Tuesday, 29 September 2009
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The Five Stages of Dating
One term I really hate is "It's complicated." I mean either you're seeing someone or you're not. Right? Maybe it would be easier if we all classified our relationships based off of the 5 stages of dating. Like if Facebook had an option to say "Charles is in a stage 2 relationship with Kelsey." In case you are unaware of what the 5 stages of dating consist of, let me give you a brief description of each...
Stage 1:Meeting
This is the bittersweet part of dating where you meet someone and you know you're insanely attracted to them but are unsure of how they feel or what will end up happening between the two of you. The "crush" stage is only really a stage of dating if it leads to stage 2...
Stage 2: Dating
Personally, this is my favorite stage of dating. Perhaps that is because I am afraid of commitment and rarely have gotten past this stage. It is where you are going out on dates with the person and there is a known mutual attraction. It's the "butterfly in the stomach" stage where everything in the world seems perfect. There may or may not be physical intimacy in stage 2.
Stage 3: Commitment
This stage occurs when a couple decides to be exclusive and most often monogamous. With many couples this is where physical intimacy starts. The passion and excitement of stage 2 is still there but now there are barriers that you don't have to face as a single person. This is the "official" stage where you want the world to know of the special relationship between you and your SO.
Stage 4: Relaxation
This is where we begin to feel comfortable enough with our partner to let down our walls of uncertainty and really be ourselves. With this stage comes disagreements when we realize our partner is not the ideal that we once imagined them to be. This is the "make it or break it stage" where we have to decide if this is someone we want to be with long term or not.
Stage 5: Engagement
Okay, stage 5 doesn't always have to begin with a proposal, but it usually starts when we decide that the person we are with is who we want to ultimately spend the rest of our life with. This is the "love" stage when you have realized that you really have found the one.
Do you agree with the five stages of dating? Which stage is your favorite and why?
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- From: meowmeow
- Name: meowmeow
- About Me: 20 yr old college student.
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Comments (52)
"One term I really hate is "It's complicated." I mean either you're seeing someone or you're not."
100% Agree!!
&the rest of this entry scares me. "commitment" *shudders*
i like these stages.
Interesting. Not sure whether I disagree or agree. I think I'd have to compare these stages to another set of stages or something in order to decide that.
Within these stages, I like 4 & 5 best :]
But sometimes it really is complicated!
I think that you need to see from a different perspective; sometimes in a relationship it really is complicated. Sometimes people just do that for attention, but not all the time - there is actual complicated relationships.
dating stage is always the best. but honestly nothing is ever this clear cut.
crushes=awesome, commitments=suck
how about the last stage, cheating or divorce! lol
I like 3,4&5 the most =)
@XoAsianBabioX@xanga - right on. i agree with you.
My gf and myself are getting through the end of stage 4, and i'm glad to say we're gonna make it.
As for my favorite stage? I don't have one, I like the whole process, whether it be heartbreaking or not. It's something to learn from either way.
Before
1st, 2nd, 3rd and home.
Now
5 stages
Things are getting more complicated ><
Nice stages.
I disagree. A relationship can very well be complicated. People can having feelings for each other but be held back from being exclusive by certain factors (exes? Distance). Some people see it as still being in some kind of relationship so they remain "kind of exclusive" without... ARGH NEVER MIND. THAT'S EXACTLY WHY IT'S COMPLICATED. You get my point.
@Starring_Hobo89@xanga - Haha, that is so true! Soon there'll be a checklist of 25 things to do in order to be a good SO.
lol. i'll get back to you on that if i actually do go through all 5 stages. i feel im at stage 3-5 atm.
you posted this not knowing for yourself whether or not this is true. so i'm a little iffy about this post. no offense. =3I love them all! (=
Good stages, I think.
My favorite is probably the one I'm in: Engagement.
Once you've experienced the "highers",
it's hard to go back
to any one before.
I like stage one :D. Actually, I like them all.
I like #4. I hate #2.
The fact that you've not gone past stage 2...not sure you know enough to write down these 5 stages of dating. Fighting with your partner does not stop once you realize your partner and you belong in stage 5. It's an ongoing battle.
the thing is, sometimes you're on the borderline of friends/dating. i've been there, i know what its like. i mean, you could be dating, but taking a break, and it might end. thats what ya call complicated. it's much more than "you're either dating or you're not"
i have read about these stages before, it's not all something i made up, i just worded them my own way. they don't classify every relationship but i still think its a fun way to look at relationships in general.:) @GaMeGurLsH@xanga
sorry i know i did the reply thing backwards.. but its not letting me copy and paste and i dont feel like rewriting all of that lol
I think I like this, I feel like my boyfriend ( of nearly 2 years) are inbetween steps 4 and 5. Most definitely closer to 4 rather than 5 because we've talked about getting married and how we hope that it turns out that we can spend the rest of our lives together, etc. Yes-I love him, and I know he's not the person I thought I was when we initially met. I'm sure he could say the same for me. I like this definition of the stages, but-why define them?
Interesting.
Thanks for the post!
but dating IS complicated :U
I believe you're descriptions of these steps are based on what's typical. There are recommended steps that work for people who have discipline to follow them. They avoid the rush into intimacy. The worst pain is associated with the thought "Oh well, guess it'll take a little longer." There is no risk of unwanted stds or pregnancy; no contraception needed. In the end, you are guaranteed not to make a mistake, because you took all the steps. You develop a friendship with romance in mind; but intimacy never happens because you want to find your soulmate. There's guaranteed to be someone for you nearby. You just have to be uninvolved until you find that person. There probably are more than 1 person per 100 who fit you. But the most important thing to keep in mind is no sex until tied together. The ultimate test that will drop everyone unworthy; but nobody who's worthy of absolute love.
That does not mean people who don't wait are unworthy. But people who are worthy can and will wait if tested, no exceptions.
this is bullshiz -_____-