An open rant about how much I hate it when guys NEVER call back:
I can not stand it when you're in the middle of a conversation with a guy and then out of the blue they go; "Hey can I call you right back?" so you stop your conversation and say "Okay." or whatever then you wait around until they decide to call you back, or they don't at all. I don't know about you, But I'm tired of it.
For example last night; I was on the phone with my boyfriend Dylan and we were on the phone for a good 2 hours, then he just goes "Hey honey can I call you right back?" and I was like "Okay babe." well due to the fact that his father recently passed away he randomly gets depressed at night and I just thought he was going to have one of his moments and call me back. Boy was I wrong. So when we got off the phone it was around 12:30 am, so I got onto the computer to distract myself; because you know if you just sit around and wait by your phone you go completely insane. So around 2am, I decide I'm going to sleep; he isn't calling back. Then when I wake up in the morning, no text telling me he's sorry or anything; and I was like 'Ugh, he's such a man!"
They never ever call back when they say they are going to. But if us, girls do that, all hell breaks loose. They're like "What were you doing that you couldn't call me back?" or "Who were you with?" and if you say that you fell asleep or something they're like "Uh huh, sure." and then they get mad at you. But if you get mad at them for it they're like "Well you know I don't even really like talking on the phone anyways. Like a typical man. Which just triggers a fight, over something as small as calling us back and just saying "I'm going to bed." If they don't want to talk on the phone, why don't they just say so? I don't get it.
But if you wait around until they call you, and you don't distract yourself all you do is just stare at your phone. Even if you don't want to admit it, you do. You sit there and keep checking your phone. You're like "Maybe I didn't hear it ring." or "Is the ringer even on?" then if you get up to do something as soon as you sit down you check your phone because you're like "I think he called!" But then as soon as you check it; he didn't. Or you check it every five seconds because you're checking the time, because you know his schedule. Another example the one day I was waiting for Dylan to call me and it was around 3 and I was already done with my classes and I was like "Hm, he gets out of school at 3, he has track at 4 and he doesn't get home from track until around 6:30 or 7...so around 8 I'll get a call?" You know, stupid girl things.
I don't care how old you are, you will always wait for a guy to never call. I'm 19 years old, and my boyfriend says he's going to call, I'll do other things to distract me until he wants to call me back if he does. But regardless, you can deny it but you know in some way or form you are waiting for a guy to call you. For another example, I was watching this Disney Show with my 9 year old Niece Deenna; Phineas and Ferb. Their sister Candace I think her name is, was waiting for a call from the boy she likes and she was driving herself insane waiting for him to call and I was like "Wow this is so true." and not even three hours later; I found myself in the same exact situation. Though in the show, the sister was trying to do a math problem to figure out when the guy is going to call her because he said 'I'll call you right back." and then later in the show he calls her and then he goes to hang up and goes "I'll call you back in a few minutes; in result she does another math problem and she was like "THAT MEANS HE'LL NEVER CALL!" and I was like "Ha, sounds about right."
Then again, if you don't wait and you go out with your friends and he calls and you miss the call and don't call them back they get all pissy and they're like "Why didn't you call me back?" and you're just like "Ughhhh." because it's like the circle is inverted. Because you distracted yourself instead of sitting around your house waiting for them to call, so you went out; they called and you didn't call them back to give them a taste of their own medicine. I gave Dylan the taste of his own medicine back in August. My sister had her baby, and I was at the hospital with her and I told him I'd call him when I got to the hospital so we could plan when I could go over his house after I left. Well I decided "I'm going to make him wait." so I never called him; then the next day when I was back at the hospital he calls me and was like "Why didn't you call me last night? I was waiting for you to call." and I was like 'I was busy and forgot. Sorry." What I should of said was "HAHAHA NOW YOU KNOW HOW I FEEL!" But I didn't, I went with the simple answer.
Now apologies that's another issue! I don't know about your men, but all of my other boyfriends never apologized about never calling. But Dylan is pretty good about not calling back. Like the last time he did that before last night he was like "I'm really sorry I didn't call you back. I feel bad." then I didn't stay mad at him, so he's usually really good about apologizing about not calling back. But my other old boyfriends, they NEVER would apologize. And that pissed me off so bad. We apologize when we do something wrong, but I think that's another man code to never apologize. My friend's boyfriend James said "Apologizing is a sign of weakness." I was like "That's the attitude James." So maybe that's why they never apologize?
Regardless, I hate it when men never call. I just needed to rant. What do you think? Does your boyfriend/crush/fiance do that to you? How do you react to it? Give me your feed back.
DISCLAMER: This is not a "I hate male dominance" rant, this is a rant about how much I hate it when men NEVER call us back.
Comments (117)
If he doesn't call you back after a while, couldn't you call him back? I've actually never had this issue with a guy, but that's what I would do if it happened to me.
well, i can say the same thing about women. i could have written this and just changed the gender. but your point is well taken.
i always call my girlfriend right back. i never hang up to do anything, though, so i never need to.
@steph - I think that the ranter might be tired of having to call her boyfriend back every time he forgets to?...It does get kinda stalkerish if one is constantly calling their SO...
Whenever i hear a male saying that, I would not expect them to call back lol. Cus i know they won't. And when i say "a male", it includes my dad ;)
@proudsmartypants@xanga - Well, if it seems annoying to her boyfriend for her to constantly call him back, then maybe it would make a point to show him how annoying it is for him to consistently not call her back.
Ermm... I don't think it's a guy generic quality. Both guys and girls can be flaky and what not.
On top of that I think you should learn to be straight forward with your SO and tell him directly that when he says, "I'll call you back" -- he should do exactly that. And yea, exactly as what someone said before, you could just call him back yourself.
I had a relationship that ended when the phone calls ended. It hurt me quite abit since I liked the guy considerably and I was really interested in taking the relationship further along.
The fact that they don't call shows they're either careless, aloof, or just don't care enough. Better to figure out which one it is early on.
lol almost every girl that i've gone out with or dated has done this to me. i don't think it's a "men only" thing. i do the same ONCE in a while. usually though i'm good with calling back. i'm sure it's just the short term memory thing (girls have this too). we just get preoccupied with what we're doing or dealing with that it slips our minds. or maybe something happens or someone else calls or someone msgs or you get caught up with a tv show or something.
I think you should tell him, "If you're not going to call me back, don't say you will." I would make that point clear.
I also think you should stop obsessing over your phone calls.
Yeah, its annoying when you have to wait for a phone call or AIM when someone said they will contact you. I feel you.But you're in a relationship, aren't you entitled to call him too? Tell him you hate it when he does that rather than do the "NOW YOU KNOW HOW I FEEL" revenge thing. Its not healthy for a relationship.
Sometimes "I'll call you back" is the simplest way to get rid of a person.
That's a bit of rant you had there and I can't say I agree with you. You can just call him back, you can take the initiative, and you can stop waiting around for him to call. If it bugs you so much, tell him so.
"Call you back," is a loose term to say the least. When I say "I'll call you back," that does not automatically mean "I'm going to call you back in exactly sixty seconds." Most of the time if I'm busy enough to need to hang up on someone, it usually means you're going to wait at least half an hour for a phone call.
lol... I rarely call people back. oops :)
It doesn't matter how old you are or who you're with, this is always the case.
sorry for that, we just forget things all the time. But we forget to call, that don't mean we forget about you... (my girlfriend reading over my shoulder told me to put a capital S at the beginning, i just can't, that's too much for me
)
i don't like the "typical man" assumptions, but i do hate when people don't return calls what they say they will.
I used to do this to my ex where I would tell her I'd call her back, and ultimately there were cases where I wasnt able to or just didnt. So I can see your frustration, but I think you're getting a tad obsessive and selfish. I'm not one to point out any negatives on people's posts, but for one you already acknowledged the passing of his father. That's a pretty big deal, and if he needs time alone then give it to him. I'm sure you want to be there for him, but the more you stress that fact, the more it might possibly push him away if he just wants his alone time.
In my situation, I just never liked talking on the phone if there wasnt anything to say. My ex and I would be silent, and I would get irritated, because I didnt like holding the phone while there were other things to do, so in the end I'd tell her I'd call her back so I could just take care of other things, but I didnt want to hurt her feelings...like, you're boring me so I dont want to talk. Try to take it easy, your relationship isnt based on your phone calls, at least in my opinion.
While the issue of saying you'll call and not is really annoying, this post bothers me. Mainly because of this line:
"For example last night; I was on the phone with my boyfriend Dylan and we were on the phone for a good 2 hours.."
Ummmmmmmmmmmmm ahah, you were on the phone for two hours. It's 1230 in the morning, he probably got depressed and fell asleep, and giving his situation, I really think this one should be excusable. May be if yall had only been on the phone like 10 minutes you'd have a legitimate reason to be pissed.
i totally agree with this.. :[ it makes me feel all desperate and stuff cuz i'm constantly checking my phone for a call back or a text or something.. now, i check once and just go, "he's not calling back. fuck this, i'm sleeping." :] then he gets all defensive when i ask the next day what happened.. ahhh.. :] humans. haha.
I've never had this happene to me before, but it does sound annoying x: .
Call him back sometimes?
Girls do that all the time too. I'm probably more guilty than most...er maybe not I just don't answer the phone when someone calls. But if you get me talking on the phone I stay on until you get off.
Never had this problem. I was the one who left the conversation and then my ex had to call me back, asking why I didn't call back. loll. But I totally understand the feeling of going through his schedule and wondering when he will call. But usually, if he didn't, then I would send him a text (: I took chargeeee. Sometimes it makes me feel desperate when I constantly check my phone, but luckily now I DON'T HAVE TO. SINGLE AND LOVING IT<3 No more mind gamesss and wondering until I go insane! ):
I'd text him, or facebook him, or email him, or somethin' and just say "hey, it's late, I'm goin' to bed, I've gotta function tomorrow. Love you."
Because sometimes, things come up. I know that as his girlfriend, you should be more important than most things, but you've just gotta be understanding. The guy's dad just passed away for pete's sake!
@AtLeastWereStillAlive@xanga - I was thinking the same thing...I know when I get depressed I really don't call people or text them, even if I'm close to them. It's something that happens, give him a break if he's been getting depressed, chances are he probably did just space it