Sunday, 11 October 2009
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Help Me Play The Dating Game!
I just moved to a new place, and was extremely excited about a fresh start. I hadn't been the most social at my last school and I really wanted to be more outgoing. So I reached out towards people, and after 2 months of living in my current residence, I have a group of 5 friends.
Everything was fine and dandy until last night when i started getting feels towards all 3 boys in my group. They all have some similar characteristics, which might be why I'm attracted to all of them, yet they're so different in numerous ways.Boy 1:This boy was the first to reach out towards me personally. In my opinion, he's the best looking of the three guys (side note- I'm not a shallow person, I just thought I'd throw that thought out there.) He's very smart and artsy, which has never appealed to me before this. He makes me laugh, but also makes me feel intimidated. I feel like I have to think before I say anything, maybe I'm trying to impress him...Boy 2:The second boy is the easiest to talk to. He told me he likes me, and I think he's got the whole goofy-silly-friend thing going on. But I don't feel any physical attraction towards him. We get along great, and I know he really cares about me, but when I'm around him, I feel smothered with love. In a bad way.Boy 3:My third guy is the funniest out of the group. Everything he says makes me laugh, and he laughs at my jokes as well. Not only do we have the same sense of humor, but I'm physically attracted to him. I would drop everything to help him, which I actually did today when he asked me to come to his house to help him with homework. The flaw with him is, he sort of has a thing with another girl. They're not dating, so I don't feel like a homewrecker, and truthfully, I don't think they're good with each other.Who do you think I should choose? Have you ever been in a situation similar to mine?
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- From: anonymish
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Comments (22)
I like boy number two, haha. I think being smothered is an easy thing to fix -- just talk to him about it and tell him that what he's doing/saying/whatever is turning you off even though you do like him.
three or one
I'd vote for number three. As long as he's more into you than the other girl.
If not, him, then number 1. I wouldn't do number 2-- attraction is a necessity.
I'm not going to suggest one of them- but just look at the way you worded this. Surely this tells you what you really want? Asking others for advice may help, but realistically (I've been there before) it won't get you any closer to choosing. Unless you've already made up your mind and are looking to others for clarification. Try sitting down and talking to them, or alternatively sitting down and talking to yourself to work this out. Keep writing things similar to this though and things will become very confusing in your head. Writing is a great way to vent feelings and clear your head, but writing things where other opinions will come into action will add to the confusion and frustration. Try poetry or lyric writing.
I also realise that me saying this may add to the confusion too :P
Number three would be the best choice, imo.
I think that number three is a good choice. But if you could talk to number two and tell him that the smothering is too much for you, and he understands and fixes it, then he'd be an even better choice, imo.
seriously, if you really like them, you shouldn't even need help asking for help on a website.
even if you do, you should at least have a clearer image of who you like.
if you are just talking about crush and who you should develope deeper feelings for then I guess I could understand and I'll be less harsh LOL.
You should know who you point more towards to, I would say 3? just because obviously you are not so attracted to 2 and shallow won't get you anywhere.
Go for him faster than the other girl! see who he digs more... if not, go for 1 just because I like his artsy smartness.
Boy 3. It seems you connect with him the best :]
wait a minute.......in The Dating Game you aren't supposed to know what they look like and you ask them ridiculous questions like "if you and i were stuck in the amazon jungles with my grandparents and their 3 cats on our first date, what 3 items do you have in your backpack and what would our date be?"
i say ask them that question and choose they guy with the best answer.
You're not really asking for advice. You're more asking for words of encouragement or assurance that what you want to do is right.
Just by the way you worded it, you obviously want us to all say "go with boy 3!" and then in your mind, you can feel a little better about going with boy 3. Even if someone did make a convincing argument for you to choose boy 2 or whatever, you'd just brush it off and be like "well, you're just some chick on the internet who doesn't even know me" [which is extremely true].
I mean, you've already made up your mind. You don't need strangers on the internet to assure you that you're making the right choice.
Oh, and btw, I would personally choose boy 1 but only 'cause I'm into really smart people...
3
three~.
Hint: You're a girl, so you win the dating game, always.
m. i'd say 3 .. i guess. idk i've never been a "choose who" situation. was very clear that it was my bf that i liked right away when we became best friends.
Honestly, I have never been in your situation, but as an outsider, lets see if we can break this down:
Boy 1: Athough you're physically attracted to him, he intimidates you. You do like him in a way, but you always feel as though you need to be careful with what you say around him. This can be harmful because if you always try to impress someone, you would not feel comfortable in your own skin (If you can't be yourself around a guy, then there's a problem in the long run).
Boy 2: He cares about you too much and you're not physically attracted to him. This sounds like a sister/brother bonding to me. Sure he makes you laugh and feel smothered with love, but you're not responding to his love (I only see friendship here b/c I was in a similar situation before).
Boy 3: You're physcally and characteristically attracted to this guy. You share a sense of humor and you're willing to help him whenever he asks you. Sounds like you're more fond of this guy than the other two guys. (Now the only problem here is, he's fond of another girl).
Let's see, if I was in your shoes, I'd approach "boy 3" because you liked him enough to "drop everything and help him," then you have already developed a liking to him. You're not just in it for his looks, but his character attracts you too, but perhaps he didn't ever think of you in a romantic way because you didn't give him the chance to. To me, it looks like you're more fond of boy 3 than the others. Don't hesitate because you think he likes another girl, you might be wrong (I hesitated before with my current bf, but it turned out that he did started to like me and now we've been dating for almost 2 years). Good luck with your choice and you will never know the result until you try!!!
@Jack_Morrison@xanga - I agree with this.
Before you choose, are they interested in you?? It sounds so dumb that you're using Datingish as some sort of poll. Make up your own damn mind.
Besides there are plenty of other men out there other than those three. Look at China for crying out loud!
What happened? How did I get this old so fast? Life is like a roll of toilet paper; The smaller it gets, the faster it goes...Sure wish I could find a lady in her fortys or fiftys. Only extremely thin women excite me. It is not a fetish, I am extremely thin and tall...any ideas??
dont' do anything with 3 until he's all clear of his thing wit the girl!
1 sounds good..maybe you'll get over the intimidation :)
Sounds like you like 3 the best but he sounds like he is going to turn into a butt load of drama. 2 It sounds like you just like to be liked by him, but that is the extent of it...so I would go with one. He sounds awesome, and the fact that you are intimidated a little bit by him is a good thing, it means you are always going to feel like you got a real catch. you'll always be proud you got him. You know?
mhm i kinda like two and one,
You shouldn't be with someone who you're not comfortable with...hence if he intimidates you....
Guy 2 and 3 sounds good!