Sunday, 06 December 2009

  • Playing with Fire with Bad Boys

    According to Alexandra Burke, Bad Boys are always catching her eye. She's prone to danger, and has been all her life. She knows she's playing with fire, and she doesn't know why. She knows they're no good for her, It's the risk she's willing to take for the Chemistry.

    Oh dear Alexandra. However, I had a conversation with a guy yesterday, and he mentioned that girls go for the bad boys.

    My purpose is to prove this otherwise! I, as an individual, have never gone for a "Bad Boy." They're very stereotypical, but I guess the idea of what they mean. They being, Alexandra Burke and the boy I spoke to last night.

    And, I kind of understand where Alexandra Burke is coming from. However I bet I can sort her thoughts out, and all of your thoughts out. It's not bad boys that girls want, it's excitement.

    Yeah, we want loyalty and protection, but we also want excitement. And sometimes, only the bad boys we know can offer that to us. What's more exciting, staying at home studying with you or going out with our bad boy friend who has his license and a fake ID?

    Do you see where I'm coming from?

    But of course there needs to be a really healthy balance between excitement and sensible. Excitement for me is harmless banter, Gossiping and Epic flirting. Sometimes, only bad boys will gossip and epically flirt with me. I've only just found out what I truly want a in a boyfriend, a partner. I know a lot of nice boys out there, but at the same time, a lot of them are too sensible and too nice. They're too nice to call me a whore when I playfully deserve it, they're too nice to gossip about Mary Jane with me, and they're too sensible to flirt and tease with me. Of course there is a limit, which is why the healthy balance is important. Where the line is placed is purely your friendships/relationships decision. 

    Don't think you need to be a bad boy to win our hearts over. You need to be yourself. And sometimes, being a "perfect gentleman" isn't human enough for us.

    Agree? Thoughts?

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Comments (28)

  • Kookoolee@xanga

    I like real gentlemen. I know most of my friends would rather a bad boy, but for me it's all about the manners and the intellect and the cultured perfection of a total geek. Mmmmm!!!!


    I can make excitement on my own! lol

  • Princess_Sakurina@xanga

    agreed, just the excitement :)
  • xx0behindthesmile@xanga

    i agree, but some guys (at least young) are bad boys even if they're being themselves. one guy i know who just turned 20 is a complete definition of bad boy, and he just doesn't care if a girl doesn't like him because of that. he'll find someone else. he's confident in it. but when he does go out with a girl he treats them well.


    i kinda like bad boys, i guess. when i'm at a party i love flirting with bad boys, and i like talking to them. but all the guys i end up dating are real good guys, gentlemen, nice, polite, not too dangerous.
  • miss_sonja_mia@xanga

    Agree completly.
    i need a genltemen otherwise I'll feel unloved. But I need a guy who can walk the line too. I'm so picky. But I tend to go more towards a straight bad boy than a straight gentlemen.
    I need danger, love, politness, playfulness. I like balence
  • astudyinemerald@xanga

    I think there are a couple components to the "bad boy" syndrome.

    1) Emotional manipulation--we want what we think we can't have. "Bad boys" come across as untouchable in a sense, and girls find that more attractive than the sweet guy that's all over them. As we get older, I think, we generally learn how to distinguish the silly show that bad boys put on and true confidence, which the nice guys (hopefully) have been developing.

    2) In line with what the OP said - Wanting someone interesting. Most younger guys, quite frankly, are not interesting--I would argue that our culture and school system actually encourages kids NOT to be interesting, which is a problem. Bad boys are more interesting, or at least they initially appear to be more interesting, then the average nice guy.

    I'm making huge generalizations here, of course--and in really has less to do with reality then it does perception. It doesn't need to be true for us to behave as if it is. Humans are frighteningly prone to seeing what we expect to see.
  • Jilofalltrades87@xanga

    I don't think it's excitement per se that draws women to bad boys. I think it's confidence. All women want a man who knows what he's doing, where he's going, and what he wants in life. Often the bad boys are cockier and more confident than the nice guys. The right recipe, really, is a nice guy with confidence, who will lead. 
  • JDE451@xanga

    From a guy's point of view (Meaning mine. I know, a little condescending...)

    I agree that girls look for the bad boys. But at certain times when they do meet a nice guy/gentlemen, they talk to them and get to know them, then that unknown factor comes in...They become such good friends with them! And that usually blocks the chances of them having a relationship due to them being friends. I'm speaking of course from experience, because I admit having feelings for some of my friends that are girls, but I quickly rebuff myself and remind myself that their my friends. But for some reason, that why it's sometimes hard to find a nice guy for girls when they're already friends with them...

    But that's just how I see it sometimes. Most of the times we're just idiots. I apologize :P
  • lot223@xanga

    lol i think when you're young, you want a bad boy. but as you get older, you realize a bad boy normally gets you no where and you look for stability. 
  • TheSecretLifeOfPandas@xanga
    Bad boys are fun. ;)
  • xourlastendeavorx@xanga

    Nice guys always finish last, and thanks to at first circumstances and now persona, I am not in their sad slow marching ranks. hehe
  • happyobligations@xanga

    I think girls date bad boys because they it feels so special when the bad boy is awful to others but so nice to them. 
  • xourlastendeavorx@xanga

    I am led to believe natural law is to blame. With so many bitches (men that is, ladies) out there, it makes the break from normalcy, with an Alpha, a much more lovely occurence. 
  • mynameisblueskye@xanga

    Thanks for clearing it up.

  • JusticeCho@xanga

    @astudyinemerald@xanga - Nice guys and confidence?  Not a very common combination, because as you said when girls are younger they look over the nice guys, which in turn lowers their self confidence.  So they miss out on all those years where the bad boys have been getting all the attention and building their confidence while the nice guys are in the back thinking "damn what is wrong with me...there must be something, why is it always the bad boys who get the attention..." creating lower and lower self esteem. Heh.

    The case with Sawyer, since he's the picture used, he's a bad boy towards everyone; however he would do anything to protect Kate or Juliet later on.  When he's in love he takes care of the person he loves even when he knows he can't be with them.  I think girls like that idea, but it generally turns out that bad boys are just bad in general...they get tired of the fact that it's not a novel type of relationship.  Then look for the guy with the stable job and nice car heh.  Being a guy though I have no real insight on why girls want a bad boy.
  • wenDiies@xanga

    It's true that bad boys bring excitement. However, most girls tend to stay with bad boys in the short-term, thats if they are looking for a nice guy. Bad boys knows what they are doing, they know what to say, when to flirt, how to act around you in order to get your attention.

  • Oh_Perkele@xanga

    Of...course...uh...we have to....see reason and such.....fuck it, I can't stop staring at the picture. I'll come back when I'm feeling more intelligent.


    *drools*
  • Izzy258@xanga

    @Oh_Perkele@xanga - haha sameee =] I love Sawyer!
  • LoveYouToDeath16@xanga

    I had my fair share of fun with the bad boys. Every girl should realize they are just temporary... nowadays, bad boys are unattractive to me because of what has happened in the past with them. Not that I want a "nice guy"... I just want a reasonable guy.
  • LoveYouToDeath16@xanga

    @Meowmeowkimmaee@xanga - Ha Ha good interpretation...
  • canadian_star@xanga
    In my experience, bad boys will eventually lose their thrill, if they don't dump you first. Find someone who excites your intellect, not just your emotions and hormones, and you'll never lack excitement.
  • wenguang@xanga

    I think most of you girls mistaken the bad boys' Arrogance for confidences!

    that's the only thing "nice guys" are missing.

    as for those girls that want to date bad boy while you are young and finally settle down for the nice guy as your biological clock is ticking, all I can say is Good luck b/c I certainly don't want a girl like you!

    I mean, who want a used and abused Pu**y that think of me as last choice. and please don't give me the "dating them as a learning lesson to finally know what you want in a guy" B.S.
  • ItsNona@xanga

    Joking or not, I don't want any man calling me a whore.
  • ItsNona@xanga

    @Jilofalltrades87@xanga - And good in bed! Don't forget that one.
  • tracezilla@lovelyish

    I prefer nice guys over bad boys. I have rarely met a bad boy who wasn't an asshole in some way. To me, being bad boy does not at all equate asshole.

    I agree with the balance thing you were talking about. Unfortunately, a lot of guys don't really seem to fall into that category of a good balance of both. Then again, everyone's preferences and idea of "balance" would be different, so maybe that's just my own experience. :p
  • tracezilla@lovelyish

    @ItsNona@xanga - I definitely agree. "Whore" is not a word that I want to be called, I don't care if he thinks its playful. Its just inappropriate and offensive. :/

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