Tuesday, 15 September 2009
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Friends With Benefits
I don't know how most people feel about friends with benefits, but I think it is completely wrong. I mean, the real pure reason for dating is to find the person you are going to marry, right?
Also, if you have any religious beliefs, like I do, it actually goes against God's reason for being together. If you want to be with someone, in the right and correct and pure way...should you not actually be with them. Also, if you want a pure relationship how is friends with benefits a pure relationship? The entirety of being a friend with benefits is lust. That is all that is behind a relationship like that.
How do you feel about friends with benefits?
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- From: i_deal_in_absolutes@xanga
- Name: Zac
- About Me: I've realized that more and more people these days are just living the way that they think that christians are supposed to live...But, why don't we stop doing that...and just ask God how he would like us to be living, and where he would like us to go...then, and only then, will we really be doing what we are supposed to...
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Comments (160)
Not something that I would participate in.
I don't see much wrong with it. But no one can stay unattached for long. A lot of FWB become relationships or total disasters.
This would go along with one night stands I assume
agreed
It's not something that I would participate in, that's for sure. But people do this kind of thing for that... need? Or something. I have a few friends like that and I often wonder if it's good or bad for them.
I guess it really depends on the person who is the friend with benefits.
No way would I have participated in this, even when I was in the dating scene...etc. I have kissed a friend, but I don't know if that's a friends with benefits situation, for real. I think it just sets you up for heartbreak, because most of the time, one person becomes more attached than the other. It just can't end well, and ends a good friendship more times than not.
And I find it morally wrong.
I never want to be in one :-| Its asking for trouble, and like "GiantUnicorn@xanga" said no one can stay unnattached for long.
Erm... not everyone wants a 'pure' relationship, and not everyone thinks that a relationship based on lust is wrong.
I know I wouldn't be able to handle it.
To each his own. Not right or wrong.
I vote yes, absolutely!
I have a few friends I sleep with and it works out great, but they are very mature and experienced and not easily attachable. The key is that you have to define the parameters up front in the open that way if someone get's stupid you can always go back and say "look this is what we agreed upon".
But that never happens because I have excellent intuition and I don't sleep with the ones who I know will fall in love.
i agree with you. it is completely wrong. there shouldn't even be a need for friends with benefits when the whole reason of dating is so that you get to know the person better and because you are sure that you want to marry them. this as i see it is even worse than cheating! it absolutely disgusts me. and you don't have to be religious to know it's wrong. people have got to respect themselves a lot more. to have moral values. can't just give up yourself on someone who you aren't sure you're gonna marry!! idk but people who do that are totally insane!! i mean seriously this is only going to mess up their lives. it has been said that people [mainly females] get depressed after having done it with someone before marriage. hence, friends w/ benefits is a waste of time it's stupid! and in my way of reason unacceptable.
this should just be in your blog so you dont get flamed the hell out on datingish
but like i've said... Friends With Benefits only works when the guy is a fuckin douche like Cormac McLaggen. SUPER HOT GUY. SUPER HOT HERMIONE. but he's a jerk. no thanks. maybe just one night and as long as he keeps quiet.
@ChevalierSeingal - sometimes you don't chose the people you fall in love with. sometimes you fall in love with the least expected person to do so with. even if you think you won't things are you might just fall in love with them. I've seen many cases like that firsthand.
@snapeful@xanga - what are the chances of a guy actually keeping quiet?
Its obviously not for everyone, especially annoyingly preachy christians. FYI not everyone believes in god.
@ChevalierSeingal - you say that the friends you sleep with are "mature, experienced and not easily attachable"; i find that said in and of itself, though. if you have too much sex, is it even for bonding anymore, or just for sexual gratification?
i slept with my ex after we broke up one time...
too emotional.
and i dont think i could do it again. with anyone. it didnt feel right.
@cdedodgethis@xanga - Absolutely I agree with you 100% sister. These dogmatists couldn't see out of there own box if they wanted too. I feel sorry for them. They are sexually frustrated! lol
i don't have a problem with it, i've done my share of friends with benefits and it worked for a while but after a while, you start to feel and want things that weren't there before. i guess if you're going to participate it in, you must know yourself very well and know where to draw the line.
@KittyCakesJ@lovelyish - Kitty you are very young and inexperienced. Young people fall in love quicker then eating a bowl of ice cream. lol So your decision is good for you, but you decision and opinion is just your opinion and decision.
@JennyGee@xanga - It can be either depending on the person. For example, I have one friend who I love and they love me. But we both absolutely agree that if we spent too much time together we would have a murder case on our hands. lol
We get along extremely well after being apart for a few weeks. It is like a honeymoon whenever we get together. But after a certain amount of time we get on each others nerves big time.
Sometimes a relationship starts normally, the whole dating thing. But later you realize that the amazing sex is all there is. As long as everyone is agreed, and no one hurts its all good.
as though there's not enough drama in life as it is...no thanks
I personally wouldn't take part in friends with benefits, but to each his own.
It's not only about lust.
Some people hate relationships. With a passion. Or they are too busy with their personal life to juggle a meaningful relationship. Sometimes fwbs are just easier than normal relationships. You get what you want/need and you don't have to worry about them afterwards. No going off into the night looking for some random person in a club.