Thursday, 07 January 2010
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Find Me a Date!
The other day I wrote a post with 5 hot tips about Dating. It got featured on Datingish (where else?) and got 2,300 views. Some of the commenters added their own tips, and some asked: this is all very well, but you didn't say where we can find dates! At first I didn't think much of that. Was I expected to provide a Yellow Pages of Dating Locations?
New Yorkers: Archie's Diner on the corner of 4th and Sackett
Parisians: Cafe Nouveau on Rivoli
Madrileños: Café de Oriente on Plaza OrienteMini-quiz: which of these places actually exists? Anyway, you get the drift. I cannot write a Lonely Planet Dating Guide.
Still, I do have an idea where you are likely to meet potential dates. In short: any place where you have chance to get to know each other a little bit. I go out quite a bit, and it boggles me why many of the cafes, bars and clubs need to put to volume up so high that any conversation is out of the question. How are you supposed to chat up an interesting person in such an environment?
He: "Hi! I like your hair!"
She: "What?"
He: "I LIKE YOUR HAIR!"
She: "No, I don't smoke!"This guy is not going anywhere. Restaurants then? Well can you see yourself crossing a restaurant to a nice looking guy and ask if you can have a piece of his banoffee pie? Surely, there are lots of cafes where you an sit down and talk. But not many people go there alone. Are you going to butt in when a group is talking about Avatar and say to one of them "Actually, I'm going to see it tomorrow, want to come along?"
I would say the best places are those you wouldn't think of immediately. Work environments come to mind. Schools, colleges and university too. Short courses can be great, too. Learn a language! What these places have in common is that you can just be yourself and let 'fate' do the rest. You won't need killer pick-up lines. (On the point of that, have a look at websites about pick-up lines. They'll make you cringe. Typical example: "If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together".)
Sometimes you need a bit of luck. My co-blogger Miriam and I met at a concert. Not a good place. Too loud, and people just want to see the band, not you. But hey, the singer was late...
The song for today is Iris by Goo Goo Dolls. It was suggested by quite a few commenters on Miriam's article about love songs. Who am I to argue? It's one hell of a song, that's what it is.
When everything seems like the movies
Yeah you bleed just to know your aliveSo, where did you meet your last date?
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- From: hundredsongsinhundreddays@xanga
- About Me: Jan-Wouter Stigter and Miriam Cassar write their stories connected with the songs they post for the next hundred days.
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Comments (26)
Starbucks. The central hub for random strangers to meet plus it's everywhere. Find one at the nearest corner, get a latte and start shopping...
match.com
My last date became my husband. :) I met him in college - I was friends with his roommate.
I met my SO through work. Which isn't always the greatest idea for everyone.
I find the best place to meet guys is through friends or at social gatherings like concerts or festivals, even in a simple place like a grocery store.
As long as your willing to start a conversation and be brave!
:]
I met him at a small religious chamber music festival.
Fellow musician and Christian in one go? Score.
What's a good place to meet for a person who is terrified of the public?
schooll haha
I've found that the best places to meet people are wherever you happen to be at the time; you just have to open up your eyes and take notice of others around you. I'm constantly meeting people at places like the grocery store, the park, photography courses, etc. I just recently met a guy at a research facility, where they specialize in surveying consumers for various products.
Lucky for me, I'll be seeing him for two hours over the next six days :)
@nakedgammer@xanga - Good one. I left out finding dates through the internet.
"But not many people go there alone. Are you going to butt in when a group is talking about Avatar..."
yes, this is why girls should go out alone more frequently. and yes, i'm aware that this is not going to happen.
about starting relationships at work: ever hear the expression "don't dip your pen in company ink"? that's one i don't plan to break anytime soon. (of course, there are exceptions to the rule, but it's too risky for my own taste.)
Friend of a friend.
He was one of my co-workers. Never went anywhere though, which is probably a good thing!
Co-worker at GameStop. I don't recommend work relationships, but he's it for me.
At the pharmacy, he approached me.
I met my man 5 years ago either at youth group or in the school cafeteria. I forget which came first. High school is all very foggy.
@Utoppia - Not had such luck yet even though Starbucks is one of the places I frequent - alone may I add
At an anime convention.
I'm horrible when it comes to chatting in a club. Sign language for me. Sometimes it's a blessing in disguise -- gives me a reason to lean in close.
I found my man at school :)
On a crammed city railway.
Work
Love the blog , I recommend book stores / coffee bars as a place to meet others too , here they have both combined & you don't have to shout to hear anyone lol
No guy ever comes up to talk to me and I'm too chicken to start a conversation. =(
where did I meet my last date? heck it's been so long I don't even remember when my last date was
@Parsimony@xanga - Now that is unusual!
i met R at a party on new years eve. we've been getting to know each other the past couple of days. but yeah, there are plenty of places to meet other people; school, work, volunteer, gym, special events, travel & on the plane, etc. basically anywhere one could strike a conversation. the other day, i strike up a conversation with this girl who worked at nutrition store. all you really have to do is ask how their day is going. and let the conversation go with the flow rather than trying too hard and making things awkward.