Monday, 07 December 2009

  • Highschool Sweethearts?


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    I'm wondering what people's opinions are of "high school sweethearts." I've heard about couples that are grandparents, but have been together since they were in high school. I also hear commonly about how once college comes around, it goes downhill.

    Is it our generation that just can't stay committed? I'm currently with my fiancee. We aren't getting married anytime soon, and we are in the end of our high school years.

    I'm just wondering what other people feel about high school relationships. Did you have one? Did you think it was going to last forever, but didn't? Do you think college can effect the relationship negatively, or were you in one that college strengthened?

Comments (117)

  • ordinary_gir1@xanga

    when it comes to this stuff it just depends on the people in the relationship.
    If they feel like they want to start over once college comes around it's their choice right? it's not like college puts some "i will break up your highschool relationship" spell on you

  • N3wSt0ry@xanga

    I don't know... high school guys are too immature =/ Well, the guys at my school are. I think for high school boys, a relationship is all just fun and games. 

  • msnatalie27@xanga

    My parents are "HS sweethearts" though they were friends since middle school. Similarly, my BF & I got together in senior year and now we're in our second year of college: we're living together, just got a cat together, and he moved out here to go to college with me.... the story is the same for both my parents and us.... it def. can happen, if "its meant to be", that is if you honestly love each other enough and are willing to sacrifice then anything is possible. But its not something that will magically happen; for both my parents and so far for us there are those super low times.... but you can recover from that... college makes you really mature and trust the other person and if that doesn't happen, most likely the relationship will be strained. 

  • parkedxenergy@xanga

    i've dated a few guys when i was in high school, but never did i think i was going to marry them. i just thought i was too young to be thinking about it.

    i really don't have a problem with high school sweethearts. i guess what bothers me, is when a couple that has only been dating a month or two, start saying they are in love. obviously, i dont know everything about their relationship or how much they do like each other, but, i know that love is when you've been together with that person for years and learn to love everything about them and are not just lovers, but will eventually become best friends. i just don't feel that kids that get married right past high school know the difference between lust and love.
    obviously, this is my opinion and i know that not ALL couples are like this, but this is just what i've noticed.
  • snapeful@xanga

    high school and fiancee? hmm. seems a little weird. cuz you're young, mostly. most people change once they hit college because.... you're separated. you expereicen new things. etc. i guess i think it's weird because at my parents' age and my age, you study. high school/college entrance exams take up a lot of time... it's weird to have any romance. american public schools probably allow more time for that though

  • cornyonacob@xanga

    still in high school T_T

  • CrAdLe2daGrAve@xanga

    MY HIGH SCHOOL WAS A BUNCHA STUPIDASS PEOPLE! THE END!

  • darkangel6541@xanga

    Heard of the "turkey drop," when couples break up over Thanksgiving break? It happens a lot, especially if they don't go to school near each other.

    However, I know a lot of people who purposely go to the same college as their SO, or a college near their SO, and they end up breaking it off because they grow apart. There are probably a lot of people it works out for; I just don't happen to know any of them.

    People change in college. People change in high school. People change pretty much everywhere. So, if two people can go through all that and STILL be attracted to each other, more power to them.

  • anonymous

    my best friend has been with her high school sweetheart for over 4 years (they got together in her sophomore year of HS, now she's in her junior year of college.. he was a couple years older which may have helped), and they are still going strong and it really seems like marriage is in the works. What I think has actually helped them is that they have in total been long distance for over half of their relationship and have learned to work through their problems very well. Neither has sacrificed their whole lives for the other... they didn't go to the same college, although they did go to colleges near each other for a year. They've been through so much between the distance, a lack of light at the end of the tunnel for being together in the near future, at least one "break", her getting with other guys on their "break", but they made it through all of it.
    I hope your relationship goes well, and since you are probably starting to choose colleges, I would just say that please don't choose a college just because your SO wants to go there. My uncle did that, and she left him for a doctor because he wanted to wait until he was more financially stable to marry her, and he's been pretty messed up since (about 20 years!).

  • XoAsianBabioX@xanga

    i have such a skewed view on high school sweethearts.  when older, successful couples tell me they were high school sweethearts, i feel so much admiration and find it so adorable.  but for younger couples, i find it to be naive and irking on poor judgment and bad chances. 

  • silverlocket_88@xanga

    .@ordinary_gir1@xanga - Agreed

    I wasn't serious in high school tho I dated a few guys and I met my first serious bf in college. His parents were high school sweethearts. You're lucky you met him early, I always adore high school sweethearts but I would say that you'll have more choices in college.

  • a_single_raindrop@xanga

    It really depends. If you (and your partner) want to make it work, and are seriously committed to making it work, then it usually will. I know many couples who chose to break it off the summer before college because they wanted to start college with no strings attached.


    I've been with my boyfriend since the end of sophore year, and I'm currently in my sophomore year of college. It's a lot more difficult when I don't see him as often as I'd like to, but it forced us both to work harder and appreciate each other more.

  • MissPixieGlitter@xanga

    it's not that high school relationships can't work out. but college is a really great time of personal growth and exploration, and sometimes people grow apart.

  • alltheseasonsx@xanga

    all i can say is...


    if it's meant to be

  • shillykins

    There was one "serious" boyfriend I had in high school (I blogged about him in my first blog) and we seriously KNEW we were going to get married. I can't even explain it but one night he told me he wanted to marry me and spend forever together. And I really thought it would happen. When I look back now, I think what we thought would happen was actually kind of immature and funny. But I would be so defensive back then when people told me nothing lasts forever or that it won't happen. Because I knew it would Hahahaha. I told people I was "engaged" too HAHa. Oh, the memories.

  • lose20fast@xanga

    I wish mine would have worked. We dated for 3 1/2 years, but became another statistic when it came time for college

  • nrb2233@xanga

    Depends on the people... I consider it luck to some extent.  Even if you want to make it work, sometimes people change after high school and in college, and it just doesn't work anymore.  I think nowadays it's harder because more people have so many more choices after high school that can change them.  And to some extent, people are less willing to commit now... We have so many options, sometimes it's overwhelming.  Currently, I'm 24, and am VERY different from how I was when I graduated high school.  I'm sure if either of the two bf's I had had in high school had extended much beyond a year or two after I left, it would have ended just because I changed quite a bit. 

  • CHRiSTiNE_x@xanga

    I was with my boyfriend since November of our senior year in high school.
    We broke up the September of our freshman year of college for a month.
    Lots of shit happened but then we got back together after a month because we realized that we still loved each other.
    It's December now and we're still together.
    We'll see how it goes. I'm realistic. I can see myself with or without him in my future.

  • DistantStarlight@xanga

    I think it can work. Although the majority of high school relationships don't seem to work out, I do know one couple out of my entire class who got married this spring after dating throughout high school and college. My husband and I did know each other vaguely in high school and then went to the same college and got closer then. If we hadn't gone to high school together we probably wouldn't have ended up married, but we weren't sweethearts IN high school. (He was really smart and while slightly younger than me was two grades ahead.) We know a few other couples like that who went to high school together but didn't discover love until later.

  • solidsnake8462@xanga

    @MissPixieGlitter@xanga - agreed.

    I just split up with my sweetheart actually. We've gone through one cycle of break-up make-up before. This is final. The distance is something that kills many relationships, especially in college because there are a lot of opportunities to change. It's nearly impossible to have the same hobbies, mannerisms, and interests in a place that facilitates exposure to new content.

  • Emmijoy@xanga

    i dated my high school sweetheart for four and a half years. definitely thought we were gonna get married. but you need to keep in mind, a lot of things change when you hit college. it also depends on if you two are planning on going to the same college, if you are even both planning on going. my problem was that my boyfriend didn't have the same goals as i did. i loved him, but he didn't want to grow up. you can only stay in "high school mode" for so long.

    but if you both have goals and know what you want, then it should be okay, even if you don't end up going to college in the same place. good luck! :)

  • Star_x_Love@xanga

    I don't know that many people who were still together since high school, but I know some who got married young and then divorced.

  • MiZzCHERRILICIOUSchink@xanga

    I'm in a relationship right now n I have been with my bf since the end of my sophomore year in high school... I'm a freshman in college now. in the beginning we were all "it'll last forever" n loveylovey.

    I'm not really too sure about now. I mean occasionally it is mentioned... I guess for me.. I would like it to last, but who knows.

    But I do see couples in high school that are like that. not many though.

    I think college could affect the relationship... depending on the person. college kids I guess tend to party n things happen? but I think that is mostly if they dorm or something.

  • mattrice92@xanga

    I've been with my girlfriend since I was a freshman, and she a sophomore. I'm now in the middle of senior year, and she's in college. Things came very, very close to falling apart because of her transition, though. She initially didn't think she wanted to commit, but once she settled in, it was all fine without having to "take a break" or have an "open relationship." At this point, things are the best I could ask for with the small distance. Hopefully, I'll be joining her next fall, and we can continue our relationship the way it was before she had to leave.

  • MiZzCHERRILICIOUSchink@xanga

    btw I think its cute when its an older couple that are high school sweethearts. :)

    I knew a girl in my class that I overheard her talking n she thought it was creepy. =.= people these days. lolz

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