Last night I had a very interesting conversation with my friends. We all could relate to each other because we have all had a handful of people in our lives that we had an unexplainable physical attraction to. We all agreed it has to be the pheromones. Human pheromones are gender specific, naturally occurring substances that trigger specific “mating” responses. You meet someone and even if you know they aren't the best looking person on the earth, you can't stay away from them. Something constantly pulls you towards them.
I've found that this type of connection isn't always emotional. And when the physical attraction is there but you are incompatible emotionally, it is an absolute disaster. It creates an unhealthy chemical attachment to the person, and what if that person is completely WRONG for you? Two of 3 people I've ever had this feeling for were absolutely awful but it was the chemical, toxic, connection that kept me coming back to them. Both of them ended it with me, and thank God they did, because who knows how long the physical attraction I felt for them would have kept me coming back for more hurt and let downs. I know that many of my friends are stuck in one of these situations and it's very easy to think "Just leave them already!" but I know how they feel, and it is not easy to leave someone that you have a strong chemical connection to (stupid pheromones).
I think the best thing to do is to let the people in these situations figure out there own way to work through their feelings and find out what is right for them. I'm lucky enough to have found someone I have a physical AND emotional connection with and hope everyone is lucky enough to find this kind of connection in their lifetime.
Is there someone that you have an unbelievable physical attraction to?
Recommend
Comments (50)
The way this post is formatted makes me want to gouge my eyes out.
...ever heard of paragraphs?
LOL DREADED WALL OF TEXT!
I've felt for a couple months that my new boyfriend and I don't match at all in terms of humor and conversation, but I just love his body so damn much...
Uh, pheromones don't exactly control human sexual attraction or behavior the way they do in animals. We can detect the presence of pheromones through regular olfactory means, yea, but for the most part, we don't have a specific sensory organ that can process the chemical messages of pheromones the way animals can. The main sensory organ in animals that does this, the vomeronasal organ, is practically non-functional in humans. :\ So, you can't use pheromones as an excuse. Just saying.
@salvatruca_stalking_havok13@xanga - i approve of this answer. we just learned this in biopsychology.
@just_the_average_jane@xanga - Amen.
but I managed to read it, and @salvatruca_stalking_havok13@xanga is correct.
@Andrea_Vengeance@xanga -@softaswater@xanga - - Science: it just wants to be loved too. Poor science. :(
Contrary to popular belief, there still hasn't been any hard evidence
for human pheromones...This pheromones-and-sexual-attraction stuff is
all pseudoscience.
Reading this post gave me a headache. And yeah, I've experienced that once or twice. ;)
@just_the_average_jane@xanga - yes.
Does it really work? It does not seem to work for me, I don't know why. Or maybe it's the perfume.... that was the problem...
Well aside from all the english teacher comments, (it's ok, I am majoring in Literature too!) I have completely felt this for someone. I was so attracted to him, that I would completely look the other way whenever he did something unforgivable. Thank goodness he moved to a different state and is out of my life, because this could have been a very unfortunate relationship!!
There is absolutely no convincing evidence that humans excrete/use pheromones. Studies looking for them generally use concentrations of sweat hundreds of times higher then you'd ever see in the real world, and results are something along the lines of "FEMALES PREFER SWEAT OF NON-RELATED MALES TO BROTHERS!" But no one has yet to isolate these mystery chemicals--though we can, for example, in the case of pheromone-using insects. There is some suggestion that pheromones may be responsible for female menstrual cycles linking up when they live in close proximity, but again--inconclusive.
That said: Yes, sometimes there is instant, strong physical attraction. This could be based on a number of factors, most of which probably aren't conscious. Interesting, I guess, but what of it?
Although there is no evidence for pheromones there are cases where people are super attracted to someone and it's not just because they look good. I know that I've been turned off by the way someone smells, and I'm not talking about body odor. Some girls taste good, some naturally taste bad to me... and I'm not just talking about kissing. I'm not sure how to explain it, it's not something that is easily articulated. Both the human mind and body are super complex, but I know what you are talking about. I am very picky in who I date and I go for/keep dating girls who I have this strong attraction for but who are also good girlfriends to me.
Pheromones are only unconsciously detected. Perfumes who claim they have pheromones don't work because they use animal pheromones. Plus, pheromones are different for each person so it's not like you can add pheromones and attract the opposite sex. I think it may worse because it blocks your own natural scent so your true admirer can't detect it.
Here are some articles that speak to attractions, pheromones and the science behind it.
The science of love, attraction and losing it
How your voice attracts the opposite sex
Ovulation is when a girl is most attractive
ouch.
So that's what it is!
Pseudoscience or not, there is definitely something that makes my boyfriend's BO attractive to me. Odd but true.
(One time, we were playing Ultimate Frisbee with the kids at camp and he was super sweaty and gross, but I so wanted him right then and there. It's not the smell I'm attracted to--there's something in it. But, go ahead, science, and refute what I feel to be true.)
@Katja88@xanga - It's probably associations you have with the smell. Smell is extremely powerful in triggering memories (if anyone really wants a citation I'll find some) so even if you're not consciously triggering memories, it probably has all kinds of happy associations.
Yeah, but I have a mental and emotional connection with him too, so I'm not sure if it counts.
@astudyinemerald@xanga - Nope. Not at that point.
Cite all the research you want; I'm a psych major, I've already seen it. The nose knows.
My professor said that a research on sweaty tshirts were accurate when referring to pheromones.. Well, it wasn't just.. or probably even pheromones.
Women smelled the sweaty tshirts, and picked the one they thought smelled most attractive.. Studies showed that they chose the man who was most genetically different from them.. by choosing the certain tshirt.
And men chose the tshirt of women who were ovulating. Didn't matter how genetically similar/different they were. hahahaha
I never heard of the word pheromones but this is a fascinating post & I do believe it's true too cause I have felt that attraction thing before
.
lol, i love how much hate there is towards this.