Thursday, 22 October 2009
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Dating Transitions
This article made me reflect on the phases of dating:
I think I wrote a farcical parody on it in the past. Now that I'm older, I'll write a better rendition of the stages of dating.
Juvenile:
There are young women raised in more conservative settings that are taught to refrain from dating but most young woman imagine the romanticism in dating therefore they take a chance and date those they are comfortable or interested in. Everything in the relationship is idealized unless they are well-adjusted individuals who actually get to know the other individual in the process. This is a time for new experiences and experimentation.
Habitual:
This is where you start to get to know the other person. You may spend a lot of time with them or even move in with them and start to realize their bad habits and flaws. Woman start to realize they have to consider what they require in a relationship, thinking of how it fulfills their current needs and how their partner may fit into their future plans.
Mature:
It involves sacrifice. Going through trials and tribulations. It is supportive, compromising and fitting into someone's lifestyle.
I think speaking from experience I've only been through the first phase. I am now on the next phase. I regret that I was too preoccupied and missed out on certain subtleties and tender moments of dating. I will definitely cherish future moments if they are worthwhile.
What do you think of these phases of dating? Would you add any other phases?
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- From: Parsimony@xanga
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Comments (9)
i've gotten up to step 2, but never step 3 in dating. i realized that at this point in my life, i'm not ready to sacrifice all of me for someone yet. step 3 will be a challenge for me.
I am at the end of the second step I believe. I like this.
i am in the 3rd step and loving every minute of it. ♥
I feel that before my ex girlfriend and I broke up, she was going through the habitual stage. I was already in the mature stage, though there wasn't alot of compromising for me to do.
sounds about right...
I make small compromises, so really, I'd prefer to say that I'm transitioning. Because, really, we have hit very few trials, but I know I would be willing to sacrifice and compromise for him, & vice versa. So I'm likely between 2 & 3, respectively.
I think a common misconception of the third phsae for younger girls devoting themselves and sacrificing too much for a guy. Don't break your back, sacrifice going out with friends for a guy. There are times when ths is suitable. But there are times, even when you want to be with your guy, you need to have time for your girls for yourself.
Besides, the longer yooure away from him, the more you value the time spent with him =]
I've definitely been through Juvenile and I'm just coming out of Habitual. Which, ironically enough, landed me smackdab in the middle of Mature. I think I tried for a very long time to match my SO to my life...And now I'm realizing that I love him, no matter what, and that requires time and effort. Compromise is our new favorite word. :)
mature.
tho im sad too the romantic moments r gone x)