Friday, 11 September 2009

• FML Friday!

  Fmylife.com contains short day-to-day life anecdotes. A simple recipe: in one sentence, each site visitor can tell the shitty moment which ruined his day. These short stories must begin with "Today" and end with "FML".

  Here are our favorite five submissions from F*** My Life this week:

  "Today, I hired a private investigator to find out if my wife of 15 years is cheating on me with my brother. I don't know what's worse, that she is cheating on me, or that instead of cheating with my brother she's cheating with my brother's wife. FML"

  "Today, my girlfriend of over a year broke up with me. Two weeks ago she complained that I didn't act like I really loved her. I then became more involved and caring just for her to show my love. The reason she broke up with me? Because I was "suffocating her with clinginess." FML"

  "Today, I was sitting with my boyfriend watching the Super Nanny. He watches the show regularly and said he has learned some of her techniques. Apparently, he uses them on me when I'm acting irrational. FML"

  "Today, I took a look at my boyfriend's video camera. On it were several videos of me on the toilet. My boyfriend has been hiding the videocamera in the bathroom air vent, and taping me taking dumps for the past three months. FML"

  "Today, trying to be sexy I was sucking on my boyfriends fingers. I was really starting to turn him on, when I noticed something crunchy in my mouth. Turns out, he went digging for treasure up his nose earlier. I found the treasure in my mouth. FML"

  Let's review what we've learned this week: Reserve #2 for your own bathroom. And if you're SO is making you sit in the corner when you whine or won't eat your veggies, you've been Super Nannied. Happy Friday!
  

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