Wednesday, 24 February 2010
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Looking Scruffy During the Honeymoon Stage
Ever since I started dating, my friends have noticed the changes in my appearance. I have confidently shared to them that this is on purpose. After sharing with them, they named me Love Guru. I will now share with you the reason why you can afford to look scruffy at the START of a relationship.
Relationships go through many stages. The initial stage is the "Honeymoon Stage" where every day is a happy, smiley, sunny day because you know that you have acquired a newfound other half. You no longer have to face the dreadful mornings of waking up to go to work or face studies feeling unwanted and unloved because you have acquired a newfound other half. If you see a couple showing PDA (public displays of affection) or if you hear a love song, you no longer have to pine for someone because you have acquired a newfound other half.
Before you sleep at night, take a look out the window. Because let me tell you something - the moon and the stars that you see are the same moon and stars your newfound other half sees. You can sleep with a silly smile on your face because you have acquired a newfound other half.
Are you with me so far?
So in this Honeymoon Stage, while your other half is blinded with love / sun / clouds / moon / stars, use this opportunity to show your other half the downgraded version of you.
Girls, this means : wear less make-up or none, if you dare! Dress in your casual wear. Don't wear heels. Wear your glasses instead of contact lenses. Relax your diet and put on a couple of pounds.
Guys, this means : use less hair-gel, grow some stubble, workout less, let off an occasional burp.
Girls and Guys - this does NOT mean : Don't shower and stink of B.O. Please continue to brush your teeth and floss!!
Your other half will react in one of two ways :-
1. No change - This is GOOD NEWS. This means that they are so blinded in love with you that no matter what you look like downgraded, they still love you. It means that in the future, when you will eventually downgrade (i.e. cannot maintain your current youthful looks), they will still accept and love you because they have seen it before and won't be shocked when you suddenly have a bad hair/face/body day.
2. Complain - This is also GOOD NEWS. This means that they are superficially in love with you and that they will not accept the downgraded version of you. This relationship will probably end as soon as you have a bad hair/face/body day. Therefore, get rid of them before they get rid of you! You are better off without someone who gives superficial loving.
You don't believe my theory?? Take a look around today.
I bet you will see a hottie with a not-so-hottie - either :-
a) A good-looking hunky guy cuddling up to a short, fat and not-so-good-looking girl
or
b) A spotty, nerdy, lanky guy cuddling up to a hot ass girl
Once upon a time, they were both hotties, but at the Honeymoon Stage, one of them became not-so-hotty but because the other hotty half was so blinded by love, it did not matter. And they both lived happily ever after. The End.
Do you agree with this theory?
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Comments (34)
lol.
EDIT: Lol was too short of a comment. So I'll elaborate further. Your theory, I suppose, makes sense. But it seems to be common sense.
Hahaha, there's something so wrong it's right about this post.
I guess in certain ways, I'm doing this with the guy I've been seeing. I make an effort to look good, but I'm not afraid to dress down by wearing my glasses or put on sweats if it's late and we're just going to end up sleeping. He also doesn't sweat looking scruffy or wearing sweats in front of me either. I'm still undecided if it's just because we're both lazy or because we're both comfortable enough with ourselves to just let how we are normally be the way we are together.
i do this subconsciously. maybe it's just because i'm lazy?
That can't be the same girl in the pic...
I agree but this isn't really the case with me. It wasn't in my past relationship, with which I was with him for a year and a half, and the current, almost 2 years. We've both stayed the same in the current one , if not gotten better! Of course he's seen me in sweats, no make up on but with everything else it's been the same - I still dress up and always make an effort to look pretty whenever he's with me, as well as him.
We're pretty much past the honeymoon stage and we're more realistic and a lot more used to each other, but most things haven't gotten relaxed regarding looks.
I think this theory applies to older people, like people in their mid 20's and older.
@DAMN_itsz_KRYSIE@xanga - It is. It's Charlize Theron, and the right picture is a picture of her IN A ROLE. FOR A MOVIE. So I have no fucking clue why it was used here. It's obviously not relevant--especially because she played a psychotic murderer, not some love-smitten fool.
Ah, Mr. F strikes again.
This is my kind of theory.
Check out my dating blog - http://plentymorefishoutofwater.blogspot.com/
I know and have seen lots of hot girls date average or even "unattractive" looking guys, but I have never ever in my entire life seen the opposite. I don't buy this theory. I think most guys are way too superficial for that to be the case - ESPECIALLY at the beginning.
I AGREE!
True. But I choose to be dressed down most of the time. If I catch their eye during a time that I was all "dolled up", the next time or so I see them, I'm my normal self. If they stick around, cool, they're more likely a keeper.
I've had this mentality all throughout my life. It's usually only after I start dating someone more officially that I start to doll up more frequently. Kind of like the bonus prize for noticing the plain chick hiding in the shadows. Get a little extra boost every now and then. ^.^
agreed! i'm usually in my sweats or his pjs with no make up... why not be comfortable?! hahah
LOLthis is great. but this would never happen to me, because Ive never let myself go, but if the SO let himself go id really have to like to let it pass, but i wouldn't complain id just hold until i figure out another reason not to like them
I don't agree with changing or "downgrading" myself just because I can get away with looking like a slob while they're distracted, you should advertise the way you are from the beginning that way you don't have to pretend.
No one dates anyone they aren't somewhat physically attracted to, it's just the nature of the beast. You can get away with doing that during the honeymoon stage but your "changes" might come up as a huge fight when you get to the "we're-going-to-fight-about-everything-everyday" stage.
the theory is sound. however, the application of the theory to an unrelated observation at the end is not.
I agree it happens shortly after the honeymoon stage, or towards the end of the honeymoon stage.
I also wouldnt think of it as a downgrade, but just being more comfortable with yourself!
personally as a guy, ( maybe a really weird one xD )
i like seeing girls with out make-up, i like seeing girls wear sneakers, i dont like highheels,
and i love it when a girl is wearing those square glasses. lol so what does that make me?
insane? xD
and what if they were friends prior to being lovers?
if i was seeing a dude and it was during this "moneymoon" phase, and he decided to dress sloppy and what not, i would feel a little bummed out, just because it seems like he's not taking the initiative to impress me, and gives me an "i don't care" kind of vibe.
and i agree with not_izzy@xanga lol
love it. so true. i never went out of my way for my husband & weve been together 8.5 yrs, no matter what i wear, what i weigh, or how i do my hair, he loves me just the same. :)
I do understand, oddly enough haha :)
If you really loved one another, you'd look past your appearances.
Haha, I get it, but I feel like getting all nice and ready for your other half shows that you care. So I agree with kerryabag@xanga.
But it's fine to have your off days :]
I guess it makes sense...as a test.
I think its important to always look your best when you're with
someone. I slacked off a little bit during the honeymoon stage and my
boyfriend thought I didn't care about him as much because I would only
get dressed up and pretty when I was going out lol.
@DAMN_itsz_KRYSIE@xanga - I
know it! I can't believe how different she looks. But, have you ever
seen Monster? That's what the less attractive pic is from, it's a
pretty awesome movie.
I think it's different if you meet that certain someone at the gym. Unless, the woman goes to the gym with make-up and contacts which I sometimes do because I'm too lazy to wash it off before I leave.
And I do and don't agree with your argument. I mean, I don't wanna gain a few pounds just to test the guy. Plus, those "opposites" were probably attracted to each other through personality (hopefully) and not necessarily looks.