We always hear stories of couples quarreling/fighting, and then there's this cold period which lasts from a few minutes to even hours, days and weeks where both parties decide to play ignore with each other until someone finally relents and gives in =
Apologizing first.So how do we justify who steps in and apologizes first?
I have a friend who has this deal with her boyfriend, whereby every week, both will take turns to give in to each other. So take this week for example, no matter what happens, my friend will have to give in first, and the following week, her boyfriend has to be the accommodating one.
But what happens if the subject-matter blows out of proportion and is not as simple as what it seemed like, and no one gives the impression of wanting to take the first step in making up?
What if both are too egoistic and do not want to put their pride down to call or text the other party first?
What if one party has actually taken the initiative already, but the response from the other party is not ideal enough for a reconciliation?
What I strongly feel is that if a couple still treasures their relationship and wants to make things right together, what is so difficult with sending a short text like,
"I miss you" or even
"I still love you no matter what happened"?
At the end of the day, wouldn't overcoming all these setbacks together make the love between a couple even stronger and more special?
What do you think?
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Comments (15)
I'm lucky coz my boyfriend is always mature about things. When he's wrong, he apologizes. When I'm wrong, he explains to me sweetly why he thinks I'm wrong. And he is open to hear out my side too.
Really, someone just needs to apologize. One or the other might have done something wrong, got snappy when the other person didn't even do anything to warrant it. If either one of them apologizes he/she should say they're sorry and why they are sorry. Just saying your sorry is like admitting you're wrong. You don't have to "give in" and admit to being "wrong" to feel liek saying, "I hate argueing with you. I love you, and I'm sorry I didn't handle things better. I know you're under a lot of stress and instead of getting all mad about you snapping at me, I should have just let it slide." I never use to think this way. Then again, I was wronged a lot in the past and I wanted to make a point. But with my girlfriend now, I don't let my pride get the best of me. Usually when one person apologizes, the other will too. :) Then you get to kiss and make up. Lol.
Being too proud to say you are sorry first is really lame. If I'm at fault I have no problem apologizing. Why continue an argument for no reason if it could just be over with? Luckily, I hardly ever get into arguments with my husband. We've really never gotten into a huge fight before anyway, we've gotten into a handful of small arguments, but that's about it. We are pretty good about resolving things. I just don't see the point in fighting...
usually we just talk about things before they blow up into a fight. i guess little arguments; but usually we are both pretty good about backing down if we are in the wrong.
I don't like to argue, but Im always first to usually give in - no matter what the situation.
...
I'm always the person who apologizes first.It sucks. Gr.I would end up likely resenting your friend's way of doing things if it were me. :p
However, either way, in all of the scenarios you put forth, if neither party is willing to apologize or try to talk it through rationally after the blow-up argument once they've cooled down a bit, then they probably aren't ready for a relationship so serious, OR they are not very compatible with each other. :/
@LauraG0929@xanga - Same here. If I think I was in the wrong, then I'm definitely apologizing, even if I'm the first one to do so.
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wow. i mean... yeah its ok to "take turns" but honestly... you shouldnt have such a hard heart if you relaly love one another.... be ready to give in if its.. not a huge fight.. like cheating or whatever
maybe im not saying this right...
the little stuff do matter. but.. whenever you are in a fight, just think about how much you love them and if its worth the "staying angry" status and then you decide how long you want to stay angry ... and even more, dont ALWAYS be the one to give in, esp when you are absolutely correct. cause thats just ... not disciplining them enough and letting them get away with things etc.
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