Thursday, 04 February 2010
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Wedding "Date"
Alright. So my good friend is getting married in March. W00T!!.. But wait... Now I needed a date for this wedding. This is the first wedding that i am EVER attending. I don't know about you guys but, I do NOT want to go to this wedding dateless. While the rest of my friends all have their girlfriends obviously as there dates. I just figured it wouldn't be a good look, for me to go solo. So now I had to find a date to this wedding.
After months and months of seeing if I met someone new to take. I still had no one. My last options were to just take one of my good close lady friends. Which I'm sure I would have fun but it just wouldn't be the same. So now I invited one of my good lady friend's friend. I always had a crush on her and she said she would go. *shrug* Better than nothing right? But here is the catch... She said she would go, and I'm pretty sure she knows that I am attracted to her and would like to date her. She is probably going with me just as a friendly gesture. But in my mind, I kind of think of it as like a little date.Is this wrong? Should I go into this wedding with the alternative objective of trying to get to know her and vice versa. Or should I just leave it alone and just go as if we are just friends?
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- From: Mouse036@xanga
- Name: Mouse
- Location: New York, United States
- About Me: What up. Im 25 from Westchester NY. I dont got much to say bout myself but umm. Not good at really explaining myself on these, so feel free to just ask... AIM: Damouse750
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Comments (22)
no it's not wrong. and if she's a friend, what do you mean by "with the alternative objective of trying to get to know her"? shouldn't you already know her?
Supposedly, females can FEEL if you have alterior motives (not proven but many females I know states it's true) so if you go to the wedding with an alterior motive she'll "sense" it and be repulsed or rather be unnatural. So go with the feel just as friends since it'll make it more comfortable to both you and her. Of course at the same time, don't make yourself too friendly that she puts you into the dreaded FRIEND ZONE!
That's just my take....whether you agree or not. =X
Take care!~
I think your objective should be hanging out and getting to know her, but not necessarily approaching it as a date. You don't want to overestimate the situation, but you also should make sure to make a good impression so that maybe she can see that you're a cool guy (and maybe impress her on the long term).
But that's just me. There are many ways to interpret the situation...
@deathtemplar@xanga - yes :P
Go as friends, have fun, and see what happens later. :P
Go expecting nothing...in a sense. Just go planning on having fun, and enjoying yourself, and see where things go with her. She probably does see it as you just inviting her as a friend - because honestly a wedding isn't really a date, per say, there's too many other things going on, and you weren't invited so you could bring a date, you were invited to help celebrate your friend's big day. It's just something that you bring a date to, for whatever reason. Don't worry, I'm sure you'll have fun, and your "date" will enjoy herself. Just make sure she doesn't feel uncomfortable not knowing anyone - if that's the case.
can't you go as friends and still have the objective of "getting to know her"? i mean, i necessarily go in hoping for a first kiss or anything, but you can be her friend and still be interested- the two aren't mutually exclusive. and even if you were just friends you'd be getting to know her better!
Man, you are so wrong about this whole thing. Of course you can go dateless. Weddings are the best places ON EARTH to pull. All the single girls will be so envious of the bride that their standards instantly drop.
http://plentymorefishoutofwater.blogspot.com/
@PMFoutofwater - So true.
@atmaster@xanga - Think he said she was a friends friend, so probably knows her, but not very well.
I'd say just go assuming it's just as friends, but never hurts to try to get to know her better at the same time. Watch and see how she takes it, she might be thinking the same thing as you "Is this a date? Or is he just needing a friend?"
You could just go single and meet someone there. That's the one big thing about going to weddings - always plenty of single girls (and usually a good amount of guys too).
But I say just go into it as friends, have some fun, and if something else develops, great!
@PMFoutofwater - probably the only comment I've seen from you that I actually agree with. LOL
Being dateless can kind of suck.
My friend got married on my 20th birthday last year. I was in the wedding party and I was paired up with the bride's gay friend to walk down the aisle. So that was a slightly depressing way to start my second decade, walking down the aisle with a gay man not to mention the girl my friend was going to set me up with showed up with another guy.
go as a bachelor and maybe you'll meet a cute bridesmaid there
@JusticeCho@xanga - oops totally missed that.
and i agree with most everyone. why treat going as friends and getting to know her more as separate entities?
either go as friends or just go dateless. it's more fun to go dateless cause you might just meet someone there.
Just go as friends that are gonna have a good time & see how you get along & take it from there .Good luck
.
If she suspects that you like her and she's still willing to go with you, maybe she likes you too. And maybe she wants it to be a date. Afterwards, when you take her home, tell her you had fun and would like to go out again sometime. She should let you know then if she's only interested in being friends.
@Covergirl_For_Sanity_Fair@xanga - @American_woman_USA@xanga - @mewithoutu77@xanga - @atmaster@xanga - @P0RCELA1N_D0LL@xanga - @Sgt_Pepper13@xanga - @Dustin_wind@xanga - @Morningstarrising@xanga - @JusticeCho@xanga - @makerm7@xanga - @PMFoutofwater - @JennyGee@xanga - @thegirlwiththecamera@xanga - @ELIZerson@xanga - @nodnarbassoon@xanga - @deathtemplar@xanga - @atmaster@xanga - Yeeea.. Im going to go as friends definetly.. And see where it goes... I think its going to be a fun time. However the day turns out.. Ill keep you all posted... Tell you what happens haha.. And i dont agree with the whole go single thing and get a brides made. This is a VERY italian wedding im going to. I'd rather NOT take my chances with a solo mission to it lol
Didn't say how long you knew her or how well. If it's clear that things have always been just platonic, don't push it.
But if the option is there or she's sending any signals... Sir, spit game. Why waste the opportunity?
Go as friends and take this opportunity to get to know her; you could also send her some signals that you like her. From then, you'll know what to do next...
Either go by yourself (weddings are expensive for the the party-giver) and have fun and mingle with others or go with her as a friend. When you have super-high expectations on looking for a mate at an event will surely end up as a not-very-fun party! People who are happy and having fun will generally attract other people. So...have fun!
JUst be a gentleman, get to know her, let her get to know you, show her a good time, introduce her PLEASE and don't leave her on the side, and just have fun. You'll know and feel what will happen next.