Sunday, 14 February 2010

  • Single Dads and Dating

    I've been a single father since my daughter was six months old, she is eight years old now. Her mother left both of us and I have been raising her alone ever since.



    Now that I've shown where I am coming from, let me get to my point.

    I've heard from many people, male and female, that it must be easy for single fathers to get women. This, in my case, is definitely not true. I have had a good number of women reject me because because I was a single father. In one case, a single mother didn't want to date me because date me because I was a single mother.

    I just wanted to write this that it's not only single mothers who have harder times finding dates, single fathers do as well.

    What are your thoughts on single dads and dating?

Comments (19)

  • PMFoutofwater

    No thoughts except to say respect to you and yours. Good luck bro.
    http://plentymorefishoutofwater.blogspot.com/

  • grumpybear1978@xanga

    Being a former single mom myself, it shouldn't come down to whether or not you have kids for compatibility.  If they like you, then it all will fall into place.  It did for me.  It does take more effort.  Just keep on the road you are on and the right one will fall into your lap when you least expect it.  

  • WhenHateIsTheOnlyOption@xanga
    I stink...

    It's hard but hang in there. When you meet someone that will accept you and your children, you'll know that-that person is the one. Or maybe you'll meet another single parent and your family and hers will combine and become the Brady Bunch!

  • monke_man

    @WhenHateIsTheOnlyOption@xanga - life rarely works out that conveniently.


    sorry man, you're stuck being miserable for a long ass while longer.
  • somewhat_damaged_14@xanga

    @monke_man - seems to be the more realistic outlook

  • CookinKat26@xanga

    I would not have a problem dating a single father. You have to learn to balance the time with your daughter and that special someone.

  • mistermino@xanga

    Women no matter the age never want to be 2nd on the list for your affection/attention.
    *just a generalization but may be the ultimate cause of why it's difficult for you.

  • SlackerSociety@xanga

    I'd figure if you met up with a single mom, you would just Brady Bunch the whole things, but I assumed wrong.

  • disorderedpersonality@xanga

    You just need to find a woman who isn't so stuck on herself being #1 in your world. It'll probably be tough, but when you do find her, it'll be worth the wait. Personally I love kids and hope to work with them in some setting, so for me a single dad isn't an automatic deal-breaker, as long as he loves his child.

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  • LilMisha@xanga

    I never really thought it would be hard for single dads.  I have been a single mom before and I know just how hard it is.  I could talk to a guy all night long and as soon as the fact that I had a kid came up, they were history.  I think it is awesome that you are caring for your daughter yourself.  <3

  • Honey14

    i've personally never rejected a guy because he was a single father, and one of my good friends is a single dad.  i respect the fact that, in a society that caters more to single women with children than men, they are responsible and caring when it matters most.

  • P0RCELA1N_D0LL@xanga

    if he has a crazy baby mama always coming into the picture, then I'll pass. if he doesn't have the extra drama, then I'll think about it if he was super hot. like single moms, single dads often show that they have accountibility and strong independence. these are appealing characteristics but everything else factors in, such as chemistry/personality.

  • somewhat_damaged_14@xanga

    @P0RCELA1N_D0LL@xanga - lol, no "baby mama" drama for me, my ex-wife lives a thousand miles away and barely comes here

  • thinfriendxxo@xanga

    The only problem I can see with a single dad - is the kid's mother.  Since your ex is totally out of the picture I don't see what the problem could be.  Personally (and this applies to the guy I'm seeing) the fact that you love your kid and are doing the best you can for her is pretty sexy.  I know that when I look at my guy and the way his face lights up when he talks about them...  I just want to jump him then and there.  The two downfalls for me that I have to come to terms with are (a) the ex who won't let go and (b) the fact that he doesn't want anymore kids. 

  • Salivarysatisfaction

    I had a fuckbuddy once who was a single dad. I didn't want to get serious with him because I never want to be a parent myself. I know that's a "years down the road, you should focus on the here and now bla bla bla" but it's a legitimate concern for any single girl who doesn't want kids...EVER. Plus, I'm sure a year down the road I would have had to meet his son and I would have been terribly awkward (read:bad with kids). That's why I kept it casual.

  • LilMisha@xanga

    I agree with thinfriendxxo@xanga  I think the fact that you are caring for your daughter yourself is hot.  It shows responsibility and committment.  I have no time for immautre men.

  • xDreamXHeartx@xanga
    I feel you...

    hey I have kinda the same problem. single mother, 24/IL, w/ the most beautiful & wonderful 3 y/o sweetest daughter ne1 could ever ask for. she always brightens my day, makes me smile/laugh as if she always knows whenever I'm upset. and if she "senses" something, she'll ask me "r u ok mommy" (tearing up inside) but I tell her "yeah mommy's ok thanx hun" n I give her a big hug n kiss, just for caring. anyway, I have the same tuf problems too. but it's not really cuz I'm a single mom. it's all cuz they just want my body n not me. they all do/say the same crap everytime, but really in reality, unknown to me, they're playing me. like a fool/another pawn for their lil game/something. and it hurts like even worse than the last time. this has happened my whole life....and along w/ other life tragedies I've been thru as well. so I know what u're going thru, it's hard to find someone that will actually "stick w/ u" no matter what.....and me & my ex (her dad) have PT custody of her rite now, til I'm able to move out n get our own place, hopefully wana get FT custody w/ her. but for now, it's every other 2 weex. but at least I get a break. (when I was w/ her dad, I was always the one taking care of her/raising her) I'm NOT complaining at all, I was just saying why it's nice to have a break sometimes. and when she's here w/ me, I don't "go out on dates/flings/whatever" cuz it's like taking time away from her. when in reality, they all "stand me up"/turn  me down, everytime anyway. so I pretty much gave up. when Angela's here, I try to spend as much of all my love n attention w/ her as I possibly can, hence not using internet much. but when she's not here, it's like I'm a different person. bored & lonely, and like today, that's what I'm doing (rite now she's w/ her dad) so I'm just bored & lonely by myself for now.......so I was just telling u my story, to let y'know it's not just like that for u either, others r "suffering" as well.......but I wish the best of luck for u, that u can "find the one" (whoever/where ever she maybe)......but once it happens, and u KNOW, don't hold back/let go......happy new year, God Bless & God Speed, g'luck! ~*Love, Michelle*~

  • coralcwayla@xanga

    Well good luck, I know for me, I like dating single dad's they tend to be more mellow and less likely to go out and drink, and also less likely to sleep around.


    I find it really cool when a guy steps up like that, and I start out knowing that he's someone who can be trusted just because the choices in his life are really up front in a lot of ways.


    On the flip side though my ex was a single dad and turned out to be a bit of a 'lady's man' he was nice and treated me well, but he ended up with his kid through a hook up, and it turned out that even though he had mellowed, he still wanted something closer to the hook up then a LTR.

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