Sunday, 15 November 2009
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The Teacher-Student Relationship
As a high schooler, I pretty much spend my life in school. Last year I had this teacher who was a little weird. He kind of picked on me and a few other girls, but nothing that I couldn't handle. So I suffered through the year and just hoped that I wouldn't get him as a teacher again.
But things never happen the way we want. I have him again this year. And he decided that was his invitation to harass me constantly. Within the first week of school he started complementing my clothing choices. One day at school, we had doomsday as part of a spirit week for our big rivalry game. (Everyone wears all black.) My outfit was completed with fishnets and a rather short black skirt. I walked into this teachers class and sat down at my desk in the front row. The bell rang and he comes up to my desk and says, "This may cross a boundary, but you look hot in black." I got mad and told him that it was totally inappropriate and the rest of the class agreed with me.
Another time he called me a whore because I was wearing a "Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy" shirt.
Last class he told me that I was one of his favorites and that he ranked me as one of his kids. I got really freaked out. And I don't know what to do. I'm pretty sure this is illegal in some way. Is this something I should be worried about or am I overreacting? Has this happened to anyone else? How did you deal with it?
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- From: boy_crazy
- Name: boy_crazy
- About Me: I'm 16. I love me! I'm amazing and crazy so deal with it! :)
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Comments (109)
You're not overreacting. I would talk to some sort of authority about this dude, 'cause he's being totally inappropriate.
No way, you are not overreacting! If he doesn't have the boundaries to know that students should not be spoken to in such a manner, then he shouldn't be a teacher. You should report this to a higher authority, or at least threaten to if he doesn't stop. You have witnesses!
i'm not sure if it's illegal or not, but it can sure as hell get him fired because it's not apropriate at all. You are in the right. He just wants you to go along with it in the hope of getting good grades, if you callenge it, he will probably drop little hints that it will affect your grades. don't let it go any further. don't fall into the trap. talk to him, give him ONE more chance. if he behaves in ways that make you unconfortable again, get his pervy ass fired.
Report this to your building principal immediately. Teachers are obligated to remain professional and there is a line that teachers DO NOT CROSS and your teacher has not only crossed that line he's dancing like a maniac on the wrong side of it. I'm 2 semesters shy of graduating with my BA in English Education (work in progress) and there's nothing more strongly emphasized than for us all to be professional.
Teachers are role-models, model citizens, mentors, guides, the beacon of light on cloudy days, or whatever metaphorical phrase works best, but they ARE NOT to harass students or otherwise be disrespectful, inappropriate, or engage in questionable behaviors with students or parents or fellow teachers. It's that simple. This should not continue on, your teacher should not be making you uncomfortable and if there's any doubt in your mind that he's doing something wrong then report it to your building principal because who knows what he might be saying/doing with other students. Someone has to come forward; these are the types of situations best nipped in the bud... don't wait for it to blossom into something more severe.
Report him.
Definitely inform the counselor.
A clear case of harassment. The other students can definitely vouch for you.
One week he had called me cute and perky and it had freaked me out, no matter what way he was trying to say it.
Later on the day he called me perky he sent me to the counselors for talking when he told me to stop talking. I only continued to talk because the other kid that he told to not talk was still talking aswell, but only I got sent to the counselors.
I was so pissed that he even sent me and shocked that I forgot to tell the counselor the things he said about me. (She kept talking about my educational future)
It wasn't long before all the kids made him quit. He couldn't handle us and we soon got another teacher and then our regular English teacher came back and she was such a bitch I loved it.
I had another English teacher later who I got along with great and all the girls had a crush on him. I wrote an essay about how its better to be called pretty rather than hot and he liked it a lot. Then as I was leaving class he called me beautiful.
Even tho I liked him and he was younger it didn't make me feel any less uncomfortable than the previous teacher. I think teachers should keep their comments to themselves. It could get them into a lot of trouble whether they be a joke or serious.
Okay, seriously, as a teacher myself, I'm appalled. Your teacher is crossing a boundary in a big way. You wouldn't do this to a stranger, let alone a student. Report him to your principal. Immediately. There's no reason for this kind of behavior from a teacher. You should never feel harassed in school by a teacher. That's just horrible.
-Katie
as pretty much everyone said, take it up with an authority. This is unacceptable. period.
fishnets with mini skirt does scream whore who loves attention and your logo tshirt with the cowboy phrase also screams whore. everyone in the class was probably silently thinking that you look like a whore, but he blurted it out loud. it is inappropriate and should not have said it out loud.
Completely inappropriate. Report him.
I had a perverted teacher too. He was an obese elderly English teacher.. We never did anything. I regret that now.
This is completely inappropriate. Props to you for sticking up for yourself! In this situation it is best to first inform the teacher that you don't appreciate his comments (which you did). It's possible that a teacher may not know that they're making the student feel uncomfortable, so it's good to let them know first so they have the opportunity to alter their behavior. Since your teacher didn't change his behavior, the next step would be to talk to administration. First get your parents' advice: they should know what's going on in your school, and their support will be useful. I would start by talking to a guidance counselor, and depending on how that meeting goes, talk to the principle. It would be useful to find out if there are other girls that have received comments from him, because they can help you bring light to the issue with your teacher. Good luck!
well you see..
situations like this is how .. 3+ male teachers and 1 substitute teacher got banned from my middle school.
it really is inappropriate and you should probably talk to someone at a higher level jurisdiction about it. Nothing is going to happen untill you say something
TELL SOMEONE! That guy is totally crossing his boundaries. If you don't say anything no one will know. =/ I hope you get your problem fixed.
Like everyone else, I believe that you should report him. If he thinks that its appropriate to treat you this way, then he's probably doing similar things to other students. I think he should get fired for this; students should never feel uncomfortable with a teacher because of things like this.
I'd like to know what you end up doing, and how it plays out :)
I'm pretty sure, him sexually harrassing you is NOT part of his job description. Keep a notebook to record dates, times and innnappropriate gestures and comments.
Yes it probably is illegal, if you are underage. Yes it is a firable offense, but like everything these days, you must have evidence!
Yes, report your teacher to your principal. He is definitely wrong for bringing up things like that to you.
But I really don't think your choice of clothing is helping the matter at all. You shouldn't be wearing "Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy" shirts in high school, or miniskirts and fishnets, for that matter. That is something that should be kept outside of school. One thing you should take into consideration is the image you give off by your clothes. Your described outfits aren't really the best image-makers, if you know what I mean.
@pandy - It doesn't matter what everyone was thinking. He is her teacher. He is paid to teach students and has a code of conduct that he must live by when on the job!
a teacher should NOT make his or her students uncomfortable or feel unsafe, he's not being a professional and you have every right to alert higher ups. get help.
@BelisaAmbrose@xanga - he was inappropriate and wrong and should know better. however, the school's dress code might also need to be stricter regarding skirt length, midriff, cleavage, inappropriate logos/words on clothes, etcetera. in my high school, some students, usually guys, who wore inappropriate logos on their tshirts were sent to the office and told to change their shirt or put a temporary shirt over it. this teacher at my school was caught taking pictures of girls and expelled for a time period but he came back. if boy students whistled at girl students, then can that be reported as harrassment?
@pandy - This was not a boy student. This was an Adult Male Teacher. He would have been taught a code of conduct when dealing with female students when he was inducted. He also would have had to sign that as a legal clause to his employment. Being an Adult and Emplyee means that he is expected to have greater control over his feelings and his actions. His behaviour is unacceptable.
@BelisaAmbrose@xanga - I understand his behavior has an adult and teacher is unacceptable. but I meant that if a boy student made inappropriate comments or whistled at her, would she also report all of them just the same? just because a girl dresses sexy doesn't give others the right to make rude comments but why did she dress like a whore for spirit week is what I'm wondering about? lol
@pandy - No. If a boy student had whistled at her, the school probably would have addressed both bad behaviour, ie her dressing provokitively and him whistling. But the teacher is worse because he is paid not just to teach, not just to set an example, but also to protect his students.