Sunday, 31 January 2010
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A Virgin Feeling Superior?
As a virgin, I always seem to notice how virgins are considered losers, and once in a while I’ll tend to hear about how someone is such a slut. Both terms are used so negatively but being as I’m a virgin I don’t seem to see both sides all the time. It bothers me that people act this way so I went out to hear other people’s thoughts on the matter, and one quote caught my attention.
“Being a virgin is cool as long as you don’t think your superior to people who choose to lose it.”
I’m sure a lot of people will agree with this quote but the reason it caught my attention is simply because I’ve never heard of a virgin feeling superior. I myself have never felt like a better, or more ethical, person for being a virgin. As I continued thinking about this I realized the majority of people are extremely immature about the subject and that’s what causes this negativity.
“Slut” and “Virgin” are just titles people are given based on their personal choices. People believe they are mature enough to make choices about their sex lives yet they resort to name calling when others make a different choice. This is a choice most people have to make and shouldn’t people try to feel proud of the choices they make. It is good to know that there are people here on Xanga that feel comfortable enough to comment on how many sex partners they’ve had without worrying about what other people say…It’s just a shame that some people feel the need to insult others. People need to grow up.
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- From: CakeGuy@xanga
- Name: CakeGuy
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Comments (106)
Tehe jk. I've never heard of virgin as an insult like that, but maybe as like "you'll be a virgin until you're fifty" does that count? Lol
That is true. We try to hurt each other with words (and it works). I think, too, that people do that because they feel insecure. I don't lord it over people. Virginity is what it is, no need to make a big deal about it.
Some people are haters.
I hear Issac Newton was a virgin. I'm starting to think he was asexual [or he just had NO GAME whatsoever ... or maybe he was gay]. My point is, he got a lot of shit done by not concentrating on sex, if he was asexual.
Trufax. What other people do or don't do in their bedrooms is none of our business. Who cares if someone's had no partners or had over 100? It ain't your sex life!
the only people i feel superior to are the ones making these kinds of statements:
“Being a virgin is cool as long as you don’t think your superior to people who choose to lose it.”"people need to grow up" people never grow up, either you are mature, or you arn't. no impartial thing like time (or a significant other) will change you unless you let it.
rather than saying some BS about how the world should be. say why 'they are wrong', and prove that your world view is more benifitial.
The thing(s) you're describing (about what a shame the negativity and labeling and disrespect is and how we shouldn't stoop to that level)-- is just common sense and courtesy.
Yet, it's dismally uncommon.
Some of the virgins (well actually all of them) do think they are better and morally superior to me because they didnt "give into temptation". They think they are above it and constantly remind me of my failure. ~sigh~ Whatever. You can sit on your high horse alone.
whether or not you like it, after your freshman year of college, if you're still a virgin, you will be judged (for the worse). it's better to keep it to yourself.
it's not a social standard i approve of, but it's not going to change anytime soon.
I dont think all virgins are like this obviously, I know I wasnt. Just the reception Ive got the past few years, especially in college.
@lenybobsyouruncle@xanga - only if their world view is falsifiable. else, there's no point in wasting your time. not everyone in this world is open-minded.
i think what they meant was how sometimes virgins, often the religious ones, will bash semingly everyone who's had sex. but yea, people shouldn't be judged on whether they've had sex or not. just let the idiots be idiots and lose it whenever you feel ready.
I'm a sophomore in college and I honestly could not give one flying fuck what people think of me for being a virgin. And no, I'm not "saving it for my wedding night" or a sacrificial ritual involving thirteen more virgins, ten dead Druids, the summoning of a Sea Goat god or whatever the fuck else people seem to be needing a reason for these days.
People always ask me for my excuse. I don't have any specific reason, but they're always suprised, (because I don't act like one?!). I smoke, I drink, I gamble, I swear, I pick fights, and I look like hell without makeup, but that's it. Just 'cos I didn't throw myself at the closest dude in high school doesn't make me stuck up or religious, but at the same time, I never feel inferior.
I agree. I hate virgins who act like they're superior & I hate when people who choose to have sex try to make people like me feel bad for waiting. Your personal life choices dont make you better or worse than the next person.
very true.
@wise man - lol as you have noticed i'm fairly closed minded. but as for falsifiable; if the idea isn't falsifiable it hold no value, and might as well be false. :p
but maybe that is just cause i'm an evil person >:D
I completely agree.
I feel glad to be a virgin, as I'm still young and I haven't given into pressure when I wasn't ready at all. But I don't regard myself to be superior because it's a personal choice. If someone wants to give up their virginity, that's their own choice, and not for anyone else to judge.
critising people's virginity is just like people back in the highschool lol
I totaly agree with you. People need to grow up.
No need to feel inferior or superior, That is unecessary. The thing is to just feel confortable with our own choices.
In our society, VIRGINITY is a four letter word.
I totally agree. Good post!
@TheNotoriousGOD@xanga - I am a virgin in my second year of college and no one that knows about it judges me negatively for it. It's not because I can't lose it or that I have such high morals that make me better than everyone else, I just haven't found the right guy yet that I feel comfortable enough to have sex with. Those that judge others just because they have completed one year of college and still haven't lost their virginity are ignorant. I would rather be judged for being a virgin than for being a slut anyways.
@FairyTalesAndWhiskey@xanga - I completely agree with you! I have heard responses like "I can't believe you go out and party and stuff but are still a virgin!" Like those two things go hand in hand. I chose to party, drink, and do other things which might be looked down upon by some, but I chose not to have sex. It's just not something I feel like I am ready for until I've met the right person. I only have a couple of other friends who are also virgins, most of them are not and I don't look at them any differently. It's just a life choice, it doesn't make you better or worse than anyone else.
In my Chinese Philosophy class, one way to look at being a virgin is that you hold the power. Men always want to get a girl's virginity in the view that it is a for of a chi. So, think of yourself in control. :)