Okay, there are a few ladies I know who really need this advice.
The best revenge on an ex (or someone you wanted to date) is to live an awesome life, get hotter, and then start dating someone equally awesome.
Seriously.
I'm not joking.
Please, just go out and be as awesome as possible.
NOTE.
This does NOT work if you've already gone down the crazy path.
To avoid the crazy path, I'm giving you some tips. Read them. If you don't already know them, memorize and apply. I've been friends with crazy girls, I've been victimized by my hubby's psycho ex, and I've watched friends deal with crazy girls. Please don't become one. If you are already, stop it.
If someone says to stop calling them.......you shouldn't call anymore. (this is especially important if they have already blocked your number. or five of your numbers.)If he has a new girlfriend.......don't call her either. (Also. Don't email her, myspace her, facebook her, twitter her, show up at her house, or smash in her headlights.)If he's having a party........don't show up unless you're invited. (Seriously, don't. Everyone at that party is laughing at you. Everyone.)DO. NOT. DRUNK. DIAL. (You'll sound even sadder than you think. Promise.)No one can be stolen. He left you. Get over it. (It's sad, I know. But people aren't property. He was ready and willing. Probably just looking for an out. Sorry. Be mad at him, not his new girlfriend.)If he cheats on you....you cannot be mad if you cheated too. (Seriously, I shouldn't have to say this. Clearly, you are both sluts. Quit bitching and go get your snatch tested.)Do not concoct elaborate schemes to "win him back". You will not "win him back", you will "win yourself a restraining order".
(He probably doesn't ever want you back. And why do you want him back? He isn't treating you well, and maybe has a new girl. Give yourself more respect than that.)If he's married, and not to you....the relationship is clearly over.
If you spent his wedding day sobbing....get Prozac.
Unless he married a hooker out of the blue, you knew it was coming. Your life should not revolve around marriage, nor should it revolve around your ex, and it should especially not revolve around your ex's marriage.
If lots of people are coming up to you commenting on your crazy post breakup behavior.....you were too crazy. Now you get to live out the consequences. (If you've acted this crazy, you went too far. No rumor could hold that much weight. You were just a crazy ho. Leave town, or at least find a new dating circle, because you are forever marred by this title.) (Seriously. It doesn't go away.)
Everyone gets a breakup grace period, in which it is acceptable to grieve. This period, however, is a month, two or three TOPS. After that, get Prozac and shut up about it. It's over. (If you were married, you get as much time as you want.)
(I may be mistaken, but no man I've ever spoken to has said "cries herself to sleep every night about her ex" as a quality they would like in a woman. Feel free to prove me wrong, though.)
I would like to make this clear:
No one is to blame for your post-breakup behavior except yourself.If you are being a crazy girl....seriously. We need to fix this. I hate crazy girls. And I hate how crazy girls think that their ex's new girl/lover/wife is to blame. And apparently smashing my headlights will get you guys back together.
Go out with your friends. Cut your hair. Sit at home and drink wine. Start knitting. Get wasted at the bar and take home a new guy. Adopt 50 cats. I don't care, just get a life of your own. You do exist outside of a relationship. If you don't realize that, you aren't mature enough to be in one anyway.
And again. If you're bitter and angry...get awesome, get hotter. Best. revenge. ever.
(Final note: It is not okay to call, text, email, or otherwise attempt to contact an ex of multiple years who is now married to "make things right". He does not care, I promise you, and his wife definitely does not appreciate it. You are only doing it for your own self validation or because you still have a ridiculous glimmer of hope for the non-relationship. After years pass, apologies are only for the benefit of the apologizer. Don't be selfish.)
Have you ever been the "crazy girl," or have you had a crazy ex who continued to call, text, or e-mail you post-breakup?
True
Comments (87)
There's this kind of crazy girl, and the crazy girls IN the relationship. I.E., the girlfriend who takes her boyfriends phone so she can look at and then respond to everyone who tries contacting him, and freaks out when a girl tries talking to him, etc. Those kind of girls are no good either. Crazy is just no good all around.
crazy is usually ALWAYS bad no mater what phase of the relationship you're in.
"No one can be stolen. He left you. Get over it."
Love that. Have seen some pretty crazy girls out there... All very insecure. Good tips :)
i love this. i've never been a "crazy girl". then again, i've never been dumped, i've been in three relationships, and the only relationship i've been in that i actually count/care about is my current, 3-some year one ... but i doubt i would be the psycho-ex, anyway, in practice. it's just not my personality; i don't reveal my emotions that easily. so, even if i had the mind of a psycho-ex, i would made damn sure nobody ever knew about it. if anything, i've gotten complaints from my current boyfriend about seeming too distant at times and needing too much space. i'm trying to work on being less distant, and making more time for him in between the busi-ness of my personal hobbies, because i DO love him very much, i'm just uncomfortable with being showy about it, plus, well, i'm human and i DO like my me-time, i just like it a bit too much sometimes.
anyway, /tangent. my point was simply that that goes to show, that both extremes are bad. at least WITHIN a relationship. there is a healthy balance between showing your love for somebody and smothering them. post-breakup, however, there is no balance. you veer very far to the not-caring side of the road, and stay there. especially if (s)he's with somebody else. leave well enough alone, and find somebody who wants YOU. i've told this many a time to MY psycho-ex, and, two years later, after a one-month relationship between us, he still won't quit. i've had my boyfriend yell at him. i've had my mom yell at him. i've told him as politely as possible that i only went out with him when my boyfriend and i were on the only break we ever had, and hopefully ever will have (and even if, for some reason, we do break up, i would become a spinstress before i'd ever date him again), two years ago. that he was rebound for me. i've apologized for hurting him. he STILL won't quit, and insists that i am REALLY in love with him, that he is my real boyfriend - my current boyfriend is only manipulating me, and why can't i see that? when i don't answer calls, emails or IM's, he comes looking for me, and then proceeds to sob, or occasionally threaten my life or my boyfriend's life when i tell him there is nothing between us. he so won't quit that i've had two restraining orders, and he still spent half the night last night waking me up, bombarding my phone with calls until i finally realized i could put him on automatic reject, so i might need a third.
NOTE TO ALL PSYCHO-EX'S OUT THERE: DON'T DO THIS SHIT. JUST STOP IT. LISTEN TO THE LADY UP THERE, WHO WROTE THIS POST. IF YOU DO THIS, YOU WILL MOST CERTAINLY BE THE PERSON WHO IS EIGHTY YEARS OLD WITH TOO MANY CATS TO COUNT.
the end.
lol @ winning a restraining order.
total win right there.
Haha, this is great!! This actually reminds me of a friend I used to have in college. We were freshmen in college, and I think he was a junior. It was like April or May--I think it was May. But anyway, he said he was going to go to the gas station with a friend of his (who was a girl, and who was also our (my friend and I) mutual friend.) Now, the gas station is just down the street from the campus, and it doesn't take that long to get there at all. So he says he'll be back at a certain time, and he'll call her when he got back. But when that certain time had come and passed, she still hadn't heard anything from him. I guess what she really wanted to know was if he would actually call her when she got back.
So, we waited for a few minutes, and then she decides we should go to go to his apartment (which is on-campus) and wait for him. So we get to his building, and she decides to wait for him in the floor right above his apartment-- that way we could see him when he got back (they're sort of open-air apartments, so we could see the parking lot, and we could hear if someone was coming up, or going into their room). We ended up waiting for a while, maybe 20 minutes or so. We took pictures and stuff, and finally they (our mutual friend and my friend's boyfriend) get back. We see them go into his apartment together, and that was that. He didn't call her, and she got super pissed, called him, and told him off, and we ended up going to see another guy (her friend) that worked in a building on campus, so she could vent to him.
I though it was crazy, but I went along for the ride, because it was something to do, and she was my friend. But I guess she got what she came there for in the end.
There are crazy guys out there too, let's not forget them. My old best friend of 12 years has one of those crazy guys as a boyfriend. He would constantly get jealous if she and I spent anytime together(which was hard to avoid since we were roommates) and accused her of being a lesbian because we were best friends. When they broke up he stalked her, and left stuffed animals at our doorstep and sent flowers. Not to mention the numerous calls, texts, myspace messages...etc...etc. He even showed up at her moms funeral and tried to win her back WTF!
in the end she went back to him for whatever reason....
So it's not just the girls!
It doesn't do well to be crazy people. No one will like you.
this is SO true! after i broke up with my ex i did exactly what you're supposed to do (irregardless of the fact i was completely heartbroken): broke any and all contact, ditched all mementos, got a second job to fill up my free time and make more money, moved into a better place, lost weight, and found an awesome boyfriend. he on the other hand started dating some psychotic chick, they broke up, and he moved back in with his parents, and now he's been bugging me for months to get me back even though i'm still with aforementioned awesome boyfreind. it really felt AMAZING to be like "sorry!! i'm happy now!! have a nice life!!" LOL.
turn off the crazy and just be awesome!!!
pearls before swine girl...they wont listen. to crazy girls this behavior u speak of is both necessary and expected. they cant even help it.they are crazy lol
this is funny! Good tips!
Lol. Epic.
I've seen girls grieving over guys they've been dating for like a week.
O_o it's like, dude you made out every day for a couple of weeks, and you're that beat up about it? Rofl. I hate crazy sluts.
totally agree with everything you said:)
The best revenge on an ex (or someone you wanted to date) is to live an awesome life, get hotter, and then start dating someone equally awesome.
^^^hell yeah
my ex and his current gf came to my house, & wanted to TALK to me @@ apparently i spread rumors about her - about how she is the 3rd person and somehow break us up =.= after a good year into my new relationship
I loved the go get your snatch checked part. hahaha
Haha, that sounds like how one of my boyfriend's exes acted until she met me. =]
I've been called a crazy ex before, but I've never done any of that!
My problem is that when my ex and I started getting back together, I would get very mad over things he lied to me about and then posted about online to somehow make me look like the bad guy. For instance, he sent me a text on my birthday of an online link to something totally unrelated to my birthday. I tried several times to talk to him, but he kept ignoring me. He knew it would make me mad, and that is what he wanted to achieve because of our argument the night before. When I yelled at him for it, he went on facebook to make ME out to be the bad guy. And here is where the crazy part comes in- I commented on it in bitchy, scathing manner. Seems that people don't like that and characterize it as crazy.
But I've been a little legitimately crazy lately, I'll admit. After I caught him hitting on his other ex, he blocked me out of his life completely. Every once in awhile, I text him in hopes he'll answer one of my many brooding questions. He did say he no longer had feelings for that ex, yet here he was displaying it to the world how he felt about her even now. I know he no longer wants me in his life. He's made that VERY clear by blocking me, but I still feel like I deserve honesty. Hopefully, this feeling goes away. It's been a month now. :/
I really really like this post, especially the part about "The best revenge on an ex (or someone you wanted to date) is to live an awesome life, get hotter, and then start dating someone equally awesome"
Well written. Good job!
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Wow this entire post could be applied to my husbands psychotic ex girlfriend. She calls, when we change our numbers she finds a way to get BOTH of them and has her friends harrass me while she keeps trying to get in contact with him, she doesn't listen when we've both said multiple times for her to not contact either of us for any reason what-so-ever and she tried dating one of his friends just to try and make him jealous long after he was already engaged to me. Oh! And she's tried the pitiful "I'm sorry to you and your wife for --". She cheated on him, he tried to forgive her, she did it again and then I walked into his life so he left her for me. We got married (and no I'm not a prostitute or a whore in general) so she really needs to get the hint.
Would it be totally and completely messed up for me to unblock her and send this to her? Haha thanks for this post! Made my day.
This is a great post! The best thing to do is move on with your life.
GOD I HATE CRAZY EXES. i've never had one and i've never been one but exes of exes have been stellar.
Ha Ha! I LOVE this post!
There should be a picture of my roommate with this post...she is the textbook definition of "crazy ex."
"(Also. Don't email her, myspace her, facebook her, twitter her, show upat her house, or smash in her headlights.)"
A psycho bitch found me on his myspace and started shit with me. She was so damn pathetic. I've never met someone so childish in my life. The funny thing is she has been going around telling people that I'm the one who started shit with her when she should have just let go a long time ago.
They've been broken up since 2005 and she knew he would never get him back exclusively, but she's a psycho and causes all of this drama, lmao. Some girls give girls a really bad name.
this post makes me think about my ex's behavior
he even called my best friend and told her if i don't answer the phone he will throw himself on the window -____-
gosh 9.9