Sunday, 01 November 2009
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Too Old for Butterflies
ChemistryNo, not the kind involving periodic tables and stoichiometry. People-chemistry -- More specifically, the kind that brings opposite sexes together. The spark, the brief romantic period where guys and girls actually feel like they might work out for one another (before they really get to know each other and realize what they're going into). What is the obsession with the timing being just right? Why does romance have to surprise and charm and make you feel emotions and that flowery bullshit? Aren't we a little old to be getting butterflies in our stomachs?
Maybe I'm just bitter, but I feel like we wait around for that magical moment, and before you know it, you're getting blindsided by old age and options start running out. And that's when 30-year old Jane realizes she's going to have to settle for 35-year old John because he can provide a stable lifestyle, despite the fact that it's a B- relationship at best. Mammals in nature simply seek compatibility. I'm glad that as humans, we can advance beyond just finding mates for their hunting prowess and ability to reproduce (though that's all very important stuff too), but does it really have to come to "the right moment"?
I'm all about hitting it off with someone the right way, but I hoped we'd be mature enough by this age that we don't have to play stupid back and forth games. It's getting old, and so are we.Thoughts? Are we ever told old for butterflies?
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About the Author
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- From: ALB3AST@xanga
- About Me: absolute.
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Comments (38)
I've written about the science of chemistry like the chemistry of dating. You have to have the right elements to make the right reaction.
With the logic of settling when you're old that would also imply we should be choosier in our youth but those are all relative terms. What is young, what is old? Depending on our biological clocks?
Personally, I don't think getting butterflies is a matter of age as it is of meeting the right match.
i still get them :)
my boyfriend's perfect ^^
x
nope, what if there are different kinds of butterflies?
justsaying
I still get them and I've been married almost 8 months
neverrrr <3
I agree there's such a thing as being too old for butterflies. I feel too old for butterflies. It must be the illusion of "love" we're looking for, people are always expecting some amazing perfect love that we fantasize about but I guess as we grow older we realize it's not really like that and we settle for a more practical version of love...? I don't know.
Chemistry can be created, that's why I think it's all a bunch of nonsense. A womanizer can sweet talk his way into any woman's mind and make it seem like there's a connection when there's really not.
I've come to realize that you can have all the love, trust and communication in the world with someone but tollerence is more important than all of it.
Will I still be able to stand this person 40 years from now?
it's always great when you get the butterflies. i'm sure everyone feels the same. who doesn't want to share a moment like that with someone. i don't think you'll ever get tired of it and i don't think it goes away as you age. a lot of people settle.. but the few who wait are happily rewarded.
I fall in love twice a day, lol.
you can never be too old <3
Never too old for butterflies.
6 months in I still get them.
We're never too old for them.
never.
I hope we're never too old for them. I'm 31 and searching for my special guy. I hope for butterflies when I find him!
i hope not.
it's the butterfly moments that keep us going, not just in relationships, but in life. getting a job promotion, or the job you really want, having kids, falling in love, all butterfly feelings that we're never too old for.
listen... i'm in my low 20's, and i feel like i'm too old for butterflies. i was thinking about this just last week. i had this boyfriend in high school, and he made me feel so... *trying to find the words* like when he would just look at me, i would get the butterflies and i would feel like the most special girl in the world to have him.
we've been broken up (for a LONG time). i've had a boys here and there, but i don't think i'll feel the butterflies again. my hormones aren't all teenager-y and racing. i don't feel anything. i feel dead in that aspect.
all my friends are at the point where they're starting to get married. i don't feel like i'll ever get married, or fall in love again. i've lost hope.
no more butterflies for me.
@LoveMeDeux@xanga - you make a very valid point!!!
I've never had butterflies. Maybe, it's true, you got to wait for butterflies. Or just be independent in life and never marry if you can afford to. I think butterflies happen when you are in the right situation at the right time with the right person no matter what age.
you're never too old to feel butterflies in your stomach for someone but when you're older, the fishing pool gets smaller, if you find someone to be semi-potential, take that chance because it's only one chance and if you don't take it, it might not come again. love is all about taking risks.
I hate those damn butterflies. I get them whenever I talk/see or have the possibility of interacting with my ex. Needless to say I'm still in love with her, and she hates me...so maybe it's more a fear kind of butterfly thing. No one else has ever given me butterflies before or since her though.
yeah.. i'd say bitter is correct.
and maybe jaded.
and that's fine. you'll find it.
or you'll be the weirdo with all the cats.
either way-- you live how you want, and you make choices that make a difference in your life.
ps... you're never too old.
i waited 24 years to find my butterflies.
and i'll probably keep them forever.
no no no no. never.