Saturday, 29 August 2009
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I Don't Want to Know About Your Sex Life
Okay, so I'm in high school. I'm sixteen. I'm a virgin. All of my friends in my grade are as well, except three, "Cynthia", her boyfriend "Max", and her ex "Rourke".
Now, Cynthia and Rourke went out for about 4 years, and became sexually active after two or three. We weren't great friends, but we had a mutual friend with whom we were both close to, so often the three of us would hang out a lot. Sometimes Cynthia would mention her sex life, in a kind of bragging way. It would only be briefly - like I said, she and I weren't great friends so she wouldn't go into great detail. Just be like, "Rourke and I had great sex last week" or whatever. Like I said, Cynthia and I weren't great friends, so I didn't hear all the juicy details. Our mutual friend had to hear all that while I wasn't with them. For that, I am now jealous.
You see, time goes by. Our mutual friend and Cynthia had a fight or something, so they don't talk anymore. I'm still friends with Cynthia, and now our friendship is the same as what theirs had been.
So, Cynthia and Max started dating last year (for the record, they are both seventeen) and since I'm now one of her best friends, I get to hear all the details. What stands out most was maybe a week before prom - I was kind of bummed I didn't have a date. Not, "oh god, I'm gonna jump off a bridge!" or anything, but still, kind of mopey. So Cynthia, who sat next to me, turns to me and said "I know how you feel too. I just got my period and I'm so sad, because I was hoping Max and I could be the atypical couple and have sex after prom. You know?"
NO, I don't know. Because I don't have sex every night nor have I even had a boyfriend in, what, three years? Later in that class, she wrote me a note: "Ugh, my cramps are so bad it must be because I've been having sex & enjoying it too much". Thank you for informing me about your period and about how single I am. Appreciate it!
Anyways, aside from those two circumstances, there have been many more, where she actually tells me, you know, how it is. And I guess it would be different if I asked first or was remotely curious about it, but I don't. Cynthia will just bring it up, and I want to just be like shut up! Call me old-fashioned, but intimate details of someone's sex life should only known to be those involved in the sex. And like I said, I don't ask. She's just like "So! Guess what Max and I did the other night..." I love her in every other way, but I DON'T WANT TO KNOW.
So yeah. The point of this whole muddled post is, I guess, do you have any friends that fill you in to the tiniest detail about their sex lives? Do you get annoyed, or do you not mind it?
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Comments (60)
Haha. T M I . I like my sex life to be private. Only between my bf and I. Thanks.
I'm sorry, but LOL at the "Wow these cramps suck. Must be all the great sex." comment. Hahahaha wow.
You need to sit your friend down and tell her outright that enough is enough, imo.
NOPE! I once had a friend ask me how I was in bed, but I'm so good at turning the conversation around I turned it into a joke. hahaha
But I do not want to picture you having sex. NO WANT!
I won't tell you unless it's something REALLY awkward or funny. Other than that the most I'll do is say "I HATE MY PERIOD! I WANNA BE SEXY!"
hahaha
;D
she sounds insecure.
Real gentlemen don't fuck and tell. Talking about their sex lives so obnoxiously is actually the number one way to turn me off.
Oh jeez..I don;t have friends who do this, unless we really WANT to talk about those details. They won't just come out and say those things. But I know of a couple people from the high school I went to who do that. Bragging to every aquaintence about how great the sex was, where they had it, and all the details. Are they so thrilled and attention-seeking that they have to tell EVERYONE?? I don't understand these people. Some things are just personal! Talk about lacking social grace.
i wouldn't be jealous of her at all (not saying you ever said you were). 'cause next thing you know, she'll either be telling you "oh crap, i'm pregnant" or "guess what STD i caught last night?"
yeah,...serious insecure issues is what it sounds like to me. she must feel that "braggin" about her sex life is making her feel more superior than you, but i'm sure she must feel rather empty/alone when she's not with him.
i had girls in my classes when i was in high school telling me how to "have sex" with my boyfriend since I was a virgin. i didn't listen to them 'tho 'cause i knew what type of girls they were, and was sure they had at least 10-15 partners that they had been w/already. ewwww!
It sounds like she's insecure and trying to show off. She probably feels more "grown up" because she's doing a grown-up thing. Either give her the TMI line or just ignore her. I certainly wouldn't be impressed with her. The way she brags about it makes her sound more like a slut than anything else.
Yea I had friends like that before.
I hadnt had sex yet so it was kinda interesting to hear, but still people are too open.
brings me back to me and my bf how he is too open about sexual things and basically everything. and i am not. im the opposite. i dont share shit. idk why i just dont. he hates it, but hey? thats me...im private. or im just different.
blahhhhh whateverrrr
i had a friend sort of like this. rather than brag about sex face to face she just posts myspace statuses like "(so and so): JUST HAD THE MOST AMAZING SEX OF HER LIFE" and little sex jokes or implications in surveys and what not. it could be obnoxious sometimes, but i don't think she knows that and if anything she probably just thinks it makes her seem more secure, like a free spirit or something or that it proves just how outgoing she is.
overall, i don't really mind, and i wouldn't hold it against her because it's just one of those things about her. but it's something i notice. some people are just like that.
My closest friends are virgins, but I do have friends who aren't virgins. I've listened to them talk about their sex lives, but it's not a really big deal to me. They don't talk about it all the time like your friend, though.
You should probably tell your friend that you aren't interested in hearing about her sex life. If I were you, I'd probably tell her I didn't want to hear it, but in a joking way, just to keep the mood light. But if she's still giving way too much information, that's when I'd be serious and tell her I really do not want to know.
ugh i hate it when people share their sex lives with me. i don't want to know, at all. =/ my boyfriend and i have already decided if we ever do have sex, all the details are going to between he and i, and if anyone should ask if we have had sex we'll deny it.
I mean when I was a virgin i loved sitting there and having girl talk about what happened last night and how it was and etc etc....its like sex 101. plus theyre ur girlfriends so u can get into the nitty gritty details of sex and not be ashamed or shy abt it. but i guess this is different since it seems as though she is just bringing it up to brag and she is super young. she doesnt know ne better she thinks its cool....very immature.
but im still kinda stuck on the first sentence you said about your whole grade but these three ppl being virgins. i doubt that is true....especially now a days being a virgin is very very rare.
That is sad, I have taught all my children. Even though some of them are still young. To keep those kind of things private. That something as important as that is not a public INFORMATION network of knowledge and you scream it to the world. It is private and special. I hope they listen to me some day.
My cousin and one of my friends can be too detailed at times. Especially my cousin. And she's weird about it because then she doesn't want details about my sex life. What's up with that? What happened to share and share alike? lol
*cringing*
I couldn't even bring myself to finish reading this post... I got a picture of an immature teenager venting.
I can't even imaging myself being this immature even when I was at this age.
What goes on between two people should STAY between two people. My guess is that she likes to rub stuff in your face.
If people do that to me, then I explain in ELABORATE detail the crap I took last night that nearly had me squeezing out my small intestine through my ass.
:D
- Kunoichi
@kieri126@xanga - lol i think she wrote all her friends in her grade*
I mean I love cracking sexual jokes and stuff, but i think having to listen/talk about your sexual experiences is just wayy too personal.
tell her how you feel.
or stop complaining. you haven't been proactive about getting her to stop, and since you're basically in the "best friends" spot, you get to hear about it because she wants to talk about it.
my friends and i mutually share our sex experiences, because some of the stories are just really funny and some girl time to share and compare is fun. but if someone tells me they don't want to hear it (which no one ever has) then i would stop.
Gentlemen don't kiss and tell. Good thing my friends don't talk about it.
blatantly "bragging" lol.. how sweet of her. srsly who cares?
sometimes my friends and i will talk about it, but we don't go into crazy detail or anything unless something ridiculous or hilarious happened. and if one of us is a virgin or doesn't want to hear about it, we obviously don't make them listen if we're gonna tell something.
also, your friend is kinda dumb-great sex doesn't make your cramps bad. and i doubt she knows what great sex is...
No way do I have friends like that. There's something called "decency" and it's alot classier to keep those juicy details to ourselves.
Haha I think she wants you to think she's having sex. Maybe she isn't o_O and just wants you to be "jealous". Tell her that you aren't getting jealous, but annoyed. Some things need to be kept private!
I just say... "TMI." I honestly don't need to know what you're doing with whoever and you don't need to know what I'm doing with whoever. It's okay to be open about things sometimes, but there's a limit...For me at least. Haha.