that sounds like an awful situation, I've had a guy I was hopelessly in
love with, ask me out. When I said I couldn't rendezvous for that
particular date, he went and asked another girl and they became gf/bf.
When he asked me for relationship advice it absolutely killed me
inside.

Eventually, I realised that he wasn't the type of person I needed in my
life. It was hard, but I decided I needed some time apart from him and
didn't initiate conversation or talk much to him for a while. I just
needed to remember what life was like before I met him. Afterwards I
met the most amazing guy ever (my current boyfriend), and he made me
realise all the things I deserve as a girl, all the things that the
first guy, let'scall him S, couldnt give me. S broke up with his
girlfriend not long after I got together with my boyfriend. When S got
into a relationship, he wanted to talk to me about it and so I happily
listened because I no longer garnered (love/lust/infatuation) emotions
towards him. When he had exhausted talking about his girlfriend (after
a long while), when I said one sentence about my boyfriend he told me
to shut up. I realised that he didn't seem to want to see me happy with
another guy. It seemed immature, and so different to the guy I had
first anticipated him to be.

Now I'm happy I'm out of that situation.

x

I have a situation kind of like that. Slightly different break-up reason, but same after results, I guess you could say. It's hard to deal with, isn't it? :/ Especially when they try to open up to you and ask you for advice... It's almost like a slap in the face, right? :/

*hugs*,

~*Akarui Mitsukai*~

one of my ex was in the closet. when he and i were dating, there were a lot of things that made me question if he was gay or not, i.e. fav show was "will & grace", laughed obscenely loud at gay jokes to hide his insecurity, and even said to me "i like how you can sometimes be a girl and sometimes be a guy".

after a while, the relationship started spinning out of control because he was just extremely insecure or just really confused. the best thing & smartest thing to do is to break off any connection you two still have and give him space to work things out on his own.

@princessremy@xanga - LOL that's what i thought too!

Me and my boyfriend of three years broke up, he wasn't gay, but after being sober the whole time I knew him, he went on a huge drinking binge (weeks long) was dating a ho, started smoking weed, the works
He's gotten better, but hasn't fully recovered. He's dating a nice girl now, and she helps keep him in line, but I had to give him a firm talking to a couple times after we broke up about how he was messing up (we are best friends still) it was awful, but he got through it :D

I don't understand why he seems to be so miserable after breaking up with you if he was the one that wanted it. :(

@princessremy@xanga - haha thats whut i thought

He sounds like he is crying out for help...like He needs a good friend. I also thought you ment homosexual...lol

I think she did mean gay as in sexuality? Because one of the tags for this post is sexuality, haha. Also, I think the whole part about him being confused was indicative of that? I don't know. Hopefully she meant as in sexuality because otherwise, worst choice in words ever. lol

@princessremy@xanga - 

Wait. So he isn't like, homosexual? I'm confused...

But yeah, my ex was like that. He said that he hated people that acted differently around different people. Well, guess what he goes and does? Acts differently around my friends than his friends. And when we broke up? He showed me his real side: asshole.

So is the problem that he's now gay and treating you as just a friend? Or is it that he's still straight but treating you as just a friend? I'm a little unsure of what you meant when you said he was "confused"...

If you were implying that he is now gay, I can DEFINITELY relate with you on that. Back in high school, I became really close to a guy I met. Within a few of months of being friends, we confessed our feelings for each other but felt it best not to act on them since our current situations did not allow it (he was dating one of my friends and I was involved with another guy as well). Time passed, relationships ended, and we finally decided to take our relationship to the next level. We were together for about a year and a half, and I was pretty content with how it went. The one problem, however, was that we were never really "physically" intimate. I was pretty innocent back then so I didn't really think anything of it. Despite that, I was totally into him - in LOVE, even. So when he told me that he wanted to break up, it just about killed me (though it was not much of a surprise since I noticed we were drifting away... or rather, HE was). Maybe about two months after we broke up, he told me he was bisexual... and a few months after that, he told me was gay. At that point, my self-esteem was at an all-time low. And what made it worse was that he kept telling me about these new guys he was getting involved with and asking me for advice advice of whether he should pursue further with them or not. That was definitely a difficult time in my life... I kept wondering if there was something wrong with me that made him make the change. =/ But anyhow, I bit my tongue and stayed friends with him because I concluded that, considering our history, having him in my life was better than not having him there at all.

Today, five years later, I have not regretted it since. He is now one of the greatest friends I have. :)

Haha wow, didn't mean to expand THAT much... :X But now that you know my experience, I hope this gives you an idea of how great it is to have exes as your friends - straight or gay. :) Granted, some are better off forgotten; however, if you feel that he was as good a friend as he was a boyfriend, I suggest not to let go so easily. Yes, it'll be challenging to keep your emotions at bay... but if you let him go, you might be losing a great friend.