This is the third post on the topic of Dating. The first one had 5 tips on Dating in 2010, the second one had tips on Where to find dates. Both where featured on Datingish.
The second post was inspired by comments on the first post, and the post for today follows the same pattern. The question for the second post was "where did you meet your last date?" and a surprising number of people answered "at work". Other people wondered whether dating at work was such a good idea.
So today it's about love on the job. Could it work? Or is it a disaster waiting to happen? Well yes and no.
First of all, we spend a lot of time at work. We spend this time in close contact with our coworkers, clients, suppliers and others. It's not really surprising that one fine day, you meet somebody you really like, somebody you would like to go out with. After all, you already share quite a few things with each other. You have the same work environment. The same colleagues. If your jobs are similar, you may well have the same educational background. Perhaps you have the same working hours, so you can easily meet up after work.
And when you meet up, there's lots of fun to be had. You can bitch about that idiot in the accounts department. Share a laugh about the ridiculous dress sense of that guy in marketing. Speculate about how long the new receptionist will last in the job. If your jobs are difficult, you can release some tension by talking about it: after all, your partner probably knows
exactly how you feel.
The downside is obvious too. People may gossip about you. But the biggest risk of all is that your relationship ends acrimoniously. That's bad enough, but now you have to face each other every day, which is just about the last thing you want. If you dated your boss, kiss that promotion goodbye. No more raises for you!
So here's the question: Have you ever dated anybody at work? How did that go?
First of all, we spend a lot of time at work. We spend this time in close contact with our coworkers, clients, suppliers and others. It's not really surprising that one fine day, you meet somebody you really like, somebody you would like to go out with. After all, you already share quite a few things with each other. You have the same work environment. The same colleagues. If your jobs are similar, you may well have the same educational background. Perhaps you have the same working hours, so you can easily meet up after work.
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Comments (15)
When I was in Co-op at a Public Utilities Company in the big city, I flirted back and forth with the guy whose family manages the cafeteria. We met up once on a casual basis with our friends but that was it despite my desire of it going further. That was the closest I came to work relationship since most of my work placements were more family-oriented and the staff typically were women with families.
Ba hah, my first job was working at the city, I worked with a bunch of guys my age and then the age jumped to late 30's. The boys my age were more interested in beer than girls so no.
this makes me think of jim and pam in the office haha.
but yes, I did at one point have a work relationship... and it did not end well lol. well, the thing was, he didn't really want to pursue me any further and we kind of stopped hanging out outside of work at that point and it was a little awkward going into work knowing he didn't have those same feelings for me like I did for him. I guess it's good I don't work there anymore haha!
After one of my exes and I broke up, he got me a job working where he worked. Being in close contact with each other 3-4 days out of the week led to us...well not exactly dating again, but sleeping with each other again. Eventually I quit and stopped talking to him because it was too complicated and stressful to deal with.
nope but i think work is a great place to meet someone
Oh wait... I knew an acqaintance by family connections who offered me a temporary reception position while their usual receptionist was on summer vacation. I took the job offer as a favour to him and we dated briefly while we spent more time working together. Since it was a temporary position in the big city I had to relocate for, I didn't have to deal with the repercussions once the employment term (and relationship) ended.
I've dated someone I worked with and I don't think I will ever do it again. We both got along great at work since we had just about the same schedule and had really gotten to know each other. I thought he would be a great person to date and so we went out a few times (although I had a feeling it wouldn't work out) and things just didn't seem to work out. I lost interest quickly once we started hanging out outside of work and unfortunately, we still had to work together. So, I wouldn't recommend it but sometimes, it's hard to not want to date someone you work with. I'd just make sure it's someone in a completely different department!
First of all, it's best to check what your company's rules are regarding office dating. You don't want to end up without a job when exploring office romance.
Dating in the work place is very complicated. It's just littered with bad omen. You can't exactly not see each other when the relationship doesn't work out. When things go south, you're forced to see each other while nursing a broken heart.
Then there's the office gossip. No office romance can survive unnoticed. Everybody will have their opinion about you and your relationship but it all boils down to one thing really: is it worth it?
I dated a colleague from another department. We didn't directly work together but because of certain events he was transferred in my department and I ended up working for him. The gossip was ridiculous and at times it was really hard maintaining a professional relationship. Mainly because we couldn't stop looking at each other with googly eyes. In one meeting, in front of other colleagues, he slipped and called me "honey" instead of by my name (embarrassing but also very sweet). Most people at work already knew about us but those who didn't certainly got a clue by then.
Other than that one slip, we were very professional while at work. That meant no hand holding, no kissing, no lovey-dovey stuff (well, when people are around at least). As soon as we left the building though we couldn't care less who saw us doing what.
I think it's really important to maintain professionalism when dating in the office. This shows superiors and subordinates that you maybe in a relationship with this person but that doesn't mean you're letting it affect your job.
Dating at work definitely has its pros and cons. But to answer my initial question, is it worth it? For me, the answer is a big resounding YES! My office honey and I got married and will be celebrating our 7 year anniversary this year.
Well lets see...I dated a girl 3 years ago that I still currently work with. Things ended on 'ok' terms I guess. I would say she and I have our good days and our bad days in our work relationship...which can make us look like we're best friends one day and bitter enemies the next. But the point is that we're trying I guess, which is important, to stay friends and all...I mean, this is jsut a college school job. Imagine the 'real world'?
i started a relationship with someone at work and we hid the relationship for about 6 months until people started asking questions and putting the pieces together. it was good at first because we worked together, saw each other once in a while and it was a little riskee to be having a relationship with someone i worked with but when people found out and told my managers, we were asked to either stop it or they would ask one of us to leave so we decided to stop the relationship to save our jobs. it wasn't like it was affecting our work, but i guess people didn't like it. i think it could've worked out if we stayed together but there was just too much fire going on.
never have, but if the situation arises, it might just be for fantasy purposes. it would be too much drama, so chances are, it won't happen.
My most recent ex I met from my current job, and we hadn't seen or talked to eachother in about a month after a pretty awkward break-up where over a month after we officially were not together anymore, he told me we "can't even be friends anymore; goodbye." through a text. Apparently he forgot I still worked with him. First couple shifts we had together after the I-can't-handle-a-friendship-with-anyone freak out were very awkward, but if you can handle being cordial to someone who may be your worst enemy one day, then go for it.
The person I am dating/living with now I met at work.
We both quit the job at the same time, honestly, it didn't negatively affect our work, or positively affect it,it's not like we fought a lot.
(Okay, that wasn't ENTIRELY true, we did have this huge fight this one night at work when we were both closing. He stabbed me with a knife (That sounds great, doesn't it, but it was only my finger that got cut xD) and we fought over the hose and the floor ended up as a minature lake, but OTHER than that..)
Now we live together and we're doing semi-okay.
i've been dating my gf for a year and a half now and we both work together. at first people were all wth...are they serious that kinda tihng and didnt believe it unless they saw us on a break or something. now people dont mind or say anything. infact they come to me if they see someone weird talking to her or anything haha.
I'm dating a coworker. Gary and I have been together for three years and the relationship is going great Sometimes it is okay to date your coworker.