As mentioned in my previous entry
, I am predicting a cascading crisis with my parents in the near future on the issue of my dreaded single-dom. This past weekend while visiting my parental units, my father "casually" (read - 'not so') dropped the word "girlfriend" in conversation about eight times -- up from four about a month ago. This constitutes a 100% increase in nagging in a one-month period. Extrapolating this trend outward, I anticipate that I will get approximately 16 nags next month, 64 nags in three months and 256 nags in 6 months. After 6 months, pretty much every word coming out of my dad's mouth will be girlfriend
! Girlfriend! Girlfriend
! Girlfriend! Girlfriend! Girlfriend! Girlfriend!
Utterly petrified by these implications, I have since been on a dating binge
to find a girl who measures up (and one pretty
enough for my dad) to my parents' exacting standards. Mostly, I've simply decided to grow myself a spine and asked eligible young debutantes out for food, coffee, or an awkward 2 hours sitting adjacent to each other in a movie theater. In all, I am proud to say that I have been on dates with 6 different girls in the past month (with a few follow-ups too!) Amazingly, I have yet to be slapped, stabbed, maced, or groped (SIGH!
) in any of my outings.
What I have learned from all this is that dating is hard work!
Not to mention expensive. In addition to the regular dinner/coffee/movie routine, some of the more eccentric dating adventures I have tried include OkCupid.com
(See entries #1
). Several weekends ago, I even dared to venture into the precarious an irrefutably hilarious world of speed dating
! The only experience I've had with speed dating was on the big screen, namely movies like Hitch
and 40 Year Old Virgin
, in which singles busily mingle over little square dessert tables adorned with small candles. So when the opportunity arose, I thought, "Why not?"
My experience, however, was definitely NOT
like Hitch or 40 Year Old Virgin... Firstly it was at a bar, not scenic restaurant or posh-y lounge. Imagine a loud, boisterous, sports bar with drunken Irishmen fighting over football and you, along with other hopeful singles, trying to find the love of your life. As soon as I walked in, I knew I had potentially made a mistake. The room was filled with mid-to-late 30's and early 40-year old geeky men who had the look of desperation as if this was their last shot at meeting a real woman. The "girls" (read-women
) were equally vintage
and had similar looks of desperation (and possibly menopausal).
It was not until approximately an hour into the "pre-social mixer" that actual girls
who didn't look like they needed the services of a fertility doctor arrived. Soon thereafter, the speed dating was underway! Unfortunately, the set-up wasn't what I was expecting from my film research. Firstly, there were no aforementioned square tables...or seats for that matter--at least not for the men. Instead, what resulted was the ladies sitting against the wall on bar stools while a train
of men--what I affectionately called the "meat-train
" cycled passed from one station
to the next. You would introduce yourself and answer a plethora of obligatory questions such as "name, location, college, job, duration in DC, etc," and just as you are getting into some meaty conversation, a lady would ring the "nazi bell
" and you would have to cycle to the next station and start all over again. By the third girl, my throat and mouth was so parched I was literally rasping for a drink of water! When you feel like you liked a person and wanted to meet her/him again, you write their assigned number on a card. The girls do the same and afterward, the facilitators will look for "matches" on your respective cards and email you the contact info of your matches.
Overall, I did meet some nice and interesting people. I even started a "bromance" with a cool dude named "Andrew" who is a chef and is opening his own restaurant. (You could always use a bro to cover your back in Left 4 Dead
or Call of Duty
!) However, there were a couple of unique
individuals on both sides of the meat train. Certainly unique people go to speed dating events.
Have you been to a speed dating event? Had luck finding someone?