Miss Walrus
I encountered a strange situation last night when I was out with my boy, hanging out with some of my (also, boy) friends. Being the gentleman he is, boy drove to my town (45 minutes away from his humble abode), picked me up, whisked me away (er, something like that) & drove me to see my fave local musician. Upon arriving, I met up with some old guy friends from high school--who my boy has met a couple times--to hang out, drink & dance.
However, there was one rather unexpected guest: My guy friend's older (gorgeous, outgoing, completely hammered) sister. We said our "Hello's", everyone was introduced & shots were ordered all around--which could have been exactly what put my friend's tipsy sister over the edge.
Basically, even though my boy was introduced as, well, my boyfriend, older sister found it okay to: 1) Ask him to dance, numerous times 2) Encourage him to go outside with her--alone--for a cigarette 3) Repeatedly profess to him that he was "so cute" and 4) Ask him what he was doing after the show.
Alright, so girl was drunk. And girl is related to one of my really good guy friends, which I thought, somehow meant that she was "safe"-- that any flirting she did with my man was all in good fun. However, as the night went on and sister's eyes grew perpetually more glazed over, I think she forgot that my man was taken---and that I was standing RIGHT THERE!
I tried to keep my cool, but when I heard he say that she wanted "to hang out with him after the show" I shot her the look of death, like, "Really?" However, at that point sister had already stumbled closer to the stage to scream, "I love you!" at the performer.
So, my question is: How exactly are you supposed to handle a situation like this? I didn't know whether I should've done what I did--which was hang back, seething with anger, but not letting it out, or whether I should've asked Miss Drunk Sister to step outside for a few words.
What would you have done?
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Comments (74)
I would have said something. My man is my man and that's that.
I would have said something. Drunk or not, that is no excuse.
I would have told your guy friend to check his sister. Surely he knew it was inappropriate? =/
I woulda smacked a ho.
Kidding, but not really. I would have been really upset. I probably would have been really clingy to my man, too. Let her know what's what. Hopefully boy was stand-off-ish.
i would have laughed heartily at poor drunken skanky girl and ostentatiously claimed my man by holding his hand, putting my arms around him, kissing him, etc. passive aggressive? maybe, but i bet it would work!
Personally I would probably be peeved but not worried about it, as long as my man is committed I don't worry about stuff like that.
You should have stuck to your boy. Everytime that other girl comes and tries to talk with him, just snatch him away to dance or talk or something. It works. It's called cockblocking lol
I wouldve taken her outside and beaten some sense into her, or beaten her senseless, either one would satisfy my anger.
Your boyfriend is the one who should handle this sort of situation, not you. Since he's the one being hit on, he should be the one to firmly and politely turn the person down (and then turn around and give you a big smooch).
@tastytimmm@xanga - lololol! i second your comment. vag-blocking?Â
@just_the_average_jane@xanga - i totally agree with you. i was just going to say the same exact thing. let the man handle the situation.
@just_the_average_jane@xanga - I'm with you on that.
I would've reminded her who I was and then informed her brother how uncomfortable and irritating her behavior had become....and suggested that maybe it was time for someone to take her home.
I probably would've slapped her...and then him for going along with her drunken shenanigans! Not the best choice however...
i would've invited her over for a threesome. hahaha. j/k.
Next time, you should have somehow communicated to your boyfriend that you were uncomfortable with what she was doing. Also, asking him to not only turn her down but make it plainly obvious that you two were together - ie. making out, etc. - something with a stronger, more painfully obvious impact. A kiss might not register to her as well as making out - something she can look at for more than a second.
@just_the_average_jane@xanga - Yesss I agree.
punch da bitch in da face yo!
I would have said something, but if people are that drunk, then there's not much you can say to talk sense into them.
@just_the_average_jane@xanga - i totally agree with u. if my bf is lapping this up, i'ld be glaring at him, not her. if he entertains it, he likes it, he wants the attention. then why's he with me?
I think you should trust your boyfriend. That girl is obviously not able to comprehend words in the state she was in anyway. And if you have to ask "your man" to turn her down, then I guess it wasn't that serious to begin with. But again, I don't know the whole story.
I would've said something. Drunk or not, thats wrong
This situation happened to my husband and I...only reversed. I thought my husband was going to punch the guy!!! Which, if it had been me and some girl was hitting on him...there would've been words. Drunk or not...it is not okay!
I would've said something, but I wouldn't have probably gotten TOO mad. She was hammered, so she wasn't in "her right mind" as you might say. And besides that, as long as your guy didn't show any interest, there wasn't truly anything to ever worry about.
Still, I know this is an audacity which, whether she was drunk or not, nobody wants to put up with. Just like a guy wouldn't like it if his friend's hammered brother kept hitting on his girl whether or not she was responsive to the flirtation. It is just a no-no. Especially if you are standing right there!
On one hand, at least she didn't try to be sneaky, but on the other hand what kind of audacity is that?? But, again, she was drunk. :p
I've known people who do this sort of thing, right in front of the guy's girlfriend, who are perfectly sober though.
Apparently, this is not a new trend either. My grandfather used to have stories about things like this. He said women NEVER hit on him...unless my grandmother was RIGHT THERE in front of them. And it always baffled him.
But, I've seen it myself with people I know. Fortunately, I have never had anyone try something like that with me.
And I say fortunately for more than just the relief factor in it. It's also because...well, I have a tendency not to know when to keep my mouth shut when something so blatant occurs in front of me like that...and it usually gets me into trouble. :/
I think you handled it well, though. I'm assuming that since you didn't mention that your boyfriend actually reciprocated her flirtation that he was not interested. And showed that he was not interested, even if he was polite enough not to tell her outright that she was being a jerk.
If that is the case, then you had nothing to worry about. Sure, it's extremely annoying when someone has such gall, but at least you didn't make things worse by saying something. And you can maybe try to avoid a situation like that in the future, lol :p
I would have said something to bothof them.
1. your man should know she is being innapropriate, but unfortunatly he's probably loving hte attention. I'd tell him to ignore her, please.2. the girl is a fuckin drunk bitch. knock her to the floor and tell her to fuck off. thats that.