Wednesday, 14 October 2009
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Jumping In Head First
I have a few friends who are always hungry for love, attention, and relationships. They’ll do anything to find love, seek attention, and to be in a relationship all together. Honestly, I don’t know how they can do it, because I can’t see myself falling head first for a guy I just met. To my friends, getting into a relationship is so easy. At least for them they are. My friends are in and out of relationships all year round, and it just never seems to come to a complete stop. They’ll stay single for two days or maybe even three, but sure enough by day four they already found themselves a new love. It could be that they’re desperate to find love, or maybe they feel they need to be with someone to complete them. But honestly, you need anyone to make you happy, and sure enough you don’t need anyone to complete you. The only person that can make you happy is you, and the only person that can complete you is you.
When I talk to my friends, they seem more deaf than blind, and think I’m just this jealous lonely girl who just can’t get a guy to like her. Wrong, right, and right. I mean, I want a guy to imagine what I have so that way he could get a good vision of my body without me showing it to him. It’s nothing about sex, I just want him to see me as a whole person without the booty, the tits, the thighs…etc. You know?
Before my friends can even get to know a guy they’re already showing him their goods. Then when the guy gets their goods they’re leaning on me crying because they just got played, and swore they never saw it coming. But by day four all those tears are whipped away, and they’re back doing the same all over again.
So, how can someone do these things to themselves and not care? Then expect to have a long lasting relationship if they jump in head first.
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About the Author
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- From: LifeSux19
- Name: LifeSux19
- About Me: I'm 19 years old. And I live in NYC
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Comments (22)
i did this twice. they were not good ideas at all. i will always get to know someone before dating them.
Some people need to learn these lessons for themselves, unfortunately.
Some people just can't be alone so they jump head first in whatever present themselves on the way.
it's just as you said- they either want "love", attention, or they just don't want to be alone. I've only been in 2 other relationships before the man i have now, and we were best friends for 9 years before he asked me out, and now we're engaged. love & attention do happen. not all at once or right away, but try talking to your friends about it (being patient, that is)
eh, they'll grow out of it.. maybe.
On the other hand, if you want to take it slow and get to know someone or be friends first - a lot of guys will be off like a shot at that point too. You just never hear from them again because they say you are "not interested".
It seems to depend on who the guy is and how seriously he is interested. If he is just cruising he will move on no matter whether the girl "shows him her stuff" or not.
love is different for everyone but i don't think it's right for ppl to keep getting into a relationship
and getting out of one.. that is tough man. everyone has a different opinion on that topic though
it takes time and more chances...they'll learn to be careful eventually...
i rekn ur friends attitudes towards relationship sounds really wrong ><
Your blog post reminds me of my sister. She used to date a new guy every other day when she was in Junior High. She'd call me and tell me that she broke up with a boy, and then a few days later be dating a new kid.
I know what you mean about people who are always in relationships and every single one of their relationships is so "serious" and "important", but I think training themselves to bounce back so quickly puts them in a mindset that is going to keep them from every having a really "important" relationship. As for you, just don't think you can't fall for someone you just met. Keep all your options open :) You never know. You will feel something for a guy someday whether you just met him or have known him for awhille, and it will be the real thing, so just don't let your head yell louder than your heart and keep you from being truly happy!
i think everyone goes through a phase where they want to be in a relationship simply because they want someone to be there for them. but rushing into things never works.
I bet you'll find the right man, before your friends do. (=
Serial daters!
Go hard or go home. Thats my motto. I don't inch into a relationship and go the the motions of "ok.. at month 1-3 we have to do this, and by month 6 we then do that". That's bullshit. If you dig someone don't half ass it just to save yourself the heartbreak later. Go all in and if it crashes and burns then so be it. Being too cautious feels fake as shit.
Im not saying show the person yer digging your no-no spots all crazy like and shit. But don't walk around with layers and layers of walls up at all times either. Your chances of "finding the right man" are just as low and/or high as your serial dater friends. Just different styles of going about it.
@feelslikejuly@xanga - My sister does the same thing. I'm 19 and shes' more experienced than I am or will ever be.
@getta_ring_on_it - That is so true. I've fell for a guy I've never "met before". I use to see him every single day, and the more I saw him the more feelings I had for him. It was kind of creepy because I fell for him before I could even get a chance to talk to him. We only said a few words to each other and that was it. I wish it could've been more than that. I guess it was my loss.
haaha my bestfriends both of them are like that...and there girls and is pretty funny because as i was reading this there names came into my head and i was like...mhmmm they deserve it for acting so follishly
@erahslover@xanga - I have to agree with you on that one. You're not first to tell me this. I hear this every single day from family to friends and even strangers.
@LifeSux19 - all it really takes is getting your heart broken ONCE in order to hesitate on every relationship decision much less starting a new relationship period. ...but THEN again, all its takes is missing out on that ONE person you were crushing on really hard to be like "dammit... never again" ahaha. and I think thats where I am right now. Way too many opportunities lost by me playing it too safe.
But everyone has their favorite flavor of interacting with potential S/Os. Your friends are nutballs haha, but im sure once they find the ACTUAL "the one"(whatever that means) it'll work out somehow :D
i think it's a matter of maturity. some people grow up, and some people never want to face their fears. as terrible as it sounds, i get tired of friends who do this kind of thing to themselves. it's completely foolish.
You basically just definied attention whores. These people thrive on drama and attention--it's the air they breathe. You have to key them into it and tell them to either grow the heck up and stop playing around like little children, or break away from them.
Trust me, I've had several "friends" like this and we all tried to console them in their teary-eyed times, when they've gotten "played" or whatever, and they milk you and everyone else for all you have and then move on at turbo speed to find the next source of attention. A new love, new relationship, etc.
Excuse the bitterness, but I've had way too many experiences with people just using me to console them and give them the attention they want when it's convenient for them.