Thursday, 28 January 2010
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Jealously Isn't Always a Bad Thing
The first thing that people associate with the word "jealously" is always something bad..
TOO much jealously is bad; and in the cases of many, ends a relationship. But a just a little bit can keep one going.
When a person says to me that they are jealous (of what?) it confirms their interest in me. It's another way to let you know, "I still like you", without actually being told "I...still like you". I don't take the implied stigma that jealously is always bad and they have no reason to feel that way. If people would think about it a bit more, it'd makes sense to them.
Can you be jealous of someone that you just met? If you're really feeling a person, you will if there is a possibility of someone else. Aside from folks I won't mention; we're inherently selfish and we do what is good for us first, others second.
Jealously also gives the person that answer they may have been looking for. However; if you were communicating your feelings in the first place, you wouldn't have this problem.
So as it being a not so bad thing as a wake up call. As I stated, too much of it will cause a relationship to falter, but just the right amount can keep it together...
Do you agree?
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- From: dpisawesome
- Name: Andrew
- About Me: you can either get mad now, or after i finish talking...
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Comments (37)
Absolutely. A healthy does of jealousy is an essential part of a romantic relationship. But too much/too little can help tip the ship.
I love it when a guy, who likes me is jealous but overly jealous is scary if he threatens to beat people up if they stare or flirt with me. then jealousy becomes extreme possessiveness. I'm jealous a lot if he talks to other girls but I don't really show it because I'm too prideful
jealousy is always a problem. sure, it confirms that your SO is still interested in you but it also confirms that your SO is insecure about either something in the relationship, something about you, or something about him or herself. if you feel happy because your SO is jealous because of you, you're going to have some problems down the road.
he's wrong to be jealous. he should want whats best for her.
i agree
I think we can also feel jealous even when we dont have feelings for the person ie: when someone who was in love with us falls for someone else. We feel jealous here because it seems like the other person "took" them away from us.
But I agree that a little jealousy can definitely help a relationship.
a little jealousy is reasonable in the beginning of a relationship
but when both of you are in a long serious relationship,
there shouldn't be too much jealousy because it just means he's insecure and doesn't trust you.
i might sound so messed up but my SO right now is super jealous but i think it's so cute that he's so protective of me. it's def not always a bad thing.
@mewithoutu77@xanga - my boy really doesnt act jealous. its only when we start talking about past things that i realize how he was jealous at the time. i think its cute too.
its like a way of confirming that they wouldnt want to lose you.mm a little jealousy is okay because then you know that they're scared to lose you.
Even when jealousy is a problem, I don't think it's always the jealous person who's in the wrong. A person can be jealous in a relationship, and that jealousy can be perfectly reasonable. Sometimes people put blinders on and don't realize that their own actions are inappropriate. Their SO thinks they shouldn't be jealous, and dismisses the persons feelings and continues doing what they were doing, and then the whole relationship goes to shit.
I'm never really jealous, I'm protecting my man!
I once wrote a blog about a skank hanging all over him at a party...that sparked something in me. The mega-evil eye may have settled that. ;3 She doesn't hang around us any more...haha.
It's not jealousy per se, but it's a similar feeling. Like "I'M the only one allowed to touch him like that!"
But I agree with you. There's a small portion of jealousy that should be allotted in a serious relationship. Anything more and that is going overboard.
i think jealousy (like rage, resentment, possessiveness...) is a natural feeling, but i don't think it's healthy in a relationship. it's indicative of mistrust.
its not one bit healthy
I definitely agree.
@doorman - Jealousy does not translate to being incapable of wanting what's best for someone.
I'm loving that I've finally learnt something decent from Datingish.
@ciecolamore@xanga - It's human.
It makes sense. But as it looks, jealousy is relative.
I don't like jealousy at all, it just makes you look insecure and weak to me.
It's human nature to feel jealous once in a while. A small dose would do good in a relationship; but if it's too much, then that could be really annoying and frustrating.
Jealousy is POISON Envy.
Funny you should ask, my bf of a year and 4 months has jealousy issues. Nothing extreme, but whenever I go out with friends he gets jealous. I didn't think of it much in the beginning (aw how cute he cares), but now, it gets very annoying (aka I can't do anything without him getting upset). It's definitely mistrust no matter how much he wants to deny it, and it hurts. But sometimes when he puts up the jealousy flag, it's a realization on my part (what am I doing?). I have drinking issues, so it def helps when he's like that. Puts me in my place when I need it.
Lol. I was so distracted by the misspelling of 'jealousy.'
Anyway, my boyfriend gets jealous. Kinda cute sometimes.Kinda annoying somethings. It's human nature.