Tuesday, 08 September 2009
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So Lonely Without My SO
Whenever I go to outings with my friends or to public places without my boyfriend, I feel so out of place. Before, I told myself that I wouldn't mind lasting a week without him, but who am I kidding... I NEED him by my side.
Why? I don't know. There's something about him that makes me feel complete. And I hate trying to figure out how to answer, "Where's your boyfriend?" 'Cause in the end, I say something dumb like "I didn't want him to come" or "He jumped off a bridge." Grr.. why do I live in a world of denial? Why can't I just let him know that I miss him dearly and want him to be with me?
I guess I'm not completely honest with him because I know there will be times when I actually do not need him to come and he may just use that against me. "But, but but... you said you NEEDED me to come to every event. Quit lying." Grr.. I know eh? I over-analyze things.
Like for instance, today I was walking in the mall after work and noticed that there were a lot of cute couples walking around as well. One section of my brain was like, "Ugh, look at them. They look so needy." While the other part of my brain told me differently, *panic mode* "Where's my hubby?! I want to hold his hands and also hold him into my arms!!" Yeah, I definitely need to see a psychiatrist about my irregular schizo mode.
What's your catch on this topic? Do you guys feel out of place whenever you go somewhere without your SO?
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About the Author
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- From: awkward_me
- About Me: This is my secret Xanga, which includes many posts of my love life - good and bad. I'm here to vent, pour my heart out, share some stories and get some advice. I'm just a regular teenager, wanting to get through life without falling too deep.
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Comments (42)
Hahaha. Oh dear, someone's lovestruck!
I don't have an SO so I wouldn't know anymore =( .
Buuuut way back when, I survived three months fine (almost). Hahaha.
erm .. a week? idk ... i mean, mine lives an hour away and we normally only get to see each other maybe once or twice a week. when i was at school, we were able to be apart for about 3 months. i mean its a LITTLE hard, but i certainly didnt feel the need to explain myself to anyone, or a NEED to have him by my side every second.. and we love each other much, so its nothing like that.
how old are you?
i feel this sometimes...but when i miss my bf, i call him and tell him i miss him. i dont like keeping it to myself.
when its to a place that has a lot of couples (fancy restaurants, theme parks, movies)
sometimes when I go to bed, I stay up a bit longer thinking that my SO should be sleeping next to me...
you're too dependent on him. i don't say this to negatively criticize you, but i think you really need to consider the fact that you're not growing independently as your own person.
to answer your question: i frequently go to restaurants (or other locations) where i see couples all the time, and in general, they make me sick. i dread the day i lose my judgment and decide i want a serious girlfriend.
Uhm...I only get to see my boyfriend every 4--7 months because we live in different countries, and although we miss each other, we can LIVE without being next to each other 24/7. You sound kind of obsessive no offense...if you did EVERYTHING and went EVERYWHERE together, what would you have to talk about at the end of the day?
no
you should spend more time with your friends. after my boyfriend and i broke up last year, i didn't want to go anywhere without him and such. eventually, i was able to have friends that i could hang out with and go somewhere on short notice, and you just learn hey -- my friends are awesome, and i don't need to think about him all the time. you could even pretend a faux relationship with one of your girlfriends just for fun (provided they only have platonic feelings towards you too and don't feel uncomfortable with the joke!) so you don't feel as lonely. hope that helps.
I think it's natural to miss someone that you love whenever they're not there. Just tell yourself that you don't need him there. It would just be nice to share that moment with him
@Ampersands_Anonymous@xanga - I definitely agree.
@ChOcOChObO@xanga - Aw..
-hugs- It's okay. You can handle it cause you are awesome. Not as awesome as yours truly, but still awesome.
I've been having problems too. My partner's been away for a while. I'm more and more lonely but I don't want to do anything except wait for her to come back. being with someone else is a completely foreign idea to me.
I do my thing and he does his. At the end of the day, we come home to the same place, sleep on the same bed and wake up to the same face =)
i think i have a pretty healthy balance
i always want him around with me and imagine how much more fun it would be with him there, but i dont mind not being with him on occasion ^^
x
oh yes. And my SO lives 4,000 miles away from me, so I'm constantly lonely. :(
In high school I felt out of place without my SO because within my group of friends, two of my friends became "the couple" in the group. Awkward.
I'm in your boat. My friends get along great with my boyfriend, and they enjoy having us around because we're pretty quirky and crazy, so whenever I hang out without him I feel like my other half of quirkyness is missing. I do hang out with my friends on my own, however, but I do prefer him to be around me. :D I love his presence. It's perfectly fine to feel this way, you're just more attached to him than some other people are with their SO's. Just, if you feel like you guys are aggravating eachother, it's time for some away time until you start to miss him again. haha.
P.s. I LOVE SCOTTISH FOLDS. ^_^ Cutest cats EVER.
i think that its important that you and your SO have your own space...i think that someone already suggested spending more time w/ friends. i think this is a good idea because it helps to build independence. personally, i think you should interested in someone who compliments you-- not completes- because you have to be the source of your own happiness.
Don't be so needy!
I guess that happens to me too, but I try not to show it. :)
it happened to me wen i was in hong kong for summer.
had friends there as well as him
well long story
I'm rather independent (:
I think it's important that you have your own interests and you do things that don't always involve your SO. I'm not saying you shouldn't include him. What I'm trying to say is you need to be independent and not rely on him for everything. You two should rely on each other, but it's important to do things on your own that don't necessarily involve each other. I definitely know where you're coming from. I spend more time with my SO than I do with my friends. This is something I need to work on myself.
We have our own things to do n such, but sometimes at the end of a long day out with friends, I just wana see him. We live 10mins away from each other so it's all goood ^__^
maintain your own life! that is an important part of your relationship. remember, the two of you were attracted to each other when you had your own lives.
I feel fine walking through the mall without my bf. or even without a friend. but I am a bit more of a loner than most people.
also, that's not really a 'schizo' way of seeing things. if you wanna get technical, it's a multiple personality disorder or anxiety way of seeing things. but schizo isn't really a great thing to say. to people who are "schizo", that is.