deal breaker?
Tis a dealbreaker on my behalf. I've had the situation happen before, met a transgender person we chatted and all and he dropped on me that he used to be a man. Grateful to the fact he told me, I declined and went on my way. I believe that if a person dates a transgender person who was the same sex as them, it does equate you as homosexual. Despite what operations or appearances are there. But remember this is only my belief.
It wouldn't be a deal breaker for me. If you used to be a man, and now you're a woman, your outside is just finally caught up with your inside. I feel like people fall in love with other people, not a specific gender.
I wouldn't mind dating a transgendered person. But I am a person who doesn't look at gender, race, ethnics, or any other physical trait. I look for what is on the inside and in the heart. One day, one guy, will realize he is okay with it. I'd say go for it! Be confident in yourself.
I'd give a transgendered person a chance.
I'm not a male, so my answer probably doesn't matter, but It would also depend on HOW I was given the news. I wouldn't react well to "Oh by the way I was born a woman, nice weather we're having, yes?" :/
just be yourself. trust me, i've tried everything else and it all comes down to being yourself because that's the person they'll fall in love with, not anyone else.
Most won't go for it but some are interested, you just have to look for them specifically groups that are for those kinds of people. Don't just surprise people with that hidden information at bars, you might get punched. Good luck and be safe.
uhm... i need a vag
If I weren't already committed, I'd give it a go. However, I'm not the most polarized 'straight' person and I do look kindly upon homosexuality. It's really just a matter of gender not being a huge defining characteristic, in my opinion. For example, I'm clearly a girl, but I very often think and act in a manner most common of males. Thus, gender isn't something I think of as a necessarily defining characteristic. Sometimes it is, sometimes it's not. But by no means is it necessarily always an aspect that totally defines us.
It's sure going to be hard. I think every guy who's straight wouldn't be happy with the news, but you never know.
i wouldn't. i'm sorry, but if you weren't born with your right parts i don't want to date you.
no, i like things o natural
I don't know if I would or not.
I think it'll really depend on the person but I'm going to go with that most men will not be very open to the idea. You might be better off asking friends to set you up with people, my ex-girlfriend is a pre-op MTF transexual and I knew before we started dating as we met through the local Pride club at our university. That being said getting involved in a local GLBTQ group would also be a good way to meet people that are more open to you.
It wouldnt matter to me at all.
i know this doesn't apply to me since i am female, but on the other side of the coin: yes i would (date a man who used to be female)... interested in the guys' perspective on this, though.