Wednesday, 10 February 2010
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Question of the Day: Infidelity
Is mental infidelity better or worse than physical infidelity? And does the answer to this question differ between the genders?
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Comments (41)
To be honest I think they're both as bad as each other. I wouldn't want to be with someone who wanted someone else. But if I had to pick I'd rather someone physically cheat on me with someone they didn't have a lot of feelings for. x
I guess mental infidelity is worse. I think I could forgive physical infidelity ( protected infidelity) because it can happen idk. But my guy falling for someone else and not even talking me about it, that's unforgiveable.
Both are equally as worse. Same thing, different way.
No, mental infidelity is nowhere near as bad. Temptation is natural and doesn't stop when you're with someone. And I often think of other women when I'm fannyrubbing a girl.
http://plentymorefishoutofwater.blogspot.com/
There is no mental infidelity. If the bastard sticks his dick in some other chick cut his cock off or feed him arsenic. Or dump him.
If the chick is unfaithful sew her vag up with dental floss and feed her to the sharks. Or dump her.
Well... It depends on how you describe mental infidelity. If really being interested in another person counts, then no. Sometimes you meet someone, you talk to them, and you just think, "WOW, there's chemistry." You can't help thinking that, you can't help if you naturally feel attracted to a person.
The cheating for me starts happening when you stop having self-control. Mentally as same as physically--You like the person, but you keep your distance from them so that a more intimate bond doesn't form, same way you find someone attractive, but you keep your distance from them so that you don't do anything with them.
Both forms of cheating show a lack of commitment to your SO and lack of self-control. I think it depends on how far it went in both situations, as to which is worse, but they both are fucking bullshit, and noone should take either from anyone. If someone commits to you in a relationship, they are committing their love and their body to you. No exceptions. And if they don't want that anymore, they should break up with you instead of making you hurt because of their indecisiveness--that's just selfish.
@ShimmerBodyCream2@xanga - Don't hold back, love...
They differ for either sex.
But both are pretty shitty.It matters. Honestly, I don't want to know if someone has sex with someone else (cheating on me) if it's a one time mistake and they don't have feelings for the person. It doesn't really affect the relationship (provided no STDs).
However, what is more important, is if someone has feelings for another person, or less feelings for me. In this case, it's probably time to end the relationship, regardless of whatever sex does or does not happen.
As for gender issue, I don't think it's dependent on gender.
I've somewhat wondered if mental infidelity is the cause of physical. You first get the feelings, thoughts, ideas about another person then you act on them.
@PMFoutofwater - You wish I was your love. Have fun bangin big Bertha.
if by mental infidelity, you mean being in love with another person while claiming to be monogomaous and in love with your partner, i'd consider that worse than physical infidelity.
but if "mental infidelity" just means eyeing someone and thinking sexual thoughts, that's not bad at all.
i'd rather my boyfriend eyefuck a stranger than sleep with her, but i'd rather him sleep with her (sans emotions, and only one) than be in love with her. meh.
what's meant by "mental infidelity" exactly. if its just being sexually attracted to someone other than your partner then how can you even compare the two? attraction towards others is natural, its how you handle it that counts.
@astrellia - Agree wholeheartedly.
I think I'd be more devastated if my boyfriend stayed with me even though he has feelings for somebody else.
I think it depends on why you are with the person in the first place. If it's because they're beyond hot and the sex is amazing, I'd imagine a physical infidelity would be worse. If it's because you feel like you have a mental connection with the other person, I would say an emotional infidelity would be worse.
But FOR ME, if the physical aspects of the relationship are more important than the emotional ones, it's just a fuck buddy relationship and we aren't really together anyway. Emotional infidelity means the relationship is OVER; he has feelings for someone else, there's no point in even staying together anymore. Physical infidelity means he doesn't have much self-control.
@ShimmerBodyCream2@xanga - holy crap, holy crap. I wish I could say more but wow.
I think this is a sex division thing. I think males don't too often think about other women beyond the hibbidy dibbidy, so for them I think the physical is worse. For women I believe they extrapolate an entire life around the fantasy and that is a very damaging. So acting for men is worse and thinking for women is worse.
guys get more upset over physical infidelity
girls get upset over emotional infidelityboth suck.
I'm not sure if you mean emotional infidelity by mental infidelity, as in being in love with another person but not being physically intimate.
But if you are talking about emotional infidelity, then it's pretty much accepted through studies that women dislike emotional infidelity more than physical infidelity, and men dislike physical infidelity more than emotional infidelity.
They're both just as bad.
physical is SO much worse because if they still "love" you, they clearly are a complete asshole since they knowingly hurt you (it doesn't happen as a five second accident... please), they show a complete disrespect for you as a person, completely self-centered only focusing on their own needs... honestly, just have the strength to say it before you do it.
On the other hand, mental (or emotional) while it would SUCK... it's not really something you can prevent... if people just fall out of love and someone else starts to catch is interest... it sucks for you buy obviously there was some dis-function and most of us know we don't really choose who we love... we can work at it but sometimes it's just not there
this is really general. what counts as "mental infidelity," just checking out another guy/girl or being in love with another guy/girl?
who doesnt have fantasies?
i could be married and still dream about george clooney
I am one of those RARE people (rare-er now days) that think that infidelity, is infidelity no matter WHAT package in comes in, physical, mental, etc... I wouldn't date anyone who looked at porn, I wouldn't date anyone who had a history of cheating, etc etc... because you are dating me? You are MINE and vise versa. IMHO, if you want to have random relationships, or have porn for a buddy every other night, STAY SINGLE! What do you need ME for?
Anyways, I am with someone who is (luckily) very open and honest with me. To answer the question - physical is worse for US beause we were both virgins when we were married. (SHOCKING I know) if he actually SLEPT with someone else? I think our relationship wouldn't be able to last because what we've done together (with no one else) would just be too hard to get through (and he knows this)... just my two cents.
www.lisaslittleluxuries.etsy.com