I'm pretty angry right now, and I have been for the past week, a couple days ago my friends and I went out to eat and catch up basically. So while we were sitting down and chatting, one of my girl friends' asked all our guy friends' one question,
"Hey guys', do you ever think it's alright for a guy to demean a women for being in a successful job and making more money then a man?"
The reason why she asked this is because my girl friend here, recently got promoted in her job to a higher management position which she's been working so hard to get to for the past year. Now when she got the promotion she was so happy and jumping off the walls because she got the job, but when she went home that night and told her man about how she got a raise and promoted, all hell broke loose. Apparently he told her to
quit her job and find something not so "time consuming", so she asked him, "what exactly do you want me to do that isn't so time consuming?" And the douche basically told her this:
"Well in all honesty, I don't like the fact that you are getting paid more then me, and also the fact is you won't be here to cook and clean like before if you take this job. I would rather you turn the position down and stay with your regular pay and work. I should be the only one making the big dollars coming in, and for you to make more then me, is just not possible and it makes me look bad."I'm completely pissed off at her SO, but it was even more of a piss off to hear what our guy friends had to say, they practically agreed with my friend's SO!!! Not only that, our guy friends' told us how we women should let men defend us when it comes to a fight whether it be physical or ve rbal, okay no offense to them, I understand they might have meant to say it with good intentions but it didn't come out that way. What's even more, is that they said women shouldn't try to play a "man's sport" like basketball, soccer, football, baseball etc.... Our night of supposed to be catching up and fun ended badly because of this, I know we all have different opinions and ideals but that was just way too far for me.
So this is what I've got to say, I'm a woman working hard to get her degree, I love kickboxing and football, and I can seriously do bad all by myself.
I know a guy could take care of me,
but I refuse , I'm not looking for Mr. Knight and Shining Armor, because I can rescue myself from terror and tragedy coming my way. It's not okay to say women need to take the backseat and let the men drive because the men need to have a higher paying job, and they need the woman to rub their feet and take care of everything else for them. Please! We are so past that stage of men being more better then women, and blah blah blah! I'm pretty steamed about the whole thing, and what's worse, my friend's SO texted me saying, "Well you can't win them all Angel, and this is how the world goes."
I refuse to believe that this is how the world goes with men and women, what happened to equality?! What do you think (men and women)?
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Comments (88)
I think men are totally above womem.
@Dare2BDiferentt@xanga - Yeah, women are above womem, too.
As a guy, I will say this: That husband + the guy friends = fucktards. On one hand, I can partially understand their feelings, because we (men) are often jibed and brought up being taught that rich men are attractive, and there is some insecurity that typically, women want men who make more money than them. He's probably afraid that once you start being richer than them, you will in turn lose attraction for him and compare him with other wealthier men - and it's a totally understandable fear. It's a commonly spread notion/myth through society.
Still, to say that you belong in the kitchen and doing housework the way he did, is... .... yeah.
male chauvinism at its best. Personally I don't mind letting the guy be the breadwinner. I would prefer to stay home. But I would do what I needed to do to help my family. I won't put up with a guy who thinks like your friend's S.O.(B).
i don't understand why it's such a big deal that a woman makes more money than her man... oh right, it's because most men are insecure... i think i'm going to get myself a sugar mama.
i can understand your friend's SO feeling "bad" persay that his woman is making more than him. But he the way he said it was sooooooooo douchey and old school. Women are not just living each day to cook and clean for their husbands while they big strong men bring home the bacon. FUCK THAT. it's almost 2010 for christ's sake, and it scares me that some men are still that closed minded-actually, men and women, because i know some women feel like they MUST just be the stay at home mom, cooking and cleaning all day. If some women WANT to do that, that's wonderful. As it would be if they worked a different full time job, other than being a mother/wife. But like you said-we as women can take care of ourselves, and I feel bad for your friend because she should be so proud of herself for this raise/promotion but is probably feeling doubt and guilt because of her pig of a boyfriend. lame.
he should have just been happy for her. any SO who does less than that isn't being a good SO. -_-
To be completely honest with you, yeah, I can do bad. I don't look very convincing at first, and no one takes me very seriously for a few minutes, but I can do it.
However, I've got one large, mean-looking daddy, I've got two tall brothers, I've got a half dozen big, semi-threatening-looking guy friends, and they all want to take care of me. I think being a woman is about recognizing that while you can kick butt and take names, you're willing to let guys champion you. They get to feel manly, while I get to feel feminine and taken care of. They'll let me in a verbal fight. They know that I can murder anyone verbally. But physically, no...not unless I ask them to.
But your friend's SO, and your guy friends, were way out of line.
And about men being better than women? lol, we're letting them take care of us. It's got a lot to do with your viewpoint. An example being: I was trying to do something, I don't remember what, and I was succeeding, but I don't have the weight to put behind it to do it "correctly". My brother was watching and took over, telling me that I wasn't doing it right. Then he made a crack about how "and they say women rule the world". I laughed. "You're doing that aren't you?" Shut him up, quick. :)
what. the. FUCK. he's an insecure sexist pig.
If a girl is making more money than her male SO, he should be damn proud that she can do well and survive on her own, not bring her down. So out of line.
maybe those guys just can't get laid or just have small dicks. so that's why they're saying that. i mean, beneath the douche-ness the SO is saying "I WON'T HAVE ENOUGH TIME TO FUCK YOU AND DO KINKY THINGS WITH YOU BABY!!!" :PÂ
i know a couple who are in their late 20's and the guy is going to seminary (it's like a school for training for pastors) so he's not going to make much money at all, and his girlfriend is an optometrist while her boyfriend is still in school (they're the same age though, i guess seminary just takes a lot longer to finish) and she's totally going to make more than her eventual husband. you know what? the guy loves his job and he's happy for her. i think that's really great.
also, my two friends are dating. the guy's going to be an artist whereas the girl's going to be a doctor or some sort. they're still together and they accept it, and even make fun of it! the guy's passion is art, he was going to be a pre-med guy but he changed his mind. i think that's awesome too :D
Assholes
He's an ass. Men should be freaking proud if their girlfriend has been promoted and is making more money than before. Some men are just real jerks.
that's absolutely ridiculous. her SO should've been nothing but supportive. personally, i think both and man and woman (or both woman or both men..whatever is your pleasure) should both contribute to the household in some way, but if one is making more than the other (regardless of gender), it SHOULD NOT matter. if anything, it's a good thing for both of them because that means they get to either save more, spend more, not worry so much about finances, whatever. that's totally dumb that all those men agreed & they all think that in some way, men are above women. you're right, those days are WAY past us. women are now way independent, mature, intelligent, etc.. some even more so than some men.
But you know what? We as women can be as mad as we want about what those men think, but it really won't solve anything. They will get theirs in some way or another & when they do, we all know they'll deserve it :)
lmaoooo wtf.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My best friend and i are dealing with pigs like that recently in our woodshop class! The teacher frequently makes jokes about women belonging in the kitchen and stuff like that and the guys in the class are just as bad. Out of about 16 - 20 students in the class only 4 are female. It doesn't help that one girl pretty much does no work and the other is the steriotypical blond bimbo who's very attractive but a complete idiot. We on the other hand are the strong independent women type and it pisses us off so much. Im not like a hard core feminist or anything but this class made us come to the conclusion that (much like that jon Lajoie song) some men are only good for 4 things 1. Killing spiders 2. Lawn work 3. Their penis' and 4. their brothers penis'
@OCDrules@xanga - haha their brother's penis haha i like that.
the poor guy has no self esteem
wow. i woulda been so pissed if my SO would ever say that to me.
that guy is an insecure douche bag. don't worry there are guys out there that aren't douche bags. if he was truly comfortable with who he was and really loved her for who she was he wouldn't care how much money she was making
what the fuck. hell yes i can 'do bad all by myself' too. taekwondo, muay thai, boxing girl here - i like beating up boys and watching them cry, being better at them and watching their mouths drop rocks my socks. and i most likely will be making more money than my husband. with that said, your friend's SO is a whiny, insecure, incompetent little SOB.
oooh male chauvinism gets me so angry.. WHOOsa. *smiles*
My boyfriend actually would LOVE it if I earn more than him.
jealous!
the world is revolving; it's not the same as it was centuries ago... nowadays, women have equal rights, equal statuses, equal opportunities, and equal so on and so forth... some or probably most men might find this difficult to choke, however, men need to swallow the truth whether it's like or not... especially since gender discrimination laws are presently available to help protect women (at school, at work, in life)... some men might feel that women are receiving better treatments than men... but whether that's true or not, i suggest that we should all learn to respect equality... even if we truly think or feel that we are far more superior...
but personally, i don't think it's that big of a deal... well, as long as women don't brag how they're better or use that in their arguments...
Ah, the combination of insecure heteronormative machismo and the "money = human worth" ideas that form the experience of being a modern American male. So disgusting and sad.
Well, that's just the way some people are.