Tuesday, 01 December 2009

  • Do Jerks Deserve One Another?



    So, I was watching Nip/Tuck the other day and the current plot line involves a plastic surgeon, Christian and his beau, former porn star Kimber.  The two have broken up and gotten back together throughout the series.  The last breakup, resulted in Kimber becoming pregnant by Christian's son and marrying said son.  And, Christian, thinking he had cancer married his best friend and anesthesiologist.  Christian upon learning that the cancer alarm was false promptly broke up with his friend.  Kimber in her first positive relationship of the series was dating a young doctor who made it readily apparent that he would've done anything for her.  So Kimber, a jerk, left a perfect guy, 6 pack abs and total dedication to her.  And, Christian left his best friend, the only woman who had seen past his total dirt bag ways, and even put her own interests aside to care for him and his son, when he was at his worst, throwing up from cancer medication, and unable to walk without severe pain.

    The question I was left with, is do jerks always come back to one another? My story is strikingly similar. I am currently dating my best friend she is great for me and with me.  We make a great team.  With her I have accomplished more than I could have otherwise.  Others whom I have loved, remind me of the scene in Nip/Tuck where Christian took a line of cocaine off of Kimber's naked bum during a sexual romp.  It was fiery, passionate, but altogether destructive. 

    But the question still remains, do jerks ultimately come back to one another? Leaving damaged otherwise perfect, and good people in their trail back to one another? If having to choose between a destructive but fun relationship  and one that made sense, but just made sense without the accompanying "butterflies" and sensual passion that comes along with many destructive relationships-- which would you choose?

    Marital bliss with your perfectly logical mate-- or -- fleeting powerful emotions with a temptress?

Comments (24)

  • MsKittyCatty@xanga

    Jerks are the only ones who can stand eachother usually. They come back to eachother usually too if they break up.

  • Gorrific@xanga

    I have the best of both worlds.  A guy who completes me and understands me, and still gives me butterflies after three years.

  • AphoticxIllusion@xanga

    is this some sort of soap opera. 

  • RandomCitizen25@xanga

    I don't really think you can classify anyone as a JERK but I think there is a base there.
    If you want to have a relationship you have to be similar, or else it just wont work out

  • T0m03@xanga

    Love isn't logical. Just because someone is good for you and treats you right doesn't necessarily mean you're going to love that person.

  • unabridgedtales@xanga

    There needs to be a logic/emotion balance for most relationships to work. Relationships founded only on what 'makes sense' and 'logic' end up lacking passion and becoming boring, but relationships based solely on emotional intrigue can't hold up because of the volatile nature of emotions.

  • utoppia@xanga
    Well they sure don't deserve nice people! I've met some grade-A jerks before and @MsKittyCatty@xanga -  is right. Only jerks can stand being around jerks.
  • shoujo@xanga

    Sometimes people can't ignore the chemistry between them, no matter how destructive or bad it is for the both of them. That doesn't necessarily mean they are jerks -- it just means that they are messed up in the head and don't know how to deal with relationships that are destined to be doomed from the start.

  • kor_girl@xanga

    one of my exes and i had a fierce, passionate but all around self-destructive relationship. he had an anger management issue and I had more single guy friends than girlfriends, which drove him through fits of anger and inevitably becoming jealous, insecure and all around needy, thus only resulting me having "fun evening" outs with my buddies who can entertain me and give me the platonic attention i so craved. in all of my relationships, the one I had with THAT guy is unforgettable, we fought like cats and dogs but we always went back to each other UNTIL one day, he didn't want to be suffocating me any longer and I couldn't keep up the break up and get back together game anymore. we were both tired. it had to end.


    the relationship RIGHT after that one, my regretful so called rebound, was a guy who was a "logical" choice for me to date but gave me NOTHING in terms of chemistry or butterflies. It soon ended at my end because it wasn't going anywhere!! I think people justify the reasons of getting back to each other in the ideal pretense of the word "LOVE" but i don't think that's always the case. Even between jerks, one is more secure than the other for whatever the reason is and the "weaker hand" will always live with that sense of insecurity and the instability of the relationship. Even between jerks, they hurt each other, inevitably ending the relationship and hurting NICE people when they date later. 
  • MissPixieGlitter@xanga

    ... i don't think they're jerks for wanting to be with each other. breakups happen, and unless they're cheating on other people, they're not wrong for breaking up with them in favor of each other.

  • linnelleum@xanga

    I chose the healthy relationship realizing that in the long run I would have way more happiness than the fleeting moments of a destructive high, especially when you consider that the high comes with the painful consequences of short-sighted decisions.

  • LaChienne88@xanga

    I'd rather be with my logically compatible mate. I don't like dealing with passions and emotions.

    I've said this before... or thought about it. Jerks deserve each other.
    It sometimes baffles me when I see a good guy with a bad girl or a bad boy with a good girl.
    I'm like, WTF?
    Why don't the "bad" people be together? They're more compatible. Like, the asshole, bitchy women should be with the jerky men. But I also sometimes think jerks tend to prey upon people they think they can control.

    If jerks ended up with each other, then the world would at least be more tolerable to the rest of us.

  • dork936@xanga

    strong feelings with a mate.
    that burning passion can only do one thing, burn out.

    also; props for mentioning nip/tuck
    not only do i own every season available, i've never missed an episode.
    it's my anti-drug. hahahahaha.

  • XbabyK@xanga

    It's easy to say that two people whom you think are not so good (ie jerks) deserve each other.  It wouldn't make too much sense to say that a jerk deserves a nice sweet girl.  You see that a lot too though... someone with someone else that just doesn't make sense in your head.  As for you own relationship, only you know what's best for you and you need to find what's best for you in a package that you can deal with.

  • JennyGee@xanga

    i hope jerks wind up flocking to one another, because then hopefully they won't wind up with me!

  • JennyGee@xanga

    @AphoticxIllusion@xanga - ...why are you even on this site?

  • AphoticxIllusion@xanga
  • JusticeCho@xanga

    Eh maybe.  I think situations depend on the individuals.  Druggies will probably go back to one another though, in reference to the snorting cocaine off Kimbers butt.

    Plus I don't think Kimber is a jerk.  At least not in her depiction this season.  She really tried to like Mike, but she seems to have always been deeply in love with Christian.  Christian is a jerk, and telling her that he would marry her and still loves her right after Mike proposed would put anyone in her situation in a pickle.

  • immcupidi

    @MsKittyCatty@xanga - Yeah you would think, but I don't know.  I am a self-proclaimed jerk, and I still have "good girl magnetism."  And usually good girls are willing to put up with a heck of alot more than a female who is a jerk would.

  • immcupidi

    @AphoticxIllusion@xanga - even better.. you should check the show out some time it comes on FX.

  • angelwingfive@xanga

    Love is something that can only be given and given again in turn. If something is one-sided or someone just takes, that's not love. It's just that no one's come up with a good name for it yet.

  • AphoticxIllusion@xanga

    @immcupidi - it doesn't sound very amusing.

  • veretina@xanga

    HMM DESTRUCTIVE RELATIONSHIPS ARE ALWAYS MORE FUN.. I SEEM TO ONLY HAVE THOSE TYPE OF RELATIONSHIPS! 

  • tracezilla@lovelyish

    Genuine jerks do deserve each other, as far as I'm concerned. But, they're usually too alike for anything to last, which is why they drag nice, or at least "normal" people into their crap. Then again, I have to say if someone keeps letting themselves be drug back in, I can't help but think that on some level they deserve what they get, too. Gullibility is only an excuse for so long...

  • Choose Identity

  • Give eProps (?)

  • New! You can now edit your comments for 15 minutes after submitting.

About the Author

Who recommended?