Friday, 29 January 2010
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Who Are You Today?
I have a guy in my class who's hilarious, attractive, and very sweet, though he tries to hide it. Rick is in all my classes save one, so we've become pretty good friends. He's been acting like he's interested in me, and while I'm flattered, I'm concerned that I only see one side of him. Sometimes, Rick can be rude and say shallow things, but he usually laughs and assumes me he's kidding when I tell him what I think of the words that just came out of his mouth. But that's not the only problem; some of his close friends I've "stalked" on Facebook, and I'm kind of appalled.
The two girls have entire albums of her drinking, being stoned, and being semi-inappropriate with guys. I read some of the comments on one of the photos and discovered that one of them is on probation for smoking weed, etc. While he's not in any of those photos, he has to know about them. Does that mean he's involved in this kind of crap, or that he condones it? I certainly don't. I may be attracted to him, but if he's like that.... No thank you. However, I don't want to judge him without any legitimate proof...
Am I being ridiculous, or should I be concerned? Have you ever felt like you only ever saw one side of a person?
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About the Author
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- From: just_me_again_down_here@xanga
- About Me: Hello:) I'm here to express what I can't say to those around me, make valid points about things going on today, and hopefully share a little of Christ's love. Constructive criticism is appreciated. Feel free to add me:)
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Comments (20)
You can never know a person by the surface they give off. Digging deeper is unwise because we'll mix together, I've found, though if you're experienced then you probably already know the answer by the surface.
If you'd like to interfer, then say something like that he's wasting his potential or something.
You are not wrong to be concerned. All of us have many faces we present to the world. Part of developing friendships is meeting the different sides of a person. I don't think it can hurt much to take the time to get to know him a bit better outside the classroom. I have to admit the evidence you have so far isn't promising but it's also not much to go on.
Don't want to be mean but I didn't follow any of that...
http://plentymorefishoutofwater.blogspot.com/
The kinds of people someone associates himself with always give at least a small window into who he is, but that's up to you to figure out. A person could hang out with low lifes because he has always felt the need to have someone to take care of, or he could hang out with low lifes because he is one.
Give him a chance, but make sure you get to know exactly why he hangs out with that type of person.
@PMFoutofwater - Me neither. [Btw, great post-date post! :D ]
To the poster, I'm very much against smoking pot / cigarettes and I'm ok with people drinking as long as it's within limits [like my boyfriend has his own mini wine cellar and buys English and Irish scotch and stuff but he drinks to taste, not to get wasted]. I have plenty of friends who are potheads and they know how I feel about it, and don't try to peer pressure me - they can't even if they wanted to - and so I guess what I'm trying to say is that just because he has bad friends doesn't mean he's just like them.
Go with your instincts and tread carefully. The best way to get to know someone is to offer your friendship and your ear while sticking to your own personal boundaries. You're gut won't deceive you. Just remember that we can't change other people, no matter what their "potential" is or what they "could" be.
Why don't you just ask him? Go out on a lunch date and just talk. Easiest way to find out something about someone is to just freakin' ask.
@Cest_LaxVie@xanga - Glad you liked it
You've definitely got reason to be concerned; I knew a guy like that in high school. Guys have a huge capacity to be manipulative, just as much as anyone else. If he's involved with these kinds of people -- especially if they're his best friends -- then it's pretty likely he partakes, because activities like that are easy to hide from other people -- in this case, you -- if they're smart about it. Still, though, it's possible that he doesn't condone those things. Either way, the best you can do is to pay close attention. Or, ask. Never be afraid to be up-front.
birds of a feather flock together
Be fairly concerned, but its okay to continue getting to know him. Just don't lead him on straight off the bat.
Who knows. Some people take a while to open up completely. It's not always a bad thing.
talk to the man. stop stalking lol..
Just ask him about it.
It's not a bad thing to be concerned but before totally writing him off maybe hang out with him once or twice and then make your decision.
Don't be a hater.
If someone smokes weed they'll generally just tell you.
Whats wrong with a bit of partying? And what did the Cannibus ever do to you?
Do not assume things about ppl. Define him yourself. Dang I hate when people assume the worst of others.
Yeah, try not to jump to any conclusions.
shut up virgin.
Follow YOUR instincts.
@lil_KyungMin@xanga - True True THAT SON!