Saturday, 26 December 2009
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"I Adore Her and It Gets on Her Nerves!"
As we sit here and watch a movie, which is her favorite past time, I can't help but to rub my fingers through her hair. My hands are drawn to her like a magnet. Her skin is like silk. My every move is made in an effort to bring pleasure to her body. I sit up and position my body behind hers as she sits indian style. I spread my legs open so that they straddle her so I can be in a position to rub her back as if to give her a massage. I rub her shoulders and back. I squeeze her arms and shoulders. I hold her with both my arms hoping to feel the love radiate between our bodies. Back and forth I go between rubbing her and holding her. I love her so much.
Then the movie comes to an end. I bring my body around to kiss her on the arch of her nose, right between her eyes. She moves away. She wants to watch the credits. The movie was good, but not that good. What's more important, my love or the names of the people who acted in the movie? Sandra Bullock,"Blind Side" in case you want to know.
I lay on my side and look at her silhouette. I love the shadow figure that sits next to me. As I look at her tears of love run down my cheek.
Then we wrap the rest of the gifts for the kids.
I ask her if she wants to know what I want for Christmas? I tell that all I want is for her to be able to look at me and feel what I feel! She says,"I Do!"
I ask her if she enjoyed the way I rubbed her and held her as she watched the movie? She says she enjoyed some of it but it kinda got on her nerves.
My tears of love quickly turn to sorrow. Then I hurt. When I hold her I feel my own heart beat out of my chest. My love hurts me and annoys her. Then I lay on my side and cry myself to sleep.
In the morning we will wake up together as if all is well. The kids will open they're gifts. And we will go on with life, waiting on the next time I make a fool of myself!
Have your signs of affection ever annoyed your SO?
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- From: mikepaperchaserb@xanga
- Name: mikepaperchaserb
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Comments (55)
women should all be so lucky
She just wants to focus on the movie, I mean there are times when people want some space, y'know?
And yes, I've experienced a couple times in which I've shown affection but it was badly received and/or not reciprocated in the least bit. It sucks, more so because I can't read for sht.
Yep.
Sometimes people just need space. Doesn't mean they don't love you back just as much; it's just that some people are more physical than others.
Oh, if only your dear wife could know how this is affecting you! My wife and I have been married for nearly 45 years. I often tell her, "I love you, Honey!" and then wait in vain for her to reciprocate. And yet I know that we each love the other very dearly! My wife just can't respond very well - although she did respond very actively in physical sex when we were a few years younger and able to indulge!
Gary Smalley's son, a qualified sex counselor, has said that the most sexually stimulating activity a man can engage in, is to do the dishes at home! That's right: want to be super sexy and magnetically appealing to your wife: volunteer to do the dishes (and I suppose, by extension), other forms of housework!
I wouldn't quit what your doing, but would suggest that you don't make her feel 'pressured' to respond! Just let her know in a myriad little ways, that she is super important to you and you love her very dearly!
With love and understanding
David
Sometimes people just want some space, it's nothing personal really. You could have a talk with her about it, though, I guess, if it bothers you that badly.
@Grampa_David@xanga - thanks for the advice man.
@FallenReign@xanga - i have talked to her and things are alot better than before. so i have to give her credit where it id due
@hilaw@xanga - that's what i say. good to know there are women who like the type of love i display
D: She's really lucky.
I agree with Grampa_David, don't stop what you're doing. I'm sure she doesn't mean it in a way that it hurts her. Sometimes it's something that you really want to focus on that makes love not the first thing on your mind. In this case, I guess it's the movie. I'm sure you have something that holds your attention sometimes--be it important or simple as a movie.
@hilaw@xanga - amen.
I would have given anything for my ex to treat me like that. I was the one feeling what you felt... and she was like your wife. My ex broke my heart into a million pieces four months ago. If I could turn back time and just give her space, it would have worked out... I am to needy :(
@just_the_average_jane@xanga -
word. sometimes, people just need space...this made me cry. If I knew that I ever made my boyfriend feel like this, who i love more than anything, it would tear me up inside.
My signs of affection can anony my wife if they are given as a justification for MY love for her ignoring what she really needs. That is, I idolize these "signs of affection" forgetting that in this world under the care of a loving God there is time for everything including NOT giving those signs (and it is OK not to give them, read Ecclesiasties 3:1-8). It is in Jesus Christ that we can have a heatlhy and loving relationship and these signs of affection may or may not be necessary.
Aw, I hope I find someone like you! I have yet to be lucky enough to find that, but I have had it happen to me. It does suck.
Love and adoration are great, but we all need our space sometimes. And because you want to be 'one' with her during the movie, doesn't necessarily mean she wants that as well. Which isn't to say that she doesn't want it at all, just not at that moment. She loves you. If she says she does, she does. Because that's what love means... you trust in each other. :)
You're a kind man... but sometimes we just want to be able to pay attention. Although I don't see how that would be distracting. It wouldn't be for me anyways.
my boyfriend is just as affectionate as you seem to be. i enjoy it most of the time, but i agree with some of the posters here. sometimes i just need my space. i love that he likes to show me how much he loves me but i don't need him touching me all the time. sometimes just sitting next to each other hand in hand is just as nice as a nice back massage.
It can be SMOTHERING for a guy to be TOO into you like it seems you are. We need to feel loved, yes but need SPACE and to be able to BREATHE. Make us WANT that affection from you, not run from it!
I can definitely relate to this post. Hate to say this, but I can be rather clingy.. my ex boyfriend put up with it, but my current guy sometimes can't handle that. So I've 'taught' myself to stop clamoring all over him, before I become too overbearing. Too much of a good thing is bad.
my boyfriend was always so focused on me that it just got on my nerves.. like i couldn't grin my nose because he''ll be asking me if everything was ok or if he could do anything to make me feel better..! it was so hard to deal with.. i wanted him to be an independent being just as me.. not for him to gave me all his attention to the point his life was second important.
Space.
affection is good when done at the appropriate time. if for example, I was trying to feel him up while he was watching a sports final game or favorite tv show, it would be disruptive and annoying, if I suddenly kissed him between the eyes. whenever I watch a movie and I miss even a single dialogue between the characters, I rewind and watch it again because I don't want to miss out possible key dialogue that would make me misunderstand the plot or something. it doesn't mean that I don't love him, but when I'm doing something that requires me to focus and be attentive, such as watching a movie, I prefer it to be like when I go out to a movie theatre and respect my space so I can enjoy the movie
cuddling is alright but a sensual massage is too much during movie time. I think she would've liked it if you actually watched the movie with her. paying attention to her is great but maybe she was looking forward to seeing the movie. being affectionate while the both of you aren't distracted by other things in bed is the best time for that.
thanks for all the advice people. i have learned alot from ya'll's posts!