Wednesday, 10 February 2010
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Little Red Riding Whore: Not Just for the Big Bad Wolf
Because I am wise beyond my years, and also because I'm still a little slutty, my girlfriends often call me for relationship advice. So imagine my delight when my girlfriend, Kim, called to tell me she had stumbled upon her boyfriend's porn stash. Admittedly, I think the old 'wah my boyfriend looks at porn' song and dance is a bit tired. Yes, your boyfriend probably does look at porn. But this wasn't just any porn. This was Little Red Riding Whore.
I won't lie. My initial reaction was to burst out laughing and make a mental note to download it (for research purposes, of course!). "It's not that I'm opposed to him looking at porn, but Little Red Riding Whore? It's like he's a pedophile or something! It's not realistic" Kim wails. Yeah, no shit. It's not supposed to be realistic. Who's going to watch a 'porn' where the bleached blonde vixen is really just a disgruntled girlfriend who is sick and tired of picking up her boyfriend's wet towels off the floor, and the well endowed dude finishes after a mere 3 minutes and quickly returns to playing World of Warcraft?
I try and make this point with her, but Kim won't budge, "Jessica, I'm sorry, but fairy tale porn is not normal! Why can't he watch a porn with, I don't know, a boyfriend and girlfriend having sex?" Please, it is porn. Not a Nicholas Sparks movie. People don't watch it in the hopes that the main characters will get married, buy a house and have 2.5 children together. You're never going to hear anyone say, "I knew I wanted to marry you when you let me jizz on your best friends face during that one orgy we had." Besides, it could be worse. He could skip the porn entirely and ask you for a blow job.
So what do you think? Was Kim making a big deal over nothing? What advice would you give her?
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About the Author
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- From: BecknCallGrl@xanga
- About Me: Your boyfriend thinks I'm prettier than you.
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Comments (97)
lols
lol. That made me laugh, can't help it.
Porn isn't realistic. That's what my husband says makes it appealing. No, you don't want to have sex with those girls. If you did...you'd feel really uncomfortable watching it, no?
Hell, I'd download Little Red Riding Whore because it sounds absolutely hysterical. I would probably make my husband watch it too.
From experience with people the only time guys look at porn while they're in a relationship is either a) out of boredom [dont we all?] b) they're not getting enough action from their girl so they resort to a little boob and lube. c) they already chronically watched porn pre-relationship so the habit didn't decrease just because their sex life increased.
The only time you should really worry is if your boyfriend is watching porn ALLTHETIME or is comparing you to a porn star. "Why wont you do what she did?" "Why wont you let me put it on your ass like on that video?" etc.
I mean, how do you know he wasn't watching the porno out of curiosity or boredom?
I think it's hilarious.
But if she isn't going to ask him herself, she at least owes him the benefit of the doubt. Maybe it was a gift?
Unless it looks like he filmed it himself at or around the nearest middle school, there really is no reason to raise a red flag.
You're never going to hear anyone say, "I knew I wanted to marry you when you let me jizz on your best friends face during that one orgy we had."
bahahaha
Yeah, you're friend is making a big deal over nothing. Porn is a fantasy and escape for people. I mean, do nurses really fuck their patients like they do in the pornos? nope.
By the first sentence alone, I knew that it was you writing this.
Porn isn't a big deal. Although some fetishes should raise an eyebrow [like if he wants to rape 12 year olds], little red riding whore isn't a big deal. It's normal.
LOL :) i used to be like that. but now i use porn as an amusement to when im bored with nothing to do. i don't even masturbate. i just watch & laugh lol :D
lol; that sounds tempting, but no thanks. kids, say no to drugs.
Ha, fairytale porn. xD
I think it's fine. I think the only time porn is "not normal", is when it starts to affect your life.
Me or the porn. that's the deal i would make, and did make. it turned out to be me. he burned all the porn, and hasn't looked at it since.
LIttle Red Riding Whore actually sounds like a cool video. Maybe i'll get my boyfriend to watch it with me. lol
This reminds me of the time my buddy accidentally rented the 'Bare Wench Project.'
lmao please keep blogging, you're hilarious.
<3Ali
"Who's going to watch a 'porn' where the bleached blonde vixen is really just a disgruntled girlfriend who is sick and tired of picking up her boyfriend's wet towels off the floor, and the well endowed dude finishes after a mere 3 minutes and quickly returns to playing World of Warcraft?"
bahahaa
Just be glad he's not into the Furry scene or gay porn or animal bestiality or old people porn or the COUNTLESS other porn out there that "isn't normal"
She def overrated. She should surprise him by dressing up as Red Riding Whore. ;]
lol. that is funny. little red riding whore.
i don't think it's worse than any other porn, i mean they're all just fantasies.
fantasies > reality
also a BF and GF having sex isn't really arousing. it is like... the same as dating... why get a duplicate of something you already have?
I think she's just hurt or jealous by the fact and is trying to hide it by saying he's looking at something weird. And she should be made aware that it could get way weirder. And lol at 2.5 kids.
hahaha youre absolutely right, i would laugh in her face, come on, whats the harm in sexual fantasies? its completely normal.
"Besides, it could be worse. He could skip the porn entirely and ask you for a blow job. "
I LOL'd. nice.
big deal over nothing.
she should just be glad it wasn't gay porn. lol then she would have actual problems to deal with.
Actually that last part isn't true there was one movie where the girl showed up at the end and said "I knew you were the one the second I sat on your cock" and they lived happily ever after.
probably the best post on datingish to date
Completely making Way to big a deal outta it, personally I'd steal it from him :p