Sunday, 17 January 2010
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The Old Boring Couple
The boyfriend and I have been together for quite some time now -- it will be 4 and 1/2 years this week. We moved into our own apartment back in June and we love living together. As a couple, we have been through a lot. When we met, I was 17 and he was 18... so we met very young in life. I'm not going to go into details about our past or the disagreements we've had.
So long story short, lately our relationship has been very, well, to be honest, it's been very bland. We have been talking the past few days about this and discovered that we are turning into that old couple who sits at home and does nothing. Don't get me wrong, I love doing nothing and sitting on the couch, cuddling, and watching a good movie. But that's all we do. Everyday we do the same thing -- he goes to work, I stay home, he comes home from work, we eat dinner, watch TV and then go to bed [you know, with few rewards in there ;) ]. Once classes start up again, I will go to class and he will go to work and then go to classes. We need some spice in our relationship. We discussed our problems and have agreed that this is what is tearing our relationship apart.
Both of us are willing to work at this, but honestly... neither of us have been in this situation with someone else, so we have no idea what to do to fix this problem. We love each other so much and don't want to break up. I know there are a lot of things you can do that cost money, and while those are great options and we take advantage of them, we need some creative things to do that cost little to no money at all.
That's where you guys come in. What are some ideas for couple to do that cost little to no money at all? What are some creative ideas for staying in? And have any of you been in this type of situation? What did you do to fix it?
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- From: sjnjld0716
- Name: Stephanie
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Comments (47)
- How about taking a walk outside?
- Experimenting with recipes, making up your own recipes from whatever you can find in the fridge
- Disney movie marathon (or other movie genres)
- Bowling (where I'm from, it costs about 5$ per game and 2$ on featured nights)
- Make smores!
- Ice skating
- round up a group and play Cranium or other board game
- head to a local market and look at all the arts and crafts
Sounds like me and my boyfriend. We've been together for three years, and we met when we were 14 (I turn 18 a week from Saturday, he's 17). We obviously don't live together, but we're the old boring couple anyway. He never wants to go out, so we're usually on the couch playing video games or watching movies. We only go to dinner if his family initiates it. It gets really boring. We never have date nights. I was talking to him about this last night. He told me he just doesn't want to go out, and it's a real bummer. We waited forever for the ability to go out (I still can't drive, and he just got his license in September), and now he just won't. We can't hang out unless his parents are home 'cause I can't be there without them and he refuses to go out. We also have little money to go blow on date nights, and so, I hate to say it, I just resign to sitting on the couch or not seeing him at all.
He's not interested in little "fun at home" ideas, either. He's always asking "What do you want to do?" but he shoots my ideas down while refusing to supply his own.
I swear that guy in the picture in the post looks just like your boyfriend.
Anyways, I favorited this link a while ago in case I needed ideas.
Quality time is important to me and makes me feel loved. My boyfriend and I have been exercising and cooking a lot together, and it's great. We are also developing a tabletop RPG together and play World of Warcraft with each other sometimes. We sit at home doing nothing a lot, too, but as long as there are activities we can do together once in a while, I'm fine. He's a workaholic -- when he comes home from his 8 to 5 job, he immediately goes to work on the game doc or on the novel he's currently writing. I've gotten used to this, give him the space and time he needs, and appreciate the one-on-one time we make sure we have time for in our schedules. If we go too long without having fun together, we both tend to get depressed.
Go outside
Go skiing / snowboarding
In the summer, go to the beach.
Exercise together.
Learn to cook / Cook together
Try new sex positions... :P
And me and my beau personally LOVE going to Ikea....
Play monopoly in real life or on pogo.com, rent a video game, go to wal mart, clean together, make dinner...
Bowling doesn't cost very much. I live near a college town and they have all you can bowl for $5 on Wednesday nights. Even on other nights it doesnt cost much for a couple games and a few snacks for both of us (we dont get shoes though, lol)
Cook dinner together! Look up some crazy recipes on the internet and make a feast. You'll improve your "working together" skills and it should also be pretty fun. Afterwords have a romantic dinner to celebrate.
Go on walks. I dont know where you live, around here we have over a foot of snow on the ground and we're lucky to have the temp highs above 30. Just suck it up and go outside though, if you have on the proper clothing its really not that bad. And once my boyfriend gets me outside I usually dont even think about the cold cuz I'm having a good time.
Work out together. Go for a run, go for a bike ride, lift some weights, do sit ups and push ups. It might not be that fun, but having your SO there coaching you on is a little helpful.
Game night. Dont just do things solo. Get a group of friends and play some board games or something like that. Even just board games between the two of you can be entertaining.
Find a new hobby to take up together. Whether its art or some kind of sport...or whatever interests you. Teach each other new things.
Play video games. Unless you dont have a console... but you can always try saving up and investing in one! Personally I think the Wii is awesome! Between the old school games and the new work out stuff it has, my boyfriend and I can always find entertainment in it (of course we're both competitive people too...)
I think this happens to a lot of couples that have been together for quite some time. You've probably never experienced this with anyone else because you haven't been with them long enough for things to turn into a routine. Just try to do something different once a week. Whether it is an old-fashioned date night (dinner and a movie, even if dinner is at home) or something new (which is up to you considering I don't know what you've all done).
My suggestion: Get rid of the TV or play games on it rather than watching it so much. Your brain is more active when you're asleep than when you watch TV so it's not exactly a stimulating thing to do together. My husband and I have found that board games are anything but boring and we enjoy doing that. Going on walks when the weather is halfway decent is another option. Also, when we get bored there is always sexytime.
- make a dessert together, and then eat it together
- play board games
- build something.. a puzzle, a photo frame, upholster a chair, etc.. something you can put in the house and look at that will remind you of time spent together.
Go danger wanking together...it's all the rage. I posted about it:
http://plentymorefishoutofwater.blogspot.com/2009/10/sunday-confessional-sex-stevie-and.html
@InTheThin@xanga - haha I was totally gonna comment on that.
So I'd suggest going out of town together. My boyfriend and I live in a really boring town, but when we take that hour drive to the city, there's so much we want to do. And cities don't always have to be expensive. Sometimes just talking a walk in a new area could spark some ideas.
Play games together (all types: card games, what-if, board games, bed games {one being find the honey}), cook together, take walks, indoor picnics, outdoor picnics, star-gazing, talking about important opinions (have you talked about children yes or no and what-ifs?, when and what type of house you'd like, when and how you'd be married if you intend to get married, etc.), try something new (foods?) twice a week. There are plenty of things. You have to be creative. That is the key to staying (happily) together. Creativity, love and understanding.
- Cooking together/Cooking competition
- Having a game night
- Role-playing haha
- Browse through a community newsletter to find dance classes, cooking classes, book clubs, movie clubs, etc
- Mini-vacation (like do a tourist thing in your own town, or if you're from different towns, take one another through your home town)
- Get in the car and just drive together, talking, listening to music, and generally getting lost
Oh yes, I agree with one of the posters above. Excercise together. It's not only healthy but due to chemical and mental aspects, you do feel closer.
Get a pet! :)
I like doing nothing with my husband. It's awesome.
romance each other. Just because you live in the same house doen't mean you shouldn't date, take each other for granted and stagnate.
I had this problem with my ex (its not the reason we broke up though)... Go for hikes, walks, runs, its like sex but funner. Get your heart rate up together. Find each others weaknesses and strengths and challenge them. Volunteer together. Take quizes and surverys and talk about them. We were together 7 years and we were never board with each other, he just decided that drugs and his guy friends were funner.
I think going for walks together is cute, or walking in the mall together if the weather is not nice. Also maybe have a photo shoot with each other. It could be innocent or sexy.
You could go hiking, camping, working out at a gym, biking around the neighborhood!
get outside
search for local free events
-=-music
-=-art
go to local festivals
go to a fancy restaurant thats different/obscure(Ethiopian, Indian,Greek,fondue etc.)
explore your city(if its safe)
amusement park
picnic on a sunday afternoon
adopt a pet/browse animal shelters or pet stores
plan a study night
got o the local arts & crafts store and learn a new quick & easy) craft
You could always (if you know anyone and are up to it and like kids) offer to babysit someone's kids! Babysitting together would show the other exactly how you react to certain situations and if you are good with kids.
Buy some madlibs! Fill them in together. I love madlibs :)
Find something you both can learn together, like a different language or how to play poker, etc.
Bake something together? Let him decorate, or you decorate, or do it together.
Drive somewhere :) anywhere. down the street, up the street, on the sidewalk (please don't)... and blare some good music :)
Start saving up money to do something.
Until then, I suggest taking a hike together, or maybe you guys can invest in some board games. (Or play games online!)