Do girls live off of drama? Do they create situations where drama will ensue just so they have something to complain about or talk about with their girl friends?
In my recent post
"Do Nice Guys Really Finish Last?" someone made a comment to what I wrote about finding "a girl who is emotionally stable to be drama free and out of the limelight."
INDI_PAK_diplomat@xanga wrote: "lol...and paris hilton is still a virgin...there might be two girls in the world that fit that description..."
I must admit I do have friends who bask in the glow that is drama. They will complain about the guy their dating. Trash talk about girls who's either too slutty, too crazy or too boring. They will date a guy knowing he's a player, date a cheater knowing he's a cheater and date a loser knowing he's a loser. She's even text her boyfriend she was mad at him one time for no reason at all. My question is why? She's smart and successful. She's pretty and she gets hit on by guys. Even when she's dating a nice guy, she'll still have something to complain about.
I wonder if she just likes the drama or is she really sabotaging her relationships?
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Comments (25)
Sometimes drama is what's "known"... and we're always searching for stability. To be stable, even if it means being dysfunctional... is what most people strive for. So ... of course there are drama lovers, because that's all they understand!
I used to think I really didn't like drama. Because the truth is, I don't. But that doesn't mean that I am not unconsciously creating it so that I have something to analyze and think about in my relationships. Because I have noticed lately that I certainly am. Girls are relationship-oriented beings, so when all is right with the world we need something to focus on and sometimes we create situations in our heads (by "suddenly" noticing something that has changed from how it used to be) or we create them in our reality (by starting an unnecessary fight), because then we want something to focus on, worry about, and to try to fix.
Just like guys are goal-oriented and always seem to be "dreaming and scheming" to come up with the newest lame idea, "dude, we are totally making the most BA water balloon launcher", "dude I am getting a projection TV it only cost 75 dollars on Ebay" if you will notice the only time guys seem really into their relationships is in the beginning when that angelic, or hot, or untouchable girl is their goal. Which is why girls are always being told to maintain the mystery, so that we can stay one of their goals.
It is human nature. Imperfect in the extreme, but it plays out beautifully most of the time.
No female is emotionless and drama free. I think guys are looking for guys. I don't like drama and I hate that emotions sometimes rule me, but I'm not a drama queen who thrives on that stuff.
OMFG, yes! I know girls like this.
There was this one girl who calls me a huge slut even though at the time, I had only been with 3 people and she had hooked up with well past 20 people at that point.
She only called me that just because I hooked up with her ex so soon just after meeting him, but she's really one to talk because her own numbers speak louder.
She calls the girl her ex is with now hideous.
I'm not flattering myself, but many people have said I'm quite attractive...and she calls an attractive girl like me a slut.
It's getting old. Their relationship burned out long before I ever came into the picture.
My ex is with someone now and I don't care to start any drama with that girl because I know I can do better. Hence, why he is my ex.
I hate drama. I always have. It stems from my fear of confrontation to some degree, I'm sure, but mostly it's just draining. Live and let live. Try to get along with people. And if you can't, avoid them. Creating drama just makes you look immature and insecure.
That said, I think many girls, including myself, are occasionally ruled by their emotions. That's different from creating drama just for the sake of drama. I'm glad that I'm out of high school and college and don't have to deal with that as much anymore.
Guys have and create drama too. But us girls tend to drag it out.
I sabotogue my relationships if it seems as if its about to turn bad. Its like yanking out a tooth... that and I'd rather my girl break up with ME than have to do the breaking up myself. I can deal with break up fine.. but something messes me up thinking about if the girl i just dumped is ok. This doesnt come from a place of conceit, but if im dumped its just easier for both of us... even if I did something retarded to force your hand in the first place.
Not a fan of drama... but it seems some girls rate how much they like a guy by how much drama they give her. "God im so pissed off!! but if i wasnt pissed it'd mean i didnt like him" Crazy-talk.
I hate drama. It's too emotionally taxing to be of any worth. When drama does occur (as it always will eventually), I try to look at the situation rationally, address it appropriately, and try not let it get out of hand.
I hate drama. I really do except I will admit I am considered a drama queen. In my last relationship before my wife, my ex-girlfriend was always starting things either out of parania or she just liked t hear herself speak. It basically destroyed our relationship.
Though I am considered a drama queen, I do think that there are some girls out there who are stable enough, meaning girls that know they don't need drama ruling their lives but gets it every now and then, and also don't want to be in the limelight. I think that there are girls out there like that. They're not emotionless, but just stable enough in their own skin. It's called self-control. In other words, these people that just sabotage relationship don't get very far in terms of trust with people. That is my honest opinion
@erahslover@xanga - I've done the same thing before. Not proud of it but I have and sometimes it's been because of drama that I hear from other people and sometimes from the person I was with myself talking about me when she or he didn't know I was there. I agree with the crazy-talk too.
girls love drama..... especially korean girls! damn those korean tv dramas!!!
All I hope is that eventually they get tired of all the drama and realize it's not worth the effort. :)
shes just bored.lol
I hate drama. But I think everyone has drama in them somewhere.
Maybe some just like the thrill of it because it keeps them "entertain" in whatever aspect they are missing in their relationship.
If you start enough shit and make your boyfriend think there's problems, then apparently that's a sure-fire way to get him to pay attention to you.
Unfortunately that only works for awhile. Then we get wise to what you're doing, realize all the "problems" are probably figments of your imagination, and stop paying attention to what you say.
I'm perceptive enough to recognize when problems are actually problems and not simply drama. When it comes to drama for drama's sake, I just ignore the individual who's causing problems.
maybe people are just dramatic. or maybe things just happens.
Women who love drama do so because they lack the personality to lead an interesting life otherwise. It's much easier to needlessly complicate the medicore than to strive for greatness.
Apparently, "these girls" may be lacking something in their lives. That is my personal observation and from my personal knowledge.
Having prevalent insecurities about themselves, physically, intellectually, and emotionally, or in whatever aspect of their life. Possibly lack of attention, maybe even insufficient or no parental love and care. The causes are many and various.
Depending on how deeply affected they are of their privations, they would possibly resort to whatever and whichever way would gain someone's, anyone's, or everyone's attention.
Attention from others, enemies and/or friends, can take on as a form of being "cared" for.
This includes stirring up unnecessary drama.
It's called "insecurity" and that is an issue of people, not gender specific.
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The girls who started their posts with "I hate drama" are usually the ones who have to most drama. And while I'm impartial to drama, I've come to accept the fact that I have a bajingo and therefore am ruled my emotions and that usually lead to unnecessary drama. thats just life.
she just likes the drama.
She likes drama.
That's why I hang out with guys. They are so easy to get along with and I don't have to worry about hurting their feelings or worry about making jokes that might offend them.